Wedding toast

midlifedick · 2016-04-26T00:20:30+00:00

Don't be an asshole. Just give em what they came for.

Bride looks beautiful. Groom used to be crazy, amusing anecdote( farther in the past the better) we're good friends and I'm happy for him. Drink.

bogeyd6 · 2016-04-26T18:42:10+00:00

First of all, I wanna thank God for giving everybody so much, and me, so little. I hate you, I hate you, and I don't even know you and I hate your guts. I hope all the bad things in life happen to you, and nobody else, but you. And as I stand here sippin' the beer that I'm sure somebody spit in, I just wanna say yall can kiss my ass you rotten motha-fuckas. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go home and put some water in RPNoober's momma's dish. Good evenin'!

TheThirdT · 2016-04-26T12:36:30+00:00

Your friend has asked you to play a part in his wedding. The wedding and toast is not about you. If you cannot accept this then decline. Otherwise, try to be the best friend you can to your friend and come up with a toast appropriate for the venue.

Gogo4u · 2016-04-25T19:37:47+00:00

It's your friend's wedding.

Beta or not, it's his day to be honored and congratulated. Not your day to sneak in some RP snark.

ColumbusCrewFan · 2016-04-25T19:58:42+00:00

OP, you've asked a good question. Keep it funny but not at the expense of making the groom look like a bumbling loser or a fool (you do that stuff when it's all guy friends together). Don't say stuff about how lucky he is to have her. I have heard too much of this stuff at Wedding toasts and it was really embarrassing.

il-est-ressuscite · 2016-04-25T19:41:22+00:00

Got so many friends do ya that you can throw 'em away huh? Based on this question I doubt it.

BluepillProfessor · 2016-04-26T16:08:13+00:00

I always like Data's Speech in the Ensigns of Command slightly modified for marriage:

I admire your conviction in the face of certain defeat. Your effort will be valiant, though doomed. Still, when you die, you will die for love, and land and honor.

 Your children will understand that you died for a worthy cause. Long after the battle is over, your courage will be remembered and extolled. Remembered by who? DATA (as if he hadn't considered that) Ah, that is true. There will not be enough love left alive to remember.....

Title	Wedding toast
Author	RPNoober
Upvotes	1
Comments	44
Date	April 25, 2016 7:25 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/4gey9b/wedding_toast/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/wedding-toast.207468 https://theredarchive.com/post/207468

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