Lying about engagement ring

LordDunderhead · 2021-02-17T09:51:32+00:00

Wow! That's just pathetic. Honestly I would at the very least hold off the wedding for now and see if his behaviour improves.

But imo any guy that doesn't 100% want to impress you isn't the right one for you. He's already gauging how little effort he can get away with 🤧

LittleWinn · 2021-02-17T14:06:20+00:00

He regifted you a ring...lied about it....what’s to wonder about? This isn’t just a piece of jewelry it’s a symbol of his commitment to you. His commitment is not to you, and it’s fake. I wouldn’t marry anyone who did this to me. It shows that you think I’m stupid, not worth buying MY OWN RING for, and really freaking weird he would just give me his moms old ring. Like, not even an heirloom just something she bought and presumably didn’t like. Just no.

Colour_riot · 2021-02-17T13:41:52+00:00

I'd take it and walk away.... only half jk.

I mean, what he wanted to gain from lying is pretending that he put much effort (did he even pay for it?). That's not a small thing.

Talk to him, but I think you already know what to expect

redbirdflies · 2021-02-17T14:39:08+00:00

If he will lie to you about something as important as the symbol of his commitment to you, especially knowing the truth probably wouldn’t have mattered, what else is he going to lie about?

Do you want to spend the rest of your life wondering what is real and what isn’t?

ASeaOfQuotes · 2021-02-17T17:47:09+00:00

Ring aside, the dishonesty or lie by omission is the real problem here. He may have thought it was 2 carats, who knows, but he lied about the origin of the ring. He tried to make it seem more special because he knew you’d be unhappy if he said “oh my mom didn’t like this/didn’t want this, so she gave it to me for you” or whatever the situation was.

level_up_always · 2021-02-17T15:52:10+00:00

where there's smoke there's fire... most likely lying about other stuff or will in the future is this how you want to start your marriage?

EveSerpent · 2021-02-17T19:35:00+00:00

How did you find out the truth? This is an important part of the equation.

Vmwvi · 2021-02-21T02:32:01+00:00

Don't take him back, he's a complete liar. His mom bought a ring for herself, he stole it, pretended he put some thought into the gift instead of just stealing it, didn't even bother to check if it was the right diamond while stealing it, a difference of thousands of dollars or lying outright again about the diamond size, and daring to ask for the "benefit of the doubt". If he's willing to lie straight to your face, claim ignorance whenever faced with a problem and gaslight you over the engagement ring, he will most definitely do it throughout the whole marriage. Even if the story he made up is miraculously true (jeweller ripped off his mother about the ring illegally, the mother is lying about ring being for herself, he actually heard directly from his mother that she had reserved a ring for a potential daughter in law) the fact that he isn't even bothered to put thought into the ring (no remaking the ring to personalise it to you) and uses it as an excuse to be cheap is a huge red flag.

Who cares if he buys a new ring, if you forgive him, it teaches him that gaslighting works, that you'll accept lying, that you can be bought with money. If you give the benefit of the doubt now, expect to be doing it for the rest of your marriage.

warinmymind94 · 2021-02-18T09:59:40+00:00

He lied and he should have went and picked out a ring especially for you, not taken some prepicked out ring from his mother. My cousin went to several jewelers and consulted his now fiancees family and ended up custom designing a ring with her style and taste in mind. Let me add my cousin isnt even rich or anything, he's a regular blue collar dude. He consulted with the family to go over style ideas. That's the type of thing you deserve too. The lie alone was enough of an issue. You are unique and wonderful and the ring should be special, it reflects his commitment and love to you, and should also show effort.

Title	Lying about engagement ring
Author	throwaway07101
Upvotes	12
Comments	14
Date	February 17, 2021 7:26 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askFDS
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askfds/comments/llosqt/lying-about-engagement-ring/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askFDS/lying-about-engagement-ring.1629167 https://theredarchive.com/post/1629167

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