I don’t really understand why so many people on Reddit say things like, “If you couldn’t get women in an engineering or STEM course that’s 80% men, you’re just bad with women,” or “Studying psychology or going to a liberal arts college that’s mostly women won’t make a difference.”

I’ve spent over a decade in university environments, working closely in student spaces across two different institutions, and the reality is very different. If you’re a guy in a female-dominated degree—anthropology, archaeology, psychology, education, nursing, linguistics, biomedical sciences, and so on—you genuinely have a significant advantage compared to men in heavily male-dominated fields like computer science, mechanical engineering, or information technology.

From what I’ve seen, men in female-dominated subjects tend to have a much easier time meeting and dating women, even though they are not necessarily more charismatic or socially skilled than the guys in male-majority courses. In fact, some are noticeably less polished—more awkward, more condescending, or more stereotypically “dweeby”—yet they still meet women through their classes and social circles.

Meanwhile, many of the men I’ve spoken to in computer science or similar fields are perfectly normal, often more introverted but also more considerate and better put-together—they just don’t have many opportunities to meet women and rarely cold-approach.

These demographic effects also extend beyond university settings. It can be far easier for an average man to date in regional cities—Liverpool, Newcastle, Salt Lake City, Little Rock—where the population is closer to the median, compared to world-class international cities like London, New York, or San Francisco, where extreme wealth inequality and competition distort the dating landscape.