I’ve decided to break off my situationship. How do I remain headstrong and follow through??

ASeaOfQuotes · 2021-04-11T15:57:02+00:00

First of all, if he wanted to commit to you he already would have, so don’t make it sound like you’re giving him an ultimatum because you’re absolutely right that the chances of him just lying to you and claiming he will commit are high.

Just tell him you’re not interested in seeing him anymore, offer no explanation, you owe him nothing, he is not your boyfriend. The less explanation you provide, the more power is in your hands. Do not provide him context to then defend himself or make false promises.

If he’s pressuring you for an answer, say you have a lot on your plate, say you want to focus on yourself right now, say you’ve been busy and don’t have time to sustain anything, none of that is a lie. Whatever you do, do not give him ammunition to manipulate, gaslight, or diminish you because HE is the one who is lacking.

dollymyfolly · 2021-04-11T17:36:59+00:00

A good reason we block is to protect ourselves from exposure to anything a man might say to throw us off our resolve. Take your power back and block him.

Sea_Soil · 2021-04-12T00:19:18+00:00

When I broke up with me ex one if the reasons was us being together for nearly 4 years and no proposal. After we broke up he suddenly promised to do everything he didn't do, including marrying me. He said "I want to marry you right now! I just can't afford it!"

I called his bluff and said, "okay, you know I love you, I don't need a wedding or and expensive ring, let's go down to the courthouse today and get married".

He stuttered, and suddenly wasn't so ready.

Just remember, "If he wanted to, he would have". When a man loves you, and truly values you, he will move mountains for you, he will want exclusivity. It doesn't take you walking away for him to do those things. After you say what you want to say, block and delete him and don't look back.

berrylikeova · 2021-04-11T19:12:46+00:00

Say nothing. Block him and move on.

NotSoSmartChick · 2021-04-11T22:09:56+00:00

I vote for the block and delete. If you must say something, just say this is no longer working for you. Any reasons you give, he'll promise to fix.

FluffandRainclouds · 2021-04-12T01:01:11+00:00

Think of it this way: you never had him. And even if you did, you don't want him. It sucks but you got this!

WildTenderness · 2021-04-11T23:27:50+00:00

Do it over the phone and have a script. Anything beyond the script means you hang up. If he starts asking you why our trying to convince you not to, say goodbye and hang up the call. Don't feel bad, this is the right decision for you, his feelings are irrelevant.

Also, I heard an interesting quote today, "If he's not committed to you, he always has that ability to get up and walk away. You can't keep him accountable." Take your power back and continue dating other men. A man who is worth it won't make you question the relationship or stir up your intuition. Don't let him waste anymore of your time. I just cut off a situationship yesterday. I let it go on for a month after I told him I wanted commitment (guess who got nothing??), don't be me.

Title	I’ve decided to break off my situationship. How do I remain headstrong and follow through??
Author	avamansouri
Upvotes	59
Comments	7
Date	April 11, 2021 3:42 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askFDS
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askfds/comments/mot0bg/ive-decided-to-break-off-my-situationship-how-do-i/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askFDS/ive-decided-to-break-off-my-situationship-how-do-i.1629324 https://theredarchive.com/post/1629324

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