A lot of you guys are under the impression that dating isn't worth it. Many of you believe that most middle to upper class women are entitled cunts, with few marketable skills aside from a sometimes moist vagina. Im not here to dispute these assertions. The problem is, you guys are putting women before yourselves. Of course these women aren't worth your dating efforts. Of course her opinions are stupid and all her stories are a means of self validation. That's why your primary objective on a date should be to have fun, regardless of whether the fun is mutual. Here are three ways to have fun with your date on Friday and Saturday nights, with the modern American woman.

Mother Shaming: You know she is a slut if she reveals her sexual escapades on the first date. I don't know, I somehow ended up in his bed it was crazy. I went on a vacation and I met this cute guy...etc. This type of conversation is common if alcohol is involved, because it renders women incapable of responsibly operating their mouths. Rather than slut shaming or giving her validation, take the third option. Tell her whatever slutty/irresponsible thing she does every Thursday night is totally acceptable and will help her be a great mother. You will be an awesome mom you can teach your daughter how to party. Sounds like you've been to the the coolest bars, you'll definitely know, what beers to recommend to your son. She will respond in one of two ways. She will agree with your stupidity and expand on it. Or she will rationalize how its okay for her to do certain things but not for her children. Either way it will be fun to watch.

Telephone Operator: You're at her house. She has this hesitant look on her face, because 4 guys in one week is a lot. You would technically be the fifth, because the other guy doesn't count according to hamster calculus. Most guys in this situation would try and convince her to make out and hopefully escalate to sex. She would then proceed to play the I don't know if we should do this game, deriving maximum validation from rebuffing some advances and not others. Instead of going through all of this bullshit, ask her if she wants to play Telephone Operator. Women are naturally curious and love telephones. So, she's going to say yes. Are you sure? Being a telephone operator is hard work, not everyone is cut out for the job. What qualification do you have to be a good telephone operator? Try to have her buy into the bullshit before feeding it to her. Then when she is desperately begging to play telephone operator, climb on top of her, hold her down, and put a wet finger in her ear. Then say something like : ""Hello this is Mrs. Rose Smith, I would like to be connected to Sears department store.' When she tries to pull your wet finger out of her ear tell her that she needs her earpiece to do her job. If she goes along with it, shes probably down for sex. If not, tell her that she lied to you about her telephone operator qualifications, you are extremely disappointed and this is the last time she will ever hear from Bell Telephone company.

Insist on Being Carried: This works best if your a gargantuan muscle bro like myself and she's a feminist. After a conversation about how women are just as capable as men, can do everything men can do and how everything is unfair, you know its time for her to carry you. At the next available opportunity hop up on her back and insist she carries you. If she doesen't want to haul a 220 pound muscle beast, remind her of all of her arguments. Your strong and independent enough to carry me. I believe in you. When she collapses from your man weight, fireman carry that bitch. Then tell her that she should definitely be paid the same amount as you. Maybe you'll build some physical chemistry or maybe she will hate you. Who knows? Who cares? Just have fun.