Her sexual background:
How we met:
I am 31 and she is 27. We met each other four months ago. During that time I had a plate, so I had no problem to wait for sex. She said to me that she waits several dates for the first sex and that she likes men who can wait. Seven weeks later we had first time sex.
Her sexual background:
13 years old: She lost virginity to a punk from the street. He was 23 years old.
16 years old: She had an one year relationship with a 26 year old male. She considers herself prude in general, but he was the first and currently last she did Anal. She broke up with him.
(She didn’t fall in love with both of them. Her parents had conflicts with each other when she was very young. Therefore, she is emotionally distant).
19 years old: Three months with a guy, but she broke up because she did not fall in love.
(She concluded that she was some kind of monster, so she wants only to have sex with monsters. She didn’t want to hurt men who fall in love with her).
21 years old: Met one guy to have sex with him. She had sex with him three times although she was already disgusted the first time. She felt more empty than before.
22 years old: Met another guy. She wanted to try a relationship, but started to have sex with him on the second date. The relationship escalated into sex, so she dropped him after the fifth date. She was disgusted again.
25 years old: A one year relationship with one guy. He waited five weeks for the first time sex. He dropped her after one year. She says that he would have dropped her earlier if he knew she could not fall in love.
27 years old: Now its my turn. She is willing to try things out she never did before and does it. She also wants to try Anal again.
Her behavior towards me: She is afraid of me (“you are not a nice guy like the others”) and has a great fear of loss.
I have told her that I am disappointed: I thought she waited always a few weeks before sex. I also said that I would have never dated her in the first place because she respects such men, but doesn’t do it herself. But I didn’t know and now I have already developed emotions towards her.
From a technical viewpoint she had only six guys in 14 years (she started early), so there are only 0.42 / year, which is a good ratio. But still, I feel massive betrayal and some disgust. I don’t know what to do. Sometimes I am fine with it, but sometimes I just want to leave her. I am very frank with her and when I tell her about that she immediately begins to whine, tells me that I am the only one she told the truth, that I am her first real relationship.
What would you do? Please help me out. If you need more info, just ask.
UPDATE
I have just talked with her. I asked her why she had sex three times with one guy and four times with the other IF after the first time she found it disgusting.
The answer is so crazy that I wish she said that she was simply horny.
She said: "During that time I smoked a lot of weed. Weed makes you dumb." I said: "But four times ... it cant make you dumb enough to not say no each time". She said: "I could not say no." (!!!!!)
I said that she is worse than a whore because whores at least take money - she is some kind of slave.
This really fucked me up big time. Then we continued.
I asked her if she was honest about her sexual past. It’s the last chance:
“There was another guy when I was 22. He had already a child.” I asked her if she fucked him on the first date: “Yes, but we chatted before we met.” (we chatted btw. also before the first date, but still no sex on the first date).
Then she told me that the boyfriend of her mother came into her room when she was 12 years old and touched her. She noticed it but did nothing against it. She got horny and didnt interrupt him. Later she was ashamed of it.
THAT WAS FUCKING IT. I COULDN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE. I dropped her like a hot potato. I told her that she will never meet such a guy like me again.
What disappointed me the most? The dishonesty. She always added new ones to her list and said “I was afraid that you break up with me so I didn’t tell you … nobody expected honesty from me”.
The fucking thing is that I am still in Love, but I have to save my dignity.
CONCLUSION
I think the most wise thing to do is to go the middle- way:
- Get rid of oneitis.
- Dont break up.
- Use them! ... until they proof themself. Thats the most realistic approach. 1 and 2 are too idealistic because maybe no woman is worth of 1 and maybe every woman should face 2 immediately. Its the MGTOW way. I think 3 is most RedPill.
What I would also say: Do what they do. If you find a better alternative dont be hesitant to leave her. Do the plate thing. Never be emotionally exclusive. You are the price, you decide the path of the relationship.
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