I’ve had this problem twice where I bring a chick back to my place, I’m escalating, but we don’t go all the way. Why does this happen and how can I deal with it?

mismm · 2019-04-03T02:53:47+00:00

There's a quick solution to this: do not bring any girl to your bed unless there is a clear subcontext that you are going there to fuck. What means is do all physical escalation somewhere else, couch or whatever. Put her hand on your cock, touch her pussy, then move to the bed.

If she gives you resistance in her pants, withdrawal completely and go back to doing what you were doing (movie, drink, whatever). She might reinitiate and if she doesn't try again a few minutes later.

Bed = sex

vafka · 2019-04-03T02:50:04+00:00

No more ice cream for the chubs!

FereallyRed · 2019-04-03T06:27:07+00:00

Push/pull.

Give and withdraw attention. reward good behavior, punish bad behavior.

Of course, sometimes the juice just isn't worth the squeeze.

recursoinominado · 2019-04-03T02:45:33+00:00

Girls to that shit, it's called Last Minute Resistance (LMR), sometimes you do everything right but she will froze for whatever reason (usually fear of being judged, anti-slut defense). In my experience, game is what you need, build up attraction, make her super wet with your frame, teasing, kissing and pulling back, don't go all the way at first, hot and cold, you kiss her hard and sexy and stop right after like nothing happened, Women love that shit, you have to engage her emotinaly to the point that shut down her logical mind

imdownwithtrp · 2019-04-03T05:04:24+00:00

You be the one that pulls away first. Wait for her to come back to you. You giveth. You taketh away. Remember you're the prize. The more you do that she'll be begging for more and she'll be the one initiating.

MeatMetal · 2019-04-03T02:11:47+00:00

Good luck with this man

greenpill999 · 2019-04-03T02:26:29+00:00

Nothing strange with this. Read posts from CainPrice, there’s one about third dates if I remember correctly. Also get them to touch your dick before undressing them.

ThinSpiritual · 2019-04-03T06:25:53+00:00

Not your fault. Some are indeed uncomfortable with "1st-time-bang".

While TRP is correct is preaching organic attraction but how that theory applies in reality differs on a case-by-case basis.

Some girls are uncomfortable with their own sexuality, nothing wrong with that.

It's an odds game, you just have to keep playing. I've had dry periods of weeks followed up with 3 closes in 1 weekend. I would've preferred my fucking schedule to be more spread out too.

ivyentre · 2019-04-03T06:28:17+00:00

You didn't do anything wrong. There was no mistake in your comfort building, nothing wrong with you if you got her to this point. If there were, she wouldn't have gone with far with you as she did.

You can't read her mind and know why she left, and honestly, it doesn't matter. She didn't choose you for any number of reasons, which may or may not have ANYTHING to do with you personally.

When you reach the point of no return, be it sales, sex, whatever, that is the point where a decision is REALLY made if it hasn't been made already. And at that point, she's either going to fuck you or she isnt, pure and simple. If she opts against, the worst thing you can do is show frustration of any kind. Just take it for what it is and maybe she'll change her mind, maybe she won't.

Don't doubt yourself, though. The way I see it and hope you do too, you've done well just to get two girls back to your place and into your bed, so you aren't in as bad shape as you think.

Sero-Flex · 2019-04-03T03:44:56+00:00

Similar thing happened to me with a girl I brought home, only I ended up fucking her that night. We get to my house, put on a movie, start making out on my couch in my room. After making out for a few minutes I started rubbing her pussy through her leggings and after a minute she tells me to stop. I stopped and asked her if she still wanted to make out, (I think some people on this sub would say me asking that was a fuck up, but I did end up smashing so do with that what you will) she says yes so we keep making out, cuddling and watching the movie. After like 30 min I asked her if she wanted to cuddle in my bed because I was cold and there was a blanket, (which was right behind my couch) she said yes so there we go. We keep talking, cuddling, making out, and watching the movie. At one point she gets up to do these yoga stretches, I ask why. She says she has scoliosis (spine isn’t curved right). I tell her to show me her back, she lays down in my bed on her stomach and lifts the back of her shirt up to show me. I ask if she wants a massage, (stroke of genius on my part, I know /s) she says yes, so I start rubbing her back. After a minute I move to sit on her ass so I can get better pressure and I ask if I can undo her bra strap because it’s getting in the way (again, some people might take issue with me even asking instead of just going for it, but it worked out just fine for me). She says yes, I undo the clip, keep rubbing her back, and I hear her moaning really quietly in the pillow, so I keep going harder and she eventually tells me I can stop. I get off of her and she sits up, leaving her bra on my bed, titties right in my face. We start making out aggressively, she goes for my dick, and I’m in there like swimwear, easy as that. Sorry if that was TMI, just thought drawing parallels between our situations might be helpful to you. Now, regarding your situation, my gut instinct is you might’ve gone for her pussy too fast (as you just read, I made the same mistake, but I redeemed myself with the massage). Might want to let the next girl warmup for a while longer next time. Also, not sure if biting titties is the move. Might want to work on your foreplay game (unless biting titties is the new shit I’m not up on at the moment). Lmk if you have any other questions. Good luck brother.

deepfunXOXO · 2019-04-03T09:16:52+00:00

She was on her period.

