Looking for getting a guide together to navigating and winning a divorce.

Position5hero · 2014-10-20T19:39:17+00:00

Have any red pillers out there had a successful divorce

it doesn't work like that.

Your only hope is to limit the damage that can be done.

Contact a divorce attorney first, keep her in the dark

Don't let her mount an offense.

Anyways, more importantly, if you go into the marridge expecting a divorce, come on dude, don't get married.

zxDanKwan · 2014-10-21T00:05:04+00:00

A lot of people here seem to be focused on what to do to survive divorce.

You, my friend, are preemptively preparing for it. That gives you significant advantages - so long as you take advantage of that time to set things up correctly.

There are a few things I recommend you do. There are never any guarantees you'll win, but there's no reason not to do these two things.

1) Pre-nup. Reviewed by at least 2 lawyers. Pay the 2nd one to critique the first one's work. Pay the 1st one to critique the 2nd one's version. Then take both to a 3rd lawyer and let him draft up the best of all versions.

2) Definitely check this one with a lawyer, but this is what my father told me when I inherited money after I was married (live in CA). Keep your money separate from the family money. Anything you get from anything that does not involve her (such as the inheritance I received, but possibly also your own salary?)- that goes into your own personal account. Then, you transfer money over from that account into the family account whenever you want to give her or the family any money.

This establishes for your marriage that the "style of life" she is accustomed to is NOT equal to the amount of money you make or have available to you.

The principle here is that when the topic of alimony comes along, you usually have to pay out based on what she had access to, not what you had access to. If you had a million dollars secured in a bank account from before the marriage that she never touched, then she has no claim to it at any point, during or after the marriage.

Now, again, as I said before - check with a lawyer. I am not one. I could have been fed some bad advice (albeit unintentionally). My father was super on top of money and investments, so I consider this to be territory he was well versed in, but he certainly was not a lawyer, either.

Zanford · 2014-10-21T18:03:57+00:00

A strange game, marrriage. The only way to win is not to play.

JustaCountryLawyer · 2014-10-22T06:28:24+00:00

Evil divorce lawyer here. For money, you'll get screwed unless your plan is to be a broke ass forever. If you have pre-existing money, keep it segregated from any after marriage money. If you have kids, make sure you are hyper involved and there is a paper trail of your involvement. Take them to all their Dr appointments, dental visits, and go to all school conferences. Speak up at the Dr appointments. You'd be surprised how detailed medical records are in observing who is involved in parenting. Volunteer at school, coach sports, let her go out on all the girls nights she wants and keep timely notes with dates. Hold your frame and don't do stupid shit like yelling, spanking, breaking shit, or getting wasted in front of your kids. If all of this is too much to handle, keep your dick in your pants and the ring in your pocket.

RBuddDwyer · 2014-10-20T20:46:25+00:00

in most cases child support and alimony are not dischargeable in the event of bankruptcy.

What I can surmise from the article is that he paid her off up front for the alimony and child support rather than stretch it out over years of payments. There was some kind of debt / equity swap where he wound up getting the house and all of the debt, she got cash and assets and (presumably) no debt in exchange for no alimony / child support. He might have also remortgaged the house to pay her more in cash. He then declared bankruptcy, got the debt discharged, and lived in the house for four years while the foreclosure / eviction process dragged on. He obviously timed this just right at the beginning of the foreclosure crisis.

Very ballsy, you had better know damn well what you are doing. And the bankruptcy on your record makes all of your future credit very expensive for the seven years it takes to fall off your record. Also, divorce hurts your credit rating as well. You can still get credit after each, but it becomes very expensive. You find car loans all of the sudden cost over 10%, and you have to put down a huge security deposit for everything (like rent, electric, water, gas, etc...).

One thing that doesn't quite make sense to me is he said he filed Chapter 13, which is personal reorganization. This is usually when you just need some breathing room to renegotiate your debt, not when you want to liquidate and discharge all debts. There would not be a whole lot of cash left for him had he gone through Chapter 7 (unless he hid assets).

CryptoManbeard · 2014-10-22T12:19:56+00:00

You MUST go to dadsdivorce.com These are the experts of custody and divorce. What TRP is to relationships, they are to mens divorce.

