Anyone else suffered from retroactive jealousy. Help a brother out.

W_O_M_B_A_T · 2019-07-30T03:21:39+00:00

She's not yours, kiddo, it's just your turn this week, this month. AWALT.

It's not about you. Having sex with her doesn't make you special.

Cods_gift_to_reddit · 2019-07-30T10:08:43+00:00

Trust your gut, if you're jealous it's because she's likely not seen enough alpha behaviour from you yet to fully eradicate memories of her ex's.

You're not satisfying her desire to be sexually dominated yet and both of you know it subconsciously.

My advice; pin her down, tie her to the bed and fuck her hard while pushing her face into the pillow. Do this as a kind of ceremony for yourself to 'fuck her ex's out of her'. Imagine her exes watching you and being intimidated by how strongly you are fucking her, how you are laying new ownership to her. Marking your territory. Make their memories scared and wimper in the wake of your fucking.

Guarenteed your jealousy will go permanently and she will be yours. You'll be able to sense the change in atmosphere and there'll be a glow over your relationship. Any jealousy pops up again in the future just fuck her like this again.

Don't ask her when you do this, just escalate and do it one night.

majuman · 2019-07-30T07:06:11+00:00

Retroactive jealousy - RJ is not normal!

Sexual jealousy can be normal. The difference between Sj and RJ are the recurring and repeating thoughts of your partner getting dicked down by her sexual past. More or less an obsessive feedback loop.

Its an rare form of ocd. Its goes like this.

Thoughts arrising -> reassurance seeking -> short term you forget about it -> thoughts arrising.

Im a sufferer as well but got it quite good under control with cognitive behavioural theraphy.

For starters whenever these thoughts arise dont dig into them, dont entertain them. Just say in your mind :"its just a thought" and continue doing what youre doing. This should take the edge of in about a week. Rewire your brain that there is no danger in your girls past.

Dont talk about it with her. Dont talk about their past.

Im at that point where in my ltr where i have to decide if my RJ is bothering me or her n count in terms of ltr quality.

Fight it until its not obsessive anymore. Godspeed. - maju

lugrulo · 2019-07-30T03:19:13+00:00

This really has nothing to do with her, or relationships but is essentially an overthinking issue. You probably do this in other aspects of your life as well, and may not even realize it.

Your suffering is coming from focusing on that specific point, which causes you anxiety and leads you to ruminate further. Break the cycle by not actively analyzing the situation, even with initial discomfort. It may take a while but your anxiety will slowly fade.

LifeTopic · 2019-07-30T03:20:47+00:00

Meditate. There's nothing you can do that she fucked other guys. You can only control your reaction. Just sit there. Keep your eyes open, focus in on a random object. Control your breathing. Now let your thoughts run wild, imagine chad cumming in her mouth. Imagine all these fucked up images. Feel your heart racing? Well carry on. Keep meditating. Eventually your thoughts will run out, you'll feel a sense of peace.

Then you decide if you want to stay with her or not.

FereallyRed · 2019-07-30T03:46:53+00:00

You mom probably had 20 cocks in her before you were squeezed out of that very vagina. You sister has sex too. Your girl probably has had bigger and better lovers than you.

You're the prize. She's with you.

It's just sex.

What's the exact problem you have about nonvirgins?

zxcvb7809 · 2019-07-30T08:35:11+00:00

Have enough plates to where one is not more valuable than the principle of the game, playa.

mchief101 · 2019-07-30T22:29:43+00:00

i used to be like this and over time whenever thoughts like that come up, i just block it out immediately. Over time, you won't care anymore because hey you can fuck other girls to. Focus on your own shit and go to the gym, i think that these things are more important than sex. In life, there are more important things than sex.

thrwy75479 · 2019-07-30T03:50:15+00:00

Sexual jealousy is normal.

You probably fear that she'll cheat. This may be because you feel that she can attract, and keep guys with higher SMV than you. In your case, it may be important because, subconsciously or not, you don't want to end up raising another man's baby if she does happen to be unfaithful.

There are different ways of handling it. A dark approach is to find ways to get her to stop going out as much, and slowly cut her off from her friends, maybe get her to gain weight. You can also lower her self-esteem by making cutting remarks. All this will literally reduce her options. Of course, it is overly controlling, and manipulative.

An inner approach is to accept that there will always be someone better. Sometimes you'll be able to learn from him, and improve yourself. Other times, that may not be possible. Also, unless you're following her around everyone second of the day, if she wants to cheat, she'll cheat, so it's out of your control. Without any action, this is probably too passive though.

The best thing to do is to trust but verify. If she's saying she's going to X place, at Y time, confirm that she's actually there by perhaps asking her to pick something up while she's there. Be aware of her whereabouts, and keep an eye out for suspicious behaviour. Do not ascribe intent, rather, inquire about anything you find odd, before forming a judgment.

Basically, be all up in her business but don't make it look like you're all up in her business. As you get more affirmative responses, it will help you build more trust, and reduce your anxiety.

H_Crush · 2019-07-30T07:43:07+00:00

Have other goals, more important stuff in your life. She's there only to fulfill needs. You are enjoying her in the present moment, that's all that's important. Don't marry her. Would be good if you could make it an oltr.

Title	Anyone else suffered from retroactive jealousy. Help a brother out.
Author	ThrowayButNvrForgten
Upvotes	9
Comments	40
Date	July 30, 2019 3:03 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/cjlrbn/anyone_else_suffered_from_retroactive_jealousy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/anyone-else-suffered-from-retroactive-jealousy.247403 https://theredarchive.com/post/247403

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