Hey guys, newbie here. I'm coming back to the RP basics after being out of the community for a while. I've decided the biggest gap I have today is my frame. I've been studying the pyramid framework as outlined by /u/strategos_autokrator to improve. By far the area I do the worst with is the emotional one.

I've often seen posts about being outcome indifferent with sexual initiation. Due to my weak frame, I realize, I have a lot of trouble staying indifferent in the face of rejection. Another big issue for me is sexual frequency over the week- I can get very hung up on the numbers. My marriage has been low-sex for a very, very long time. Things have gotten better in the last couple of months- and as a result find myself thinking and worrying about making sure we stay at a set frequency. When it goes south I can become overly discouraged. I guess most of us have been here at some point.

These things are on me- I know the solution is to improve my frame (and particularly the emotional side) so I can grow past this, and start getting the results I want instead of just wishing for them. But although I know the end result, I don't know the means to get there. How did you / are you doing it?

What I am doing:

  • 20 minutes of meditation a day (to sharpen and clear my mind and emotions)
  • 4x days lifting at the gym. Already fit but going to the next level now.
  • Reading the sidebar and doing all of the usual prereqs. Have gone through about half of the books.
  • Practicing telling zero lies (my chosen method of destroying my tendencies to create covert contracts)

Thanks EDIT: Maybe one thing I'm doing "wrong" is by having a set goal for sex frequency. My goal is to have regular sex, 2-3x/week. I.e. is setting such a goal and tracking the numbers where the problem is in itself? I've often questioned myself on this point- but I always come back to the issue that if I don't track the numbers, it's all too easy for things to slide back to shitty-land.