Initiation and Escalation

johneyapocalypse · 2018-05-17T23:55:58+00:00

"I used to get super whiny" = you still get super whiny.

Push through the mental barrier - the one in your own brain - and just fucking go for it. Then, don't sweat the rejection - seriously - consider it part of the process - and fucking do it.

Period.

I stayed in the zone you're talking about for a while - "going with the flow" but not really initiating much - and it didn't work.

You must make it happen.

It will be unnerving but it's a necessary part of your evolution.

2ndal · 2018-05-18T00:00:36+00:00

I had this problem and it turns out the root issue was shame. I shouldn't have these thoughts. What would she think about me if she knew what I was thinking? God, I think about sex all the time, how can I stop that? She's a woman, she needs to be coddled, I need to warm her up for sex. I can't show her the real me.

You initiate by initiating. There's nothing more to it, really.

Remove the blue filter that exists between your brain and your actions. Like the way her ass cheek is hanging out of her pajama shorts as she sits on the couch? Don't just look at it like a dweeb and try to push away your attraction. Slide your hand on it and give her a kiss.

Are you horny? Grab her from behind and kiss her neck in a way that says "I want to fuck you, now." Or make it even easier and say "I want to fuck you, now" while you do it.

Mix it up. Make it playful sometimes, make it serious sometimes.

Quit thinking so much. Quit trying to devise the perfect method. Quit trying to smooth talk or masterfully escalate like Don Juan. Those things will come more naturally with time. For now, when you are attracted and you want to fuck, make it known in whatever way you choose and then take action.

SteelToeShitKicker · 2018-05-18T03:48:03+00:00

Back when my wife wasn't all fucked up from the c-section, I'd throw her ass over my shoulder bring her into the bedroom and throw her on the bed. You said you have been lifting. Be careful with the head around door frames and bedposts.

You are thinking too much. You are seeking approval too much.

Take what you want.

youscum · 2018-05-18T01:19:00+00:00

I find kino to be a great tool for "prediciting the weather". If my wife is cold and distant to my kino (not smirking or leaning in to my touches), there's a high probability of getting "I'm not in the mood" with a slight chance of pity starfish sex. Predicting the weather, so to speak, allows me to accept the rejection before it even happens. Which makes it A LOT easier to deal with. And sometimes if I predict a rejection on the horizon, I won't even bother escalating and will go do something else. Your time is valuable. If she isn't giving you any buying signals, do you really want to waste your time with her?

Now if she is responsive (i.e. smirks when you grab her ass, closes her eyes or tilts her head back when you rub the small of her back, etc)...these are signals of clear skies ahead. The other day my wife grabbed my ass while passing me in the kitchen (she kino's me back frequently now), so I knew how easy she was going to be and that's exactly when I followed her upstairs and banged her from behind in front of the bathroom mirror in the middle of the day with the kids awake and making noise in the next room.

Kino is not a tool to only utilize when you want to get laid though. You should be doing it all the time. Sometimes be sweet with it, sometimes be crude and dirty. Switch it up. Be unpredictable. See what happens.

redpillrobert · 2018-05-18T00:33:04+00:00

i've never had problems with my marriage (it's not why i came here initially), but something i've noticed is that when i'm really humming along in my life (meaning everything is really on point and/or i'm spinning several plates) i never need to initiate

i know it's touted like a cold hard fact here that it's a man's job to initiate and you just have to do it even if you get rejected, but i tend to think that if i'm feeling the need to snap HER out of HER groove in order to have sex with ME instead of the other way around, it usually means i'm getting soft

FF0000_captain · 2018-05-18T00:47:48+00:00

Stop sitting on the couch watching TV, for starters. Find other more interesting things to do together that make you the center of attention and provider of feelz. Or just initiate before screen time. Once the great distraction machines get revved up it can be hard to switch focus to something else. And it’s a lot more relaxing to veg out AFTER you’ve fucked each other’s brains out.

red-sfpplus · 2018-05-18T00:49:02+00:00

If you have read the entire sidebar you would have read book like Pook and know what DEVI is.

So fo back and get out of the beginner section of the sidebar.

Dont ask us to do the work for you when it is literally there.

88Will88 · 2018-05-18T04:40:21+00:00

If she doesn’t want to fuck you then go out and fuck someone else, problem solved.

Title	Initiation and Escalation
Author	OhmsLawz
Upvotes	9
Comments	24
Date	May 17, 2018 11:51 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/8k8vvm/initiation_and_escalation/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/initiation-and-escalation.204480 https://theredarchive.com/post/204480

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