INTRO

I’d like to examine how Betas view dating, identifying how and why they fall into certain traps.

BODY

The average Beta male (we’ll call him Jason) shows up to a date with a cute girl. Lacking Red Pill wisdom, Jason doesn’t make a big distinction between masculine and feminine polarity. He figures: “I’m here with another human being, who just happens to be female.”

Jason’s Nice Guy emphasis on equality, however, does not change the realities underpinning the sexual marketplace. Indeed, with the rise of Tinder, we now have hard data to back up dating truths men have known forever. From a large Cornell University study:

“Men and women use entirely different strategies to engage a potential mate on Tinder. Men tend to like a large proportion of the women they view but receive only a tiny fraction of matches in return—just 0.6 percent. Women use the opposite strategy. They are far more selective about who they like but have a much higher matching rate of about 10 percent.” (1)

Simply put: the average woman has many more options than the average guy. Nice Guy Jason probably hasn’t read any scientific studies on Tinder; however, he is still subconsciously aware of the market forces at play. Whereas Jason’s date enters the night with an abundance mentality and a sense of detachment (since she can easily Next him and return to a queue of fawning men), Jason feels pressure to perform. This is his chance - better not fuck it up!

We thus have a schizophrenic situation: even though “men and women use entirely different strategies...," Jason enters the date with a steadfast belief that everyone is (or should be) the same. This dichotomy produces much anxiety and turmoil in him beneath the surface.

BETA MATING STRATEGY

Despite this background anxiety, Jason shows up to the agreed upon restaurant and the date begins. And you know what? Things go OK (from his perspective). He and his date talk about their careers and favorite TV shows and she even laughs at his joke about how bad the city’s Metro system has been lately.

Jason, though, without even realizing it has succumbed to Beta Slavery. Does he expect to turn this woman on with discussions about Netflix and Metro construction? Sure some small talk is inevitable, but how can he expect to make this woman moan later on if he’s talking to her like a co-worker in the break room? What is he doing?

There are two factors at play here:

  • Jason’s lack of masculine polarity (instead of flirting “from above,” he immediately affirms they’re on an equal playing field) extinguishes the date’s sexual tension. Without this dynamism, the date’s Frame shifts into the non-sexual.

  • Remember, the woman still has 10x as many options as Jason. This fact plus Jason’s decision to voluntarily relinquish his masculine polarity (which is supposed to counter-balance the fact that women are the gatekeepers of sex) means that power shifts to the woman.

There is never equality. Jason’s date is now in the dominant position, and has a question to ask herself. Does she want to trade sex in exchange for a Slave? Of course, she could replace Jason any time, but having a beta slave to flatter her ego could be fun for awhile. This machiavellian calculation - based on masters and slaves - is in line with what we often call the "666" sphere of human relationships. Jason’s unpolarized beta-slave state is known in some circles as “555.”

If the woman is insecure and seeking validation, it’s quite possible she’ll go on another date with Jason, and then start hooking up with him. However, it will be an unequal relationship from start till finish, with all of her emotional needs getting met, and none of his. Jason thus finds himself in a lose-lose situation: he either is rejected outright or becomes a Beta-slave. Anxiety inducing indeed.

THE AWAKENING

The dynamic mentioned above is how many men find the Red Pill in the first place. A series of rejections and unfulfilling relationships makes them think: “There must be another way.” Here the Red Pill transformation begins, and our former beta Jason learns Game.

Jason begins to accept the differences between the sexes. He reasons: “Alright, women may have more options available, but as a man I get to play Captain in my interactions with them. Wait a second - that actually makes sense. The genders are different, but they both have things going for them.”

On his next date, Jason takes on a more commanding tone. He speaks directly to his date, communicating with his tone, body language, and lack of political correctness that he’s looking for a sexual relationship. Not a “friend.” With this more direct manner, Jason forces his date to show her cards. Either she’s interested in him or not - the option of making him into a beta slave is simply taken off the table. Rejection in this context takes on a different meaning. It’s no longer scary, and actually is useful since it means he can quickly move past women who aren’t interested in him.

(1) https://www.technologyreview.com/s/601909/how-tinder-feedback-loop-forces-men-and-women-into-extreme-strategies/