Why the fuck do I feel guilty?

VasiliyZaitzev · 2016-07-29T04:12:11+00:00

Why the fuck do I feel guilty?

That's the blue pill in you...dying.

bigtuna45 · 2016-07-29T02:00:37+00:00

Aside from programming, it could be hormonal. Having sex with someone releases oxycotin; the "love" hormone. This is meant to bond you with the woman. Perhaps because of that you feel like you owe her something or like you should be "nice". Just know that this is at play and will subside.

And remember - they want promiscuous sex just as much as we do.

DarkisKnight · 2016-07-29T01:38:53+00:00

Unless your intentionally giving the wrong impression to get laid, you're doing nothing wrong. That's just residual programming. You're de-programming. It's normal. Nothing to worry about. Carry on.

SovereignWings · 2016-07-29T02:00:48+00:00

I feel you on this one man.

Most recently, my issue is hanging out with plates but continuing to work the crowd / generate interest. My instincts scream at me to "be polite and kind" to the girl I'm chilling with but all I want to do is flirt with the hottie over here. It's a gray area that will require some fine tuning.

You aren't doing anything wrong. There is no "right or wrong", remember? Sexual strategy is amoral.

Decide what is right for you. I lean towards open disclosure and honesty, but that might change over time, as it is costly. Ruins mystery and leads to avoidable loss of attraction. If a wee lie keeps her loins burning then what the fuck ever I don't care anymore.

balalasaurus · 2016-07-29T04:40:38+00:00

TRP gives you the tools to maximize your potential and do what is ultimately in your best interest. It is sexual strategy that applies to all aspects of life.

From what you've written here, it seems that you still haven't quite grasped that concept. Others will tell you that this is part of the program and you're simply beginning to separate yourself from reality but this I disagree.

Without trying to get into a discussion of morality, you don't have to be an asshole to be redpilled. That's often what is lost to a lot of people here, and is primarily (IMO) the reason why we get such a bad rap. Just as it may be the case that you may be suffering residual blue, it may also be the case that you're still yet to find your real identity within a red pill framework.

Take some time to meditate on this. The more you are self-aware, the more you can identify what your best interests are and the better placed you will be to use the sexual strategy found herein.

ponkyol · 2016-07-29T09:27:27+00:00

This is a billion years of evolution telling you to take care of her and your offspring. It's a relic.

There are lots of men who'd love to have her as a gf and treat her right - if she really wanted a relationship, she'd be in one.

Frigzy · 2016-07-29T09:19:58+00:00

Hey man, I'm in the same boat as you. I believe the guilt hasn't got anything to do with sexual strategy or sex on its own.

Sex is sex. Imagine the date was rather shit because you didn't quite like her, yet you would still have had sex. Would you feel guilty afterwards for taking your chances with other girls? Fuck no. You know you have no emotional interest in that person, so you there's nothing to respect.

Guilt is an emotion. It's only coming up because you feel emotionally connected to someone. You feel that by chasing other girls, you are disrespecting that connection. That is where the guilt stems from.

However, whether or not you are truly disrespecting that emotional connection depends on how you view your reality.

If you argue that your ability to have meaningful emotional connections is limited to a few, or even just a single girl, then yes, it makes a lot of sense to feel guilty for striving to invest into others while you are already in a connection with another girl because you are depleting the emotional currency you have already used for a one time only transaction to invest it in another. This mindset (most congruent with bluepill on this subreddit) has its merits. It's very simple and it allows you to be comfortable when staying with one girl because of a moral and emotional self-limitation. However, because of the immense emotional investment you have with the girl, she will merge with your sense of moral and emotional self worth. In other words, she will have emotional power over you. As long as you are not completely trusting of her, this can easily backfire. This is why so many people who come to the redpill have an angerphase. They created their own archenemy by projecting their moral and emotional sense of self worth onto a single girl. Think of it as a gift. Here, your emotional connection with a girl is a one at the time gift, making it extremely fragile and precious. To you at least. Giving it is no guarantee that the receiver treats it well.

The other option is to argue that you have a near infinite capacity to have emotional connections with women (and people in general) and that there is no limit. This is a way more stable and self centered approach, and to be honest it is simply more healthy as you do not let your emotional wellbeing depend on others. This also means that the romantic notion of losing yourself in another person (by projecting your own wellbeing onto her) is not an option. That does not mean there can not be love, it just means that the love will stay within boundaries, always seperate from your self love and personal emotional wellbeing. However that is also what enables you to stay emotionally independent and capable of giving without becoming depleted.

Like others have said, you could describe it as the bluepill dying, but I'd say it should be more than that. It should be you grabbing a hold of yourself and your responsibility for your own emotional wellbeing and stability. Put yourself in the first place, always, and view your emotional investment as one gift of many that you feel the other person deserves. However this time, you do not expect anything in return. Start learning how to ruly love and respect yourself and to give without expectations. The better you become at this, the better your chances will become with women because they sense a strong and independent person sharing their emotional resources without any trace of expectation.