GisforJumping · 2019-04-03T12:33:29+00:00

There’s a lot of vague answers on here so maybe this will help: First kiss, spend some time kissing. Work your way to her neck, shoulders, tits. You’re fine here. Any explored territory is fair game. Once you get to the tits, you don’t keep going down to the pants, you explore all of the “explores territory” again and again. That means go back up to the neck, shoulders. I’m sure you’re already doing this. If she blocks you at the tits, start over from the beginning escalating from the kiss. If she stops you at the pants, start over at the kiss, uncover each territory from scratch again. Just expect this will happen 1-5 times.

If she wants to “stop” to tell you something like “I just can’t duck you tonight”, remove ALL physical touch and look at her casually like you don’t mind, cuz you’re just here for the makeout/sensuality not sex. Say “it’s fine” without being butthurt, kinda deadpan expression. Just lay there not touching her until she starts touching you again.

After all that warmth and sensuality she will feel empty and cold due to the withdrawal. You will feel it too, but at all costs do Not touch her first. PUAs will suggest going to another room and on the computer or phone but I’ve never actually done this lol. She will start touching you trying to rekindle the moment. At that point start over with the kiss.

If she still has LMR after all that, she’ll probably leave, never give her a ride. Tell her you have to go to sleep, and to call an uber.

Good job playing it cool to the “r u mad” texts. I’d jerk off before replying if you want to see them again.

Alejandroses · 2019-04-03T17:11:14+00:00

Most of the time right before it gets to the serious part of sex the girl will have second thoughts. Its their last defense before they get their guts re-arranged.

Personally I always ignore the first "no" and fire with some sarcasm. Sometimes they say "no" but they really want you to do it. Say im going to eat her out

"I dont know how I feel about that"
*me still making my way down*: "You will in a few minutes."

And if they stop me again then I will back up. Usually they don't stop you though, I think they just want to know FOR SURE that youre not just some perv and shit. Their last "check" to see if you are worth giving the pussy up to lol

vpnikolov · 2019-04-03T08:39:19+00:00

Could be one of many reasons. I recently had dinner with one at my place, while we were making out on the couch she told me that she was sexually abused a while back and wants to take it slow. All fine and dandy, we ended up in my bed and with a confident approach by me she ended up completely naked, but we stopped after the foreplay. Never managed to tap that, but probably it was for the best. We are no longer in touch.

Don't be harsh on yourself, we can't get them all, no matter how hard we try!

NEXT!

INNASKILLZ2K18 · 2019-04-03T13:22:12+00:00

Try push pull, as has been suggested. You kino for a while, then pull back. You kiss, but you are the first one to pull away. You can even go in for a kiss, but pull out. Keep pulling back and going back to conversation.

This sometimes confuses them. Makes them wonder if you're going to 'go for it' or not.

I've also had a few times, when I've been direct. If I experience LMR, or the 'I don't want to fuck, I don't know you that well' shit, I'll keep kino and say;

'Fuck you're turning me on. I really don't want to sit here frustrated and angry. I understand that you want to take it slow. We don't have to fuck, but like I say I don't want to be frustrated, so put your hand here' *put her hand on my cock*.

If she tries more LMR, I then say 'Ok, like I said I don't want to be frustrated, and we don't have to fuck. But if you're comfortable doing anything, then you're free to leave'.

Get their hamster running. 'Will he kick me out? Should I stay? Should I go?' She either upholds the ASD and leaves, or stays and maintains my attention.

Often, she'll end up doing something, like suck my dick.

That way I've held my frame, I've established some dominance, moved past the ASD. Then next time she pretty much knows sex is going to happen.

Psychological_Radish · 2019-04-03T04:11:38+00:00

I’m escalating, but we don’t go all the way.

She either isn't that into you, or you're giving off Beta vibes. Probably a combination of both. Whatever the case, I'm not a fan of trying to bypass ASD or LMR. If a girl isn't eager to hop on my cock then I'm not interested. Ain't nobody got time for that.

We sit down somewhere and we begin to make out. Groping a bit. I then offer to go back to my place, and she says sure.

Some PUAs might disagree, but I find it works better if you save kissing her for when you're already back at your place. Up until the kiss, she isn't sure if you're into her. Kissing defuses the sexual tension, so it's best to initiate that when sex is a fait accompli.

the guy is obviously doing something wrong

Maybe, but maybe not. Some girls just won't be into you enough to want to bang you on the first date. They save that for guys that really arouse them, and you don't for whatever reason. That isn't something to be concerned about. Move on.

That said, my guess is you could benefit from tighter Game.

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