Divorce, a set path?

TheAirborne · 2017-09-17T16:41:51+00:00

I have a few thoughts on this post.

First, as a lawyer (not giving legal advice here), the court does heavily favor women. The court is very patriarchal when it comes to protecting the rights of women, so much so, that now that things have changed culturally regarding gender roles... it results in injustice.

However, if you can prove your wife is cheating on you, and you take immediate action to protect your rights... the court often takes this into heavy consideration. The issue then becomes support of the children and whoever has custody (which will usually be the woman unless you're prudent in gaining evidence of her being an unfit mother). The court also does not take kindly to turning kids against a parent. Again, if you do your best to take/keep any evidence that this is happening the court will often come to more lenient conclusions. Also, depending on your state, once the woman finds another spouse your obligation to her specifically will be expunged.

All of these examples seem to stem from a simple problem: The woman they married and how they maintained the relationship. While I disagree about the view TRP has on LTRs, I certainly agree that if you enter a relationship with a Blue Pill mentality... it will end disastrously. Why marry a spoiled princess who doesn't work? Why marry someone who wants children if your sterile? Why marry anyone that treats you with disrespect? There are NUMEROUS red flags that these individuals were malleable shit-heads and did things without seeing the woman as she truly was.
Speaking from an economics prospective, there is a very simple way to break down what a man and a woman offer each other in a relationship. It's these that a man MUST ensure for a marriage to work. Men, offer women security, protection, and provision. Women, offer men sexual exclusivity so that they can be ensured that their offspring are theirs, and comfort/emotional support.

If someone you're dating continues to act single, trolls bars, go out with their single friends, and consistently buck your control... then you shouldn't marry her or continue to be in a relationship with her. Plate, and move on.

MattyAnon · 2017-09-18T00:15:33+00:00

Do Not Marry

That's all you need to know.

TheLaughingRhino · 2017-09-18T15:54:07+00:00

My observation and experience from the legal system in America in terms of family law

The courts do not punish men specifically, they punish the the spouse who disproportionately outearns the other. Occasionally a woman will get hit in family court and have to pay child support, but it is rare, since most women will only try to date up on the socio economic ladder. Thus more men take the big hit financially in a divorce. There are relationships where, over time, the woman can outearn the man, in most of those cases I've seen, the woman either stays and cheats or moves to branch swing. Leaving you MIGHT not be the total worst case scenario. The worst case scenario is she stays and cheats, take into account most men are plugged in blue pill men, so either they don't know they are being cheated on or rationalize it away. At least divorced men can have some of their free time back ( little to no consolation)
In a "no fault" system, the only practical way to use something like a woman's infidelity against her is to associate it with the breakdown of assets. For example, if you say you and her decided you want to try to get your kids into a nice private school but recognized you couldn't afford it, but you can show documented evidence that she was using and spending money to rent hotel rooms to conduct an affair, THEN you can use her affair against her in a roundabout way. Just saying she had an affair in a no fault state ( and IIRC, all states except one are no fault) literally means nothing in terms of the division of assets. All that matters is no one is going on the government dime. If the courts have a choice in making you pay to take care of that kid and her, or the state, it's going to be you. Why do you think Canada is such a battlezone for single moms? Men there have figured out they can be leveraged into paying for kids that are not even theirs.
If you get a pre-nup, you have to understand that it's not some magic pill that solves anything. The worst conception of a pre-nup is that it is making sure you lose nothing as a guy. That's not how it actually works. A pre-nup is basically a structured buy out if you are the guy and the primary breadwinner. If you decide to try to get a pre-nup, you need to make sure she has her own lawyer and that she pays for them herself with her own money. You also want a retired judge as a mediator to go over the terms together, that you VIDEOTAPE and get copies to everyone involved. This can have no future legal bearing, the videotaping, however it will be difficult to say she was under "duress" when she signed the document
If you think she is cheating ( she probably is, that's just fucking sad, is it not?), don't confront her. Stop having sex with her. Period. When she's not home, put a keylogger on any shared computers. Get a video camera and use it while you SEARCH YOUR ENTIRE HOUSE/CONDO. Top to bottom. The taping is so you can put everything back later the same way. You'd be surprised how many people find that extra cell phone. Or love letters to Chad. Or documents from the divorce lawyer she hired in private on is on retainer. Or who knows what else.... Make copies, take photos. Say nothing. Pretend as if nothing has changed. If she wants to know why you are not intimate, just spend more time at work. Or claim some sports injury. What you want to prevent is some blowjob clouding your mind or the risk of getting her pregnant or pregnant again.