As someone who has spent a significant amount of time dealing with this, and reading others' stories, I can tell you that there is rarely a "winning" when you have a penis in family court.

What you must do is fight very hard to not get screwed over. A winning scenario will not look like you keeping all of your stuff, it will look like you getting half the assetts and half the liabilities, and getting joint custody of your children. Unless your STBX is a crack dealer, abuses the children to the point of hospitalization, or has clinical mental health issues (keyword clinical), you are unlikely to get primary custody if she does not agree to it.

That being said, in high conflict divorces, it is a very poor strategy to act amicably. You want to constantly be pushing the line on what you want and fight for, so that when you concede you end up on middle ground. If you fight for middle ground you will end up doing worse than that.

The trick with divorce is to always be prepared, and always be a few steps ahead of your STBX. Hiring the best lawyer you can is paramount, whatever you plan on saving by cheaping out your lawyer will cost you 10x that over the long run. Go to dadsdivorce.com (might be mensdivorce.com now), and read "The List". Memorize that, and paste it to your bathroom mirror so you can read it every day.

rpscrote · 2014-10-22T16:39:19+00:00

Prenup. Prenup. Prenup. Prenup.

Get a family law attorney to write up a prenup. Give it to future wife AND HAVE HER HAVE HER DIFFERENT ATTORNEY REVIEW IT. This is NOT negotiable. Legally, she can waive that right but you will be in such a better place if she has a second attorney look at it.

People get all butthurt over prenups, but its completely ludicrous not to get one. People sign contracts to pay $15 a month to go to the fucking gym, but they won't outline the terms of the deal/consequences/planning for the biggest transaction in their entire life? Why wait to try to agree on shit when you hate each other during a divorce? Figure out the hard shit NOW while you are inclined to help each other.

Don't try to do it yourself. Get a lawyer.

BrunoOh · 2014-10-20T19:42:39+00:00

Have any red pillers out there had a successful divorce

The best way to win a divorce is to never marry.

it is clear I will likely be married in the future.

You know what divorce rape is and are still willing to marry? You are a moron.

All the mainstream blue pill guides

You're subscribing to blue pill guides? Why the fuck do you care about anything a bluepiller says?

pureimpurity · 2014-10-20T20:14:35+00:00

Game is rigged, yo. You can't, in any effective way, prepare for a game that is rigged. Just lubricate and hope your lady will be gentle.

RBuddDwyer · 2014-10-20T20:53:02+00:00

One thing I am banking on is the fact that for most of our married life, my wife made more money than I did. She currently makes only slightly less than I, but that is only because she is working fewer hours per week. If we were to get divorced, my state's divorce laws would factor in her underemployment for purposes of alimony, and could (theoretically) find that she owes me alimony. She could easily double or triple my salary if she wanted to, but she chooses not to.

phillip42069 · 2014-10-21T09:52:52+00:00

Adopt. A child within 2 ppl not interested in being together is a terrible way for him/her to grow up. I have a 13 month old with a GIRL not a woman. And I want to shoot myself sometimes when I think about the years and tears my daughter is going to spend being fed lies by her mom and if she's going to be able to actually see what is going on and decide for herself what shes want to feel. I'm scared shitless of the day that comes and she will see what happened and where I'm coming from in the situation and what her response to me will be

rpscrote · 2014-10-21T11:10:49+00:00

[permanently deleted]

TVTestPattern · 2014-10-22T14:44:37+00:00

Since you're willing to risk massive amounts of money on a 50/50 roll of the dice, how about you escrow half of your assets right now and actually flip a coin?

You win?

You can keep what you have earned.

You lose?

I get half.

Are you serious with this shit?

BluepillProfessor · 2014-10-31T01:13:47+00:00

A successful divorce is like a rocket launch failure. If it explodes, the best you can do is have you and your valuables outside the blast zone and blow it the hell up before it flies over a populated area.

williamwilliam2 · 2014-10-20T21:58:18+00:00

I had something called THELIST for men preparing for divorce about ten years ago.

Title	Looking for getting a guide together to navigating and winning a divorce.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	11
Comments	31
Date	October 20, 2014 7:35 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/2jtboq/looking_for_getting_a_guide_together_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/looking-for-getting-a-guide-together-to-navigating.23305 https://theredarchive.com/post/23305

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