Summary: For many guys all PUAs are superheroes doing unbelievable things and coming out unscathed. Our most obvious superpower is the ability to approach any girl, anywhere. But there's more... it's our ability to walk away.

 

Your New Superpower

 

Anyone that looks for pickup advice or coaching is perfectly aware of one thing that changed his life: he can approach any girl he wants. It's mind-blowing idea but not the only one on their journey. The second secret usually blows their mind. It's the notion that they can eject from any set at any time.

You just have to say "I'd love to talk with you more but I have to go. Enjoy your day!" and walk away. No explanation needed.

Why is this such a big thing? Both beginners and intermediates can disguise their anxiety in being picky or having bad eyesight. How many times I've heard "I didn't see her face", "she's probably too young", "she looks busy", "she could be fat". I used to say "go and find out" but now I'm giving an exit strategy: "go, tell her the compliment and eject if she's not good enough".

Whenever you think a girl is hot "but..." - approach her and find out. In most cases, those doubts will be unfounded. It was your brain trying to save you from doing a very dangerous thing - approaching a mediocre girl. From now on, you'll realize it is no longer dangerous. Yes, any girl can reject you but you too can reject her and be gone in an instant. You risk nothing.

 

No Obligations

 

I always say that the girl doesn't owe you anything. Good reaction doesn't mean she has to give you her number. Number doesn't guarantee you a date or even a reply. And going on a date with her doesn't mean she will have to sleep with you. No one owes anyone anything.

You can use that to your advantage. You don't owe her anything as well. The mere fact of telling her a compliment doesn't mean that you have to stay in set for 10 minutes. The same thing can happen on your dates - if you're not feeling it then you should bail. If at any point it's no longer fun - don't do it.

You're both equal participants in the process to learn more about each other and maybe - if you decide to - have sex. But either of you can decide that it isn't working out. Though of course all this pick up stuff is to make sure that it will be you who's going to decide.

 

Lie... To Yourself

 

Lying to yourself is a common strategy that can result in doing more things. When learning how to pick up girls you say "I'll just go to her, say hello and eject" but you very well know that you'll stick in that conversation for few minutes.

If you're having approach anxiety then your lie will be "I'll just start running towards her, I don't have to approach". Once you make that first step you've already decided that you will do this.

Practice that way of thinking and you'll be able to achieve most of the things you want. Pretend like there is a way for you to eject at any point of an activity. Because there is always some way out unless you're strapped to a car on a rollercoaster.

Starting something is always the toughest phase. The stop/open/approach is that moment in pick up. Convince yourself into thinking that you can eject from any given set and combine that with "let's find out" attitude to conquer all your doubts. "She's probably too young... let's find out! I can always eject!"

Because you really can eject from any set. At the same time, once you tell yourself that, you'll rarely will.

 

Summary:

  • Approach girls that you aren't unsure of but they seem hot. Make it a habit.
  • You can eject just like that, you don't need an excuse.
  • Practice that everywhere: "I don't have to finish that task I really, really don't want to do. I'll just start doing it, just for five minutes."
  • Lie to yourself if necessary. Imagine doing just the first step. You can do this.

 

That's half of mental masturbation and half of actionable advice. If you liked it then there's more.