Bite the bullet, and hire a private detective. Get as much documented evidence of her cheating. Photos of her coming into a hotel room. Audio if you can get it. Emails. Digital copies and hard copies. If the divorce proceedings don't go your way, if she's not "reasonable" in a "buyout" situation, then wait, once all the paperwork is final, then carpetbomb her. Her work, her family, her friends, her church, the neighbors, the entire social circle. Copies of everything to them. Bombard them. Women HATE to be shamed in public. They hate looking bad in public. It's a preemptive strike, because have no doubt, she will try to spin and lie to turn your shared social circle against you. She rages and screams and cusses at you, then fine, audio record it, upload it, share that too. Destroy her social circle. Destroy her reputation. No mercy. She won't show you any.

You want to be the one who ambushes her. You want to be the one who states they want a divorce. You want to be the one who has spent tons of time preparing for basically "war". You want to be the one who files. You want to pick a time and place and setting that is to your advantage. It's usually the guy who gets blindsided, who ends up lost and confused then agrees to a shit deal that can last 10-20 years of financial hell.

If you are in the process of getting a divorce. Find a support group outside your social circle. Get a PO BOX and another cell phone. Keep your financial records isolated from her as much as possible as a matter of principle. Do not speak about your divorce to anyone in your social circle. You don't know who you can trust and you don't know who will say what. Bob, the neighbor, whose wife is friends with your soon to be ex. He seems cool. You watch football together. But do you think he'll stay silent when he's in bed with his wife ( while his wife is dreaming about Tyrone's dick in her mouth) about things you've said to him that you thought were private?

I agree with the esteemed Matty Anon, why fucking even bother.

Guys, I've been to real "war" I've seen some of the most truly fucked up things on this planet. Children sold into sexual slavery. Ethnic cleansing. People living in the worst poverty possible. When I come "home", I want, I desire, I need "peace" Getting married is basically a precursor to another war that no man should ever want to have to fight or deal with or tolerate. Think about another guy you truly fucking hate in life. Divorce is so totally fucked up that you'd not even want to wish that upon him. Think about how fucked up that is, that you wouldn't piss on that lousy fuck if he was set on fire, but you wouldn't inflict the pain of divorce onto him.

The problem with divorce is the SAME PROBLEM with marriage - You must operate on a no mistake/zero tolerance structure. You can't slip up once. Even if you do everything practically and "correctly" to your best odds, you can still get hit.

Sit down with a married man sometime. Even ones you think are "happy" Get them drunk. And then after a while, when they think no one will remember or are listening, they'll finally say it. They love their kids, they wouldn't trade their kids for all the gold and pussy in the world, but they wouldn't do it again, they wouldn't marry again if they could go back in time. More than that, look at coworker, neighbors, people you know. Look at how often you see the fucking resentment in the eyes of the wives to their husbands. Like they are fucking scum. I picked you, but I resent you, because you aren't better than what I can get. So it's your fault. Then look at women around you who are married, but act single. Rubbing your chest, flirting with you, hoping someone will have more money or more stuff or more status to branch swing or cheat. I am not saying all guys are fucking peaches here, most guys are worthless pieces of shit too. I am saying the possible upside, if any, is so tiny, and the odds of finding it are so extreme, then why fucking even bother?

Do you know why single guys who own a home alone and live alone so often never get married? Because of the parade of divorced guys they know who need to crash on their couch. Think about it, a guy can make six figures but still need to end up on your couch because the cost is so destructive.

When you are married, you are not even a fucking human being. You are a sperm dispensing ATM. One that has to shoot out little treats of attention and validation and status otherwise she will just set you on fire. At best. If it's even your fucking kid in the first place. It might be the mailmans. It could be her ex on Facebook. It could be Chad/Tyrone from her work.

You can love women. Or you can understand women. You just can't do both.

When you unplug, that should be the LAST MOTHERFUCKING TIME anything a woman says or does, now or in the past, should ever hurt you or make you angry again. You get married, and remember 94 percent of modern marriages don't last 10 years, and you are buying into a life plan where you are gonna get hurt and angry for pretty much forever.

Matty Anon will say, don't get married ever. And he's right.

I'll say, love yourself enough to where you will never pick something intentionally only designed to make you suffer.

The only thing you'll ever have in common with a woman you marry is the fact that neither of you will really love you.

GayLubeOil · 2017-09-18T09:49:28+00:00

At the end if the day it simply comes down to incentive structure. Let's look at some examples before we get at the meat of the issue.

NAFTA removed protective tarrifs creating an incentive for manufacturing to move to cheap labour Mexico.
Refugees come to Sweden and Germany and not Eastern Europe because the former have much more generous welfare programs than the latter.
The Federal Government giving out student loans like hot cakes, caused the price of education to spike.

There are endless examples of government policies creating social change. Yes NAFTA didn't destroy all American manufacturing but it destroyed a lot of it, enough to completely alter the American economy. Normies are incapable of understanding the difference between a substantive amount and all. They can only think in black and white. Therefore they can only understand all or nothing issues like gay marriage and marijuana legalization. I digress.

The current legal climate incentivizes divorce because it was desighned to incentivize divorce. Without daddy in the house it's a lot easier to teach the children to become transvestites. Mommy will do whatever the authorities and television tell her to do.

yomo86 · 2017-09-17T18:39:28+00:00

Yes, I spare you the legalese and just plain out tell you: everybody in my law-educated circle of friends and colleagues is NOT married. Mind you, they have very healthy and surprisingly fulfilling relationships. 70% of marriages end in divorce and when children are involved this risk will even rise. They are by no means RP but they know...

There is a post on TRP called "you got a stranger pregnant: a guide" in which the OP does everything right from a legal standpoint only regarding to the matter of kids, and is still at odds with the system.

Believe me, I am not a MGTOW nor I am stuck in the anger phase. I simply realized that marriage, as a legal institution as it is, is a mine field and when you finally made it through it, the result is literally no-prize.

This is the endgame you are going to play when you marry, betting half of you, your sanity, your money, your property, your friends, your family ties on the the chance that the fickle mind of a woman does not change until you die.

Women are not parasites per se. The system simply encourages this behavior out of greed (us lawyers) and economic reasons (better the husband than society).

Bon chance my friend. You have been warned.

mattizie · 2017-09-18T09:32:56+00:00

Don't marry unless she earns much more than you, and this isn't likely to change.

Or if you can find a way to make sure that if she leaves she gets nothing. ie, all "your" money/assets belong to a company, you officially get paid minimum wage or 1 dollar.

Or you have so much power/connections that if she tried to sue for anything from you, she'd suddenly commit suicide with 2 shots to the back of the head before throwing ones-self of a tall building whilst locked inside a zipped up duffel bag. Like Bill Clinton and his bastard children.

Other than that. You′d have to be an idiot.

bolupua · 2017-09-18T06:36:13+00:00

So what I've taken from this is that some women are like parasites, seeing their men as resources

Well, obviously. You can see a pattern here: Those womens were fighting for their children, not for their men. Remember: men loves women, women loves child, child love dogs.

You missed another kind of women: The one that doesn't even love his child. That's my ex. Bitch didn't sue me for alimony, doesn't even want the kid, she abandoned him completely and now I'm 100% in charge. Scary fucked up shit, I tell you.

AllahHatesFags · 2017-09-20T13:44:30+00:00

One of the best videos I ever saw on Youtube was when Dick Masterson went on doctor Phil's show and stood next to an ATM and said "This what you are to them."

markpf73 · 2017-09-17T21:09:03+00:00

In any relationship (romantic, platonic, or business) you should know if you are "the means to another's end" or "the end of another's mean". I try to be the latter.

SasquatchMcKraken · 2017-09-17T19:26:32+00:00

I'm sure there were countless red flags long before these folks married that the guys simply failed to pick up on. But it's a little late for recrimination in all cases concerned. My takeaway from this is get irrefutable proof of her cheating, then burn the whole motherfucker down with a smile. If she wants to fight you about things like custody (in the unfortunate event that you've knocked her up), threaten to make her the most famous whore of the year. Even if the court won't give a shit, you can guarantee that she will. Without heartlessly making them pawns, the kids should also know damn well why mommy and daddy aren't together anymore. A lot more men need a lot more self-respect and ruthlessness when it comes to these cucking/BB situations.

KCBrowsin · 2017-09-18T03:30:08+00:00

Bit of a tangent but does anyone else cringe whenever someone says "we will call him/her _____"

Its so meaningless. Why not just put some random names in there, not like anyone would know.

setsuna0 · 2017-09-18T04:37:04+00:00

Damn I used to want to get married until I came here. So many horror stories

JBo4Three · 2017-09-17T17:07:05+00:00

I wish your friends had real names.

TheOriginalWasBetter · 2017-09-17T19:36:35+00:00

Not much to go on in the first story, other than the guy wasn't very masculine, though that doesn't excuse the woman's behavior obviously. The second guy just made a stupid decision. Don't date women with poor moral values, let alone marry them. If you marry a lazy and entitled woman then don't be surprised when she acts that way. Third guy is also letting himself be taken advantage of.

The courts are definitely unfair and biased towards women, but I'm not a lawyer so I don't have any solutions to that. However, it is important to note that the majority of couples with problems ignored red flags when dating and so it's really their own fault for being in a toxic relationship. Stop dating shitty women. If she keeps orbiters, don't date her. If she's ever cheated, don't date her. If she's passive aggressive, don't date her. If she's lazy, don't date her. In most cases the problems in marriage showed themselves long before marriage, but the guy gave the woman a pass for whatever reason and now he's paying the price.

Also, I don't necessarily think women are viewing men as resources. There may be some truth to that, especially in the case of entitled women, but I think it also has to do with an innate desire to test a man's strength. Men do it too just in different ways. Men jokingly insult each other to test each other's strength, but if a man fails the test and gets all defensive and whiny then he just gets teased more and more and more. There's always the guy at work or at school who just never stands up for himself and so he gets teased relentlessly by almost everyone simply because he never stands up for himself.

I've had this happen to me, one of my coworkers would tease me relentlessly years ago back before I understood any of this stuff. This went on for maybe a year or so until I eventually started reading books on masculinity and learning about this stuff. I realized what was going on and starting standing up for myself and bantering with him, and then almost overnight it stopped and he started showing a lot of respect for me and asking me for advice about a woman he was dating and sometimes even seemed submissive at times looking for my approval because I was better at our job than he was in many ways. A different coworker who was very feminine and emotional became the brunt of his teasing and it was amusing to listen to them to say the least.

When a man is strong and stands up for himself then he gets respect from other people, and when he's weak and he doesn't then he's just a joke for everyone to laugh at and walk all over. Of course there will always be people who lack morals and don't respect or care for anyone but themselves, but in general if a woman isn't respecting you the first question to ask is 'do you respect yourself?'. If the answer is no then that's the first place you need to start.

coluorred · 2017-09-18T02:48:28+00:00

Geez.... all of these guys are just beta-bux bitches being used as resource providers to fund their whores indulgences with Alpah-F*cks.

Did you at least try to Red-knight these lost souls?

Title	Divorce, a set path?
Author	Gottagetmesumofdat
Upvotes	36
Comments	57
Date	September 17, 2017 4:18 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/70ofrp/divorce_a_set_path/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/divorce-a-set-path.46055 https://theredarchive.com/post/46055

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Do Not Marry