TL;DR 29 y/o slightly below average looking balding male with 1 gf previously at 25 (for 3 months). Little to no sexual experience. Hates huge and loud social gatherings and is very judgmental of society and individuals in general. Dresses formally (work in finance) but listens to metal music, does not support any political movements as is pretty sure of inner power struggle in his country (Eastern Europe). Does not have any really specific hobbies and is generally a boring person unless engages in discussion about various topics. Holds to his opinion too strong and is not flexible in that matter which turns people off. Respects people for their qualities and only when respect is due not because politeness demands it. Is self centered, talks about himself, is rather a bad listener. Wants to change things because that destroys his only chance of having a real relationship.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ English is not my first language.

So. I have a serious problem. I am 29 year old male who doesn't look that good to be in online dating and isn't enough of "hot material" to sparkle any emotion from women when I talk to them. I am 6'3 and with brittle arms (rest of the body is ok) and ectomorph body - working out takes just too goddamn much effort to make slightest improvement. Also I don't want to lift for myself so I don't see a point in lifting for anyone else. That is one thing.

I can correct it with my personality, yes? Probably not because every time I meet people I can't make new friends because I don't like those people. Reason of me not liking them? I can't stand their bullshit and I will stand out as a hissy prick if I try to correct them or anything else. I have this sort of analytical mentality of viewing negative things first in order to assess risks. That is result of overly cautious parenting and my work ethic which unfortunately passes through to my social life. I am not able to feel emotions and be emotionally attached to people unless I love them. I don't feel sad if a father of my friend dies. Hell I wouldn't feel sad if he died.

I don't go out to dates because I can't score any women offline and I have no place to go offline. I have 2 masters degrees and I don't intend to go back to uni. My workplace has older women and as I stated before, I have no real hobbies.

My mother is freaking out because she wants grandkids (she is 61 atm) and there are none in sight. It makes me sad because I love her but it seems that I am not able to score anything. My friends are getting married, building houses etc. and I am still living alone in a rented apartment.

The only thing which doesn't give me sleep at night is people not accepting me for who I am. I like myself and I don't want to change that. I know I may be an asshole sometimes but I never attack people for no reason, I just dislike them and leave. For those who "I attack" - I have always given solid advice. People who listened to it , turned out to be good acquaintances. People who did not and burned themselves ( I was right) turned away from me. And these are people I liked. There are people I like too, but they don't like me afterwards. But there is never any female that would like me as a man. They all indulge in discussions with me and so on, but when it comes to feelings they cut it short and bail. They never ever let me present my intentions at the beginning, they always throw me off. I guess I give off bad vibes. I understood that I need to take things slower and yes it worked (as I progressed they became more open to me) but after a few meetups I understood things are going friendzone.

I listen to metal music but I don't have any affiliations with true metal lovers who attend such events. This is also a problem since girls mostly don't like metal music and those who do see me unfit for that kind of music (my dress code , calm behaviour).

When talking about different topics as stated before I always find a flaw in things and explain what is bad "in particular trend" or whatever. I always come off with unpopular opinion, because I don't like herd mentality and people falling for fads with no particular argumentation lose respect in my eyes so I test them this way (no, I don't wear a fedora).

I like dark humor (jokes about death mainly) Light humor doesn't make me smile a little which is also a problem since I am not hot enough and I can't get away with dark joke so easily.

I also can't make that emotional roller coaster ride for a woman since I am really bad at showing emotions and almost nonexistent at creating them (except for those moments when I make an unpopular opinion).

Its becoming harder to find a suitable female. Young ones are too experienced already and they see me through and old ones are single moms that have had their fun and it makes me sick to think that I deserve them. No, I don't want them. I never had fun and I don't want to have leftovers.

Yes. I am up in my ass. and my story was quite chaotic.

I will be later to answer questions if there are any.

Thanks.