Why no texting?

stonepimpletilists · 2016-03-25T22:15:03+00:00

Hey faggot, stop being a douche.

Am I joking or angry?

text isn't for feelings

druganswer · 2016-03-26T00:57:13+00:00

there is no mystery if a female knows exactly what you're doing all the time... give her some time to miss you and give yourself some time to miss her.

Riding_Officer_CCI · 2016-03-26T05:42:57+00:00

When starting out on the Path, it's real likely that a male is chasing his wife about, both physically and emotionally, desperate for her validation and approval, and desperate to do anything which compromises the same- I.e being clingy as fuck.

Anything that is not logistics is her ringing an 'attention bell,' to see if you will respond- Think of it like a really lazy, low cost way she can check that your balls are still in her purse, a tug on the dog lead, if you will.

An attractive man hasn't got time for that shit, so doesn't tolerate it. Her lizard brain knows that, but her woman brain gets a wee dopamine hit when she gets a reaction. Know how Athol says the fastest way to become more attractive is to kill those things making you unnatractive?

That's why the rule is there, because a lot of men starting out have been conditioned to react to their woman's emotions via a tiny little machine in their hands- a trait which is ugly as fuck and needs to be killed.

jacktenofhearts · 2016-03-26T08:24:34+00:00

To add some level of detail to the other comments here...

We talk about "gaming your wife throughout the day" and not turning sex into this binary "on/off" activity. I've used the term blurring the lines of sexuality before for this, but it's all the same concept. If your interactions with her have this flirtatious, teasing, and implicitly sexual tone, then you're a lot more likely to have an frequent and enthusiastic sex life because it's just sort of interwoven into all the things you're doing anyway.

So, some of these MRP 2-Week Warriors will think that's really good advice and rush to apply it. Game my wife all day! I can do that! But, most of us work during the day at a job, so we don't actually see our wives for several hours. How are you supposed to game your wife when you don't actually see her? Oh, I'll send her some flirty texts! Telecommuting my flirtations! Now that's some 21st Century New Economy brilliance!

Yeah, but, no. If you heretofore had little to no "game" in general, then why would you think you'd be any good at text game? Most guys on MRP are already half-autistic retards who constantly miss social cues from everyone, or over-anxious codependent retards who never miss social cues from everyone, to the point of over-interpreting said social cues and reading way too much into shit that isn't there. Now, for either of these archetypes that already struggle with human-to-human communication, give them a communication channel that strips away all auditory, tactile, and visual cues except for the raw text. Is that going to work well for most guys?

If you're a Texting Don Juan, or otherwise have a good "text rapport" with your wife and others, then you can disregard this. If sending your wife a bunch of cute emojis gets her to drop her panties when you get home, then good for you. But for all the men who come to MRP and said, I texted my wife some flirty stuff and she shot it down, the solution isn't to get better at texting flirty stuff. The solution is to get better at saying flirty stuff, and then extend that to text later on.

I suppose there's the rare case of a guy whose wife is very receptive to verbal flirting but reacts poorly to text flirting, but I've yet to see that specific problem on MRP.

The canonical Red Pill advice to a marriage where your wife doesn't seem to care if she's adding value in your life, is to gradually withdraw your attention from her -- and by proxy, the value that you add to hers. I can't recall this exact anecdote to find the post, but there was a guy on MRP who used to get up early every morning and make his kids lunches and make his wife a smoothie for breakfast. So, he tried to initiate sex with his wife one morning, she shot him down in an especially harsh manner, and he decided he was done with the whole smoothie thing.

And she reacted pretty badly, mostly because it was so fucking obvious that this was not a "gradual withdrawal of attention" but a vindictive response to a clear lack of Outcome Independence. So as the guy described it, his wife give him the predictable oh, so if I don't let you fuck me, you act like an asshole? Shit Test, and according to him he just STFU and went to work. Then in the afternoon she texted him a huge novel of Shit Test about what an inconsiderate asshole he was. So he got defensive, and said things like, "all this over a smoothie?" and that just brought another torrent of Shit Tests on him.

And the reason that guy also gets the "text for logistics only" is because any response is bringing a knife to his gun fight. The things MRP advocates, such as setting boundaries and killing covert contracts, will probably make your marriage seem cosmetically worse before it gets better. This is especially true if you were dropping the ball in other areas in your marriage, leading to your wife harboring covert resentment of you.

So that example MRP post I've been referring to, you could see how this guy's wife was used to a husband that was mostly useless, but at least operated in her frame without too much resistance. But now he's resisting her frame -- and if that happens while her opinion of him is that he's still useless, then she will react poorly. My husband always did what I said, even if he fucked it up half the time. Now he's acting like he's too good to listen to me? Him, the guy who can't even bring home the right kind of ground beef from the supermarket? How fucking inconsiderate is this asshole anyway?

So it's pretty common that unplugging guys get in some sort of similar fight with their wives, and end up getting a novel of a text communicating, essentially, that. It's usually the product of a wife who's been frustrated and resentful all day, and invested a massive amount of effort to make sure you know just how frustrated and resentful she is. So any time you get a text like that, your inclination is to respond and defend yourself, but you can't win that game. The way to pass that Shit Test is to get a certain message across -- such as you don't have to fuck me, but I don't have to make you a smoothie every morning, and acting angry and entitled to either is poor behavior -- and it's basically impossible to do that via text in the best of circumstances. Let alone in a response to your wife sending you some bullshit after her hamster has been running wild that whole day.

Like much of the advice in MRP, a rule like "texting is for logistical purposes only" is akin to "stop playing with fire if you don't want to get burned." It is certainly possible to be skilled and deft enough to play with fire to perform fun pyrotechnics and ignite interesting chemical reactions. But if you need advice from internet strangers on how to do this, you probably shouldn't be trying to do it to begin with.

RedDreadWolverine · 2016-03-25T23:20:54+00:00

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZVIzZgwokgA

TheFamilyAlpha · 2016-03-26T12:50:24+00:00

Text game is advanced, not many can do it, therefore it's not recommended to the masses.

If you can do it right, do it. I've had the Mrs. Tell me she was wet from a proper timed photo and the right words to go with it.

If you can build up through the day by texting not too little or too much then again, go for it.

All of the advice given are guidelines, you make the rules in your life.

RedDreadWolverine · 2016-03-25T21:20:51+00:00

Mostly because it's lazy to try to have serious discussions via text and makes you look weak. Also because silence is golden remember ACTA non verba

ParadoxThatDrivesUs · 2016-03-25T21:49:47+00:00

Logistics or gaming. I'd argue it's just a special case of a more general rule, which is that you should think long and hard about any communication at all that isn't logistics or gaming.

ClubLowlow · 2016-03-26T00:59:18+00:00

I don't know gang I'm still unconvinced. 98% of the stuff I see on MRP resonates with me strongly based on all my past experiences with women, but I need more convincing on this one. To me, texting is a superior form of communication over the phone call, because the recipient doesn't have to drop what they are doing to communicate with you.

Title	Why no texting?
Author	ClubLowlow
Upvotes	6
Comments	30
Date	March 25, 2016 8:42 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/4byapr/why_no_texting/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/why-no-texting.207564 https://theredarchive.com/post/207564

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