So my wife's all-time favorite shit-test is asking/responding with "why are mad/angry/crabby/grumpy?" Now, there are times when she is definitely picking up on my actual mood, and I realize there are frame issues I need to fix. However, she asks that at other times where it is a definite shit-test (50-75%of the time).

My response has usually been no or some other negative response, occasionally with a joking "I'm furiously mad", to which she usually responds with repeating the accusation, "well, you just seem mad", and then we just broken record each other 2-4 times each.

So, I ask the sages of askMRP/MRP, is there a better approach/response?