[deleted by user]

joeytwogun · 2021-10-11T22:32:06+00:00

College girls don't matter in the long run. You want to find someone who isn't so shallow anyway. If you're dead set on a girl from your college, find one at a study group or the library, not tinder

IntrovertDatingCoach · 2021-10-12T05:30:46+00:00

ONLY 20 matches?? Lol, she's lying to you. I posed as a woman on a dating app once and had 169 matches within 24 hours - she's just being modest...

Anyway, here's a quick tip: stop texting these women asking if they got back to their dorm ok. Seems like a small thing, but while you're viewing it as "I just want to show her I care about her safety and well-being," what she's FEELING when she gets that text is "I just saw this guy, and he's already trying to get MORE of my attention? Seems like he might be needy, and now I'm turned off."

Now, some people are going to read that and say, "That's not true!" Look - I'm 39. I've had many opportunities to test this out. My findings: the women I tried to check up on after a date or text right afterward, I rarely got second or third dates with. Meanwhile, women I took out where I didn't text them? One, they'd usually end up texting me (thus showing a growing interest), and two, I usually got multiple dates, which led to eventual hook-ups and relationships.

Why? Because THESE SMALL THINGS MATTER IN THE BEGINNING. You have to get better at understanding the effect your actions have on a woman's feelings for you. Checking on a woman post-date may make logical sense to you, but if you've done this for 6 dates and each time it's resulted in you not getting a second one... I'm just saying no longer doing that may be something to consider.

TheSunshineMan · 2021-10-12T00:54:49+00:00

6 dates..

How many of those did you have sex with?

I'm going to guess none?

The best way to secure a second date, is to have sex on the first.

Today I went on my 6th date from Tinder. It went well. We talked about similar interests, laughed at each other's jokes,

This doesn't mean anything.

She probably has similar interests and laughs at all her other guy friends' jokes too.

All this means is you're a normal guy.

What really matters is if you're breaking the friend barrier and coming across as someone that wants to fuck her?

Are you giving all of them strong sexual eye contact?

Are you flirting with them?

Are you breaking the physical touch barrier?

Are you sexually escalating