Controlling emotions

stockmaniac · 2024-01-26T17:35:32+00:00

I actually went through with this with my gym crush recently. For context I used to have this problem in my early 20s when I would get infatuated with females and start dreaming up scenarios and expectations. It rarely played up that way and you set yourself up for disappointment.

As far as the gym crush goes. I finally approached her because the last time I saw her I smiled at her and held eye contact and she blushed. I took that as a greenlight . I didnt see her again for a whole month because I rotate gyms until yesterday, I saw the perfect opening where she was chilling without headphones. And I went for it. Idk if It was because I was hyped up on preworkout and was jittery but the conversation did not go as planned. I wasn't calmed cool and collected as I planned to be

Need less to say I got her IG but she hasn't added me back yet ( I usually have them take my ig but in this case she couldn't find me and I could tell she was getting nervous for being approached in public with a packed gym so I rushed the conversation) . I have already written her off mentally, but I will try to make eye contact and smile at her again to gauge interest next time. Maybe make a joke about how I'm still waiting for her to accept my request.

Tldr: Don't set expectations for people because that's what makes you think "your in love". Your in love with what YOU imagine this person to be and not who they actually are. Also if its not working out as you hope. Take a step back and emotionally divest. No girl is the "perfect girl"

ballsmashergal · 2024-01-26T17:50:48+00:00

Respect her think her as an equal to you ,

Think about her human aspects she doesn't wake up looking like an angel ,

She is a beautiful human treat her as a human don't put her on a pedestal as even if she won't end the relationship of you got in one you will eat yourself up in stress

Care for her as much as you care for yourself and it will increase your self respect

TonyDCoaching · 2024-01-26T17:10:28+00:00

we used to call this "Oneitis." And the advice was "GMTOW." Go meet ten other women. I think that advice still stands.

You can't "stop" emotions but you can learn to control them. This can takes years of work, self awareness, meditation, experience with women, experience with men.

You can't let a woman dictate your emotions. It's not masculine, and it WILL cause her to lose attraction for you.

DaygameCode · 2024-01-26T17:12:07+00:00

All this suffering for a girl who is very likely to say that she ain’t interested and doesn’t see you like that. Man, oneitis hurting men like this is sad to watch.

DependentAd1504 · 2024-01-27T07:33:49+00:00

We all have been there bro. And this path you are on leads to heart break which it hurts a lot and will affect your trust issues as well.

So to get over what situation you are in : Make your attention valuable. Spend and give less time to her . Let her miss you . And still if you want to be with her so desperately then make your move and let her know that you are interested in her romantically as well as sexually.

Once you made your move , if she responds positive then hurray to you. However if she responds negatively or saying let's just be friends, let's not affect make our friendship n all bullshit, Then just ghost her completely without any further explanation just say you don't wanna be just friends it's either complete or nothing.

This will help you keep your self-respect intact as well as she will also respect your this decisive and respectful nature.

AceOfSpadesGymBro4 · 2024-01-26T17:29:54+00:00

Yes! Text her and say "hey, I'm not really in the headspace to pursue a relationship right now and prefer to be alone. It has been great spending time wjth you and I'm sure you will find someone else. You are a threat gal after all". Then offer her to stay in touch but as friends only.

You will never have her until you are prepared to lose her.

SnooHesitations4922 · 2024-01-26T21:52:52+00:00

Work on your emotional control in all aspects of life, not just with women.

The key is to be stoic, which does not mean be a robot.

You can't kill your emotions or u kill your humanity. You can't bottle them up or they will show in your behavior. You definitely can't let them out full force.

What you can do is let them go.... disregard the emotions you are feeling. The difference between boys and men is the ability to disregard emotion to do what has to be done.

You can have emotions, you can even show them to close friends and family. What you can't do is make your decisions and actions based on how you feel.

Take the military for instance. If a navy seal is about to breach and clear a room full of armed enemies...he is scared shitless because he's human...but he has the training to disregard his emotions to effectively carry out his orders.

You just need the training.

The best way to disregard the butterflies when it comes to a girl you like is to keep your options open and talk to as many other girls as possible ..this is the emotional training. This way u ain't putting as much stakes on the interaction and can more easily disregard your emotional spikes and come off as genuine and level headed.

nordik1 · 2024-01-27T00:22:39+00:00

I'm absolutely in love with a girl, and she doesn't know it

This is a huge problem. She hasn't done anything to earn your liking, let alone love

You need to talk to and date other women, and a variety of them. She should be low on your priority list to clear this

Dandys3107 · 2024-01-27T08:49:05+00:00

I believe emotions are a good indicator of what is happening on the subconscious level. I guess you went pretty far with your imagination and adequate hormonal response activated. And these substances may be as addictive and potent as regular drugs. Still, I assume there is nothing really happening between two of you at the moment, and you are not even sure about her feelings. And you are waiting with making progress which is usually not a good indicator for success. You need to come back to present moment and take real actions. Daydreaming is a recipe for emotional drama. Your emotions are bothering you, because there is so much incongruence with your inner game.

Kagenikakushiteru · 2024-01-28T01:32:18+00:00

Every now and then we fall for emotions. When I feel that, but I know it’s not serious (since I have kids and a family anyway), I just delete them (not block) and don’t think about it.

Title	Controlling emotions
Author	Darl26061209
Upvotes	4
Comments	23
Date	January 26, 2024 5:04 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1abn82e/controlling_emotions/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/controlling-emotions.1427967 https://theredarchive.com/post/1427967

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