I think deep down the guilt comes from the fact that you are used to giving with the expectation of something in return. As if you are betraying your one and only emotional transaction. Truth is, if your emotional wellbeing is disconnected from others, there is nothing to betray. The emotional exchange should not go beyond the moment itself.

hawkeaglejesus · 2016-07-29T17:12:58+00:00

the blue pill in me feels really guilty for showing this girl a great time and fucking her without any intentions to go further.

She doesn't have those intentions either. In a few days she'll be fucking a different dude.

recently broke contact with a girl who was way too into me

You established your boundaries. This is a good healthy thing to do.

I dislike that I'm hurting feelings or will eventually hurt feelings, while I go out and spread my seed of good nsa fun.

Do you think women feel guilty about leading on their beta orbiters while they're fucking chad?

Am I doing something wrong here?

No. For the first time in your life you're acting like a man. She wanted a good dicking, you gave her a good dicking. How can that be wrong?

Is this normal for recent red pill converts?

You have't fully deprogrammed your BP mindset.

What can I do about it?

Keep swallowing the red pill. And don't overestimate your influence on these girls' lives. If you hurt her feelings do you really think she doesn't have 20 others dudes lined up to take your place?

I see this quote on here a lot "When you're used to special treatment, equality feels like discrimination". You're experiencing the opposite. You're so used to being treated like shit that displaying the smallest amount of masculinity is making you feel like an asshole.

1pt21jiggawats · 2016-07-29T07:40:20+00:00

Just takes time to decondition yourself from a puritan mindset.

I was about 23 when it started to really break down for me. I had sex with a girl for the first time in a few years and I left to go cry afterwards because I felt like I let God down or something.

It's all just indoctrinated pseudo-morality. You were taught to "honor women" or some shit, and in your mind that means not "defiling" them with your dirty sinful sexual inclinations. Well, my friend, it's all horse shit.

If you want a girlfriend that is fine, but it doesn't mean you're not allowed to play the field and find out what kind of woman you really want to be with.

machimus · 2016-07-29T02:00:21+00:00

What wrong do you think you did to her? Can you actually think of one?

PeopleHateThisGuy · 2016-07-29T03:28:20+00:00

You should only feel bad if you intentionally deceived her. In your own words, she was ripping your clothes off. She wanted the D as much as you wanted the V. You feel guilty because the BP in you thinks that because you mated with her, you owe her a relationship. This is the same flawed logic that causes BPers to be crushed by women they thought they could be with who only wanted to fuck them.

neverbesmall · 2016-07-29T04:55:47+00:00

Just remember they have no honor and are going to tell their new beta orbiter that they're not ready for a relationship the next day.

[deleted] · 2016-07-29T17:53:39+00:00

[permanently deleted]

W_O_M_B_A_T · 2016-07-29T09:42:36+00:00

Note that women find any strong emotions to be satisfying and meaningful, fun even. So really the worst thing you can do is make her evening tedious. For example, being scorned/nexted by a guy they're obsessed with, gives powerful meaning to their lives. Trust me you've done her a favor.

Inducing shame, guilt, regret in others is women's favorite competitive sport, they love the power it gives them.

So if a woman acts offended or hurt in front of you, it's not because you've actually done something of consequence to them, it's just because women are the sorest losers on the planet. Absorb this, if a woman acts outraged or angry in from of you, it's a ploy. Don't feel guilty, don't buy that shit.

IF you actually become a hazard, they usually STFU and walk away, maybe go cry in the bathroom where nobody can see her genuine tears. So if you want to feel guilty that might be the time, you may have gone too far. But don't get too upset, women can handle their feelings if they so choose.

drqxx · 2016-07-29T12:33:07+00:00

I always watched this when I went on a date:

https://youtu.be/RGR4SFOimlk

CuntyMcFagNuts69 · 2016-07-29T14:35:23+00:00

Oxytocin is a hell of a drug to fight

MagmaiKH · 2016-07-29T17:46:41+00:00

You're greiving.
It has almost nothing to do with her.
She got what she wanted from you - your former, fading, dying, self is injecting all the LTR crap.

Apexk9 · 2016-07-29T02:00:33+00:00

Find the root of why you feel guilty then ask why do I feel like this

newguy889 · 2016-07-29T01:37:21+00:00

It looks like you need to think about why you came here in the first place again. Was it because you had all the girls you wanted? I doubt it. How did you think you'd feel when you started making progress?

Title	Why the fuck do I feel guilty?
Author	Ivetakenthepill
Upvotes	31
Comments	25
Date	July 29, 2016 1:25 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/4v449k/why_the_fuck_do_i_feel_guilty/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/why-the-fuck-do-i-feel-guilty.252 https://theredarchive.com/post/252

Comments

I always watched this when I went on a date: