Ain’t this the truth!

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[–]sleepyweaselisawakePlowing his way through muck[🍰] 90 points91 points92 points 6 years ago2 (49 children) | Copy Link

Sit back and give me a few moments of your time because I'm about to solve all your problems. Women who lurk might want to pay attention.

You say you're an engineer and despite everything you think you know about men and relationships the numbers just add up. Here's why:

"Where are all the men who appreciate women who do these things?"

They're out there, but they're beneath your purview. You've swiped left, ignored, and rejected them for reasons known only to you.

"I am constantly pursued by men who say they want a hot woman to behave this way, but all I get is run over."

You're constantly pursued by men, but have you ever pursued a guy? Have you ever asked a guy out? Have you ever approached a guy to say, "Hello?" If the answer is no (I'd bet a paycheck it is) then you're the problem. You refuse to take the initiative and pursue men you're interested in. Like most women to take the passive approach and only date the guys who pursue you, meet your standards and even with all those options you still choose poorly and complain.

"They don't really appreciate me until I end the one-sided relationship. There is zero appreciation for women who do this for our men. None."

Do you know why? Probably not, so I'm going to tell you. It's because all those men you're so desperate to impress have options. They can date women hotter than you and they know that the minute they validate anything you do you'll get bored and leave anyway.

"I bring in 6 figures - husband bitches I earn more than him. I work out (pole dance as I have a pole in my home and a room dedicated to it) and I get called a whore."

You married him. You ignored the red flags (like most women) and married him. Learn to live with his behavior or divorce him. But, never forget you rejected dozens of good men and CHOSE to marry him.

"I look like I'm 24, but I'm 36 with a degree in Engineering. I keep myself up just to get put down. I cook organic home-made food, I clean up (when Im not paying our housekeepers to help out bc he's such a slob), I buy sexy lingerie, I watch porn with him and mimic what he likes....All I get is crap."

Once again you rejected, ignored, and swiped left on good men to marry him.

"I've never had a man appreciate me behaving this way."

Because you choose to date and now you're married to the wrong man.

"The good men never pursue me."

I seriously doubt that. In fact, I bet lots of great men tried to pursue you and you decided they weren't your "type." Those guys have moved on to other things and are better off for it.

"Just the losers who want a free ride."

One more time for the ones in the back. You 👏 Chose 👏 Those 👏 Men 👏.

"Maybe that's one reason so many women these days don't learn to cook, don't clean, and don't suck your dicks..."

Or, maybe women don't learn those skills because from 18-25 women have a dick buffet lined up before them and don't have to put any effort into a relationship until of course.. they do.

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[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla 59 points60 points61 points 6 years ago* (7 children) | Copy Link

You have answered your own questions. You just don't understand what your problems are. I'll highlight some here.

You're 36. You might look good for your age, but you don't look like 24. That's just people being polite to you.
When you're 36, you no longer hold a power position in the sexual market place. If you aim to get a man who is in demand, you will have to distinguish yourself from the younger, hotter, tighter women.
And the way every woman who chases after a better man does this is by being easy or by being submissive (and serving/pampering) hoping that that will keep him. In short, you're not being extra ordinary. This is what you're supposed to do.
When this is not enough, they just go after young women. Aka gold diggers: younger, hotter women who are content with banking on their youth.
Your Engineering degree is sexy on a man. On you, it's nice. It's not essential. It's not sexy. It's not strong. It's nice you have that.
Men are not insecure about your higher income or your advanced degree. They get irritated by the attitude that comes with it. Especially if they can support themselves.
Your choice for a workout is pole dancing. You might deny all you want, but this shows something about you that men who are looking for a wife do not appreciate.
You are not dealing with Good men. They can plainly see what I've listed here. They do not want to entertain you because you could be a liability rather than an asset.
You get constantly pursued by players who know exactly what to say to make you behave exactly the way they want you to behave. You get your ego fed. They get a compliant and sexually available woman.
There's not a high chance you can get yourself a good man. You have consistently chosen the wrong men and you are very bitter about men.
You are not a traditional woman. You just claim to be one. Just because you call your Kia a BMW does not make it so.
Men who are interested in good women are looking for women who are good because that is natural to them and that is what they think they're supposed to do. That is not you. You are a good woman to secure yourself a good man.
Women these days don't cook, don't clean, don't suck their husband's dick because they put their ego above their happiness. You cannot have both. Women who put their long term happiness often marry a good man very young and dedicate themselves to the well being of her husband and to raising their family. They do not put their education or career first. That's a masculine quality. And women who follow that path will end up getting treated like a defective man.

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[–]loneliness-incLvL 99 Rogue NiceGuy™ 9 points10 points11 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You already got a good answer from u/sllepyweaselisawake but to put his answer in other words: the very character traits that make a guy oh so hawt, are the very character traits that make him poor husband material. Conversely, the very character traits that make for a good husband, are the very character traits that make him boooooooooooooooooring. This concept is explained in the warm home analogy.

Tip further exacerbate this problem, women tend to have impassable standards, further inhibiting their chances of finding a good man.

Those who dip find a good man are still women and they still have hypergamy. Even if they remain faithful, their hypergamy is still in full operation within their marriage.

Men are walking up. Men are sick of dealing with your drama and bullshit. If you want men to piss in your direction, you'll have to change tactics. However, even then, you won't be able to bring back all men because the system itself divorces authority from responsibility.

[–]BluepillProfessorMRP Mod 8 points9 points10 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

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[–]TheLaughingMelonYour friendly neighborhood misogynist 20 points21 points22 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

If you are indeed part of such a toxic and biased community, there is little chance you will listen to me. But if you do, please hear me out. It will do you a world of good.

1) Not considering the other person is extremely narcissistic and is the easiest way to lock yourself out of any long and meaningful or even healthy relationship. Subs like those are extremely toxic and biased. They literally say things like "ignore the other person", "you are the prize" and "make them work". Then those people wonder why they are still single or always end up in one bad relationship after another.

2) If someone says, "I am so good but still I end up with bad partners" 99% of the time, it is the fault of that person. They are either in denial or too proud to consider that it maybe be something wrong with them. They need to step back and look and all these relationships and see why they have all gone wrong. What is similar between them? This is the first step to improving bad relationships.

3) In OP's case (the 36 year old Engineer with a pole-dancing room), she says she does everything but is still treated badly. Why is that? In case you haven't realised, the problem is that she is attracted to men with the dark triad traits (Narcissism, Machiavellianism and Psycopathy). In other words, she is attracted to "Alpha" men or "bad boys". These men stroke her ego and tell her what she wants to hear, so despite breakup after breakup, she still winds up with such men.

No doubt, as someone else before me already said, there are plenty of good men out there, it's just that she considers them below her or not up to her standards. That is the fault in her that she refuses to see or admit.

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[–]TheLaughingMelonYour friendly neighborhood misogynist 16 points17 points18 points 6 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]TheLaughingMelonYour friendly neighborhood misogynist 16 points17 points18 points 6 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

Guess that hypergamy is catching up to you, eh? Women always want to marry up. This is the reason educated and qualified women all over the world always find themselves single and aging - because they raise their standards too high.

Men, on the other hand, have never expected so much from their wives. If she is pretty and loving and obedient, that is good enough. If she is rich, that is an added bonus, but it is not the primary thing they look for.

If this woman is earning as much as she says she is, the husband would not even need to work at all - and if he is, how much he makes should not even be relevant to her. But I suppose you would consider such a man lazy and childish.

As for your suggestion as to not take relationship advice from men "because they don't know what they are doing" that is extremely dangerous and stupid because not mentioning or even considering the other partner's point of view is something seen only in radical incel communities.

Even if it wasn't about dating, that is still stupid advice as you are literally ignoring the very demographic you are catering to. It's like marketing something for adolescents/teenagers and then not even doing any research on said group. You don't need a Business degree to realise said product will be a compete failure.

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Comments

Correct.

Title	Ain’t this the truth!
Author	RoosterHeadBad
Upvotes	877
Comments	175
Date	January 25, 2020 10:25 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/etxp25/aint_this_the_truth/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/aint-this-the-truth.342317 https://theredarchive.com/post/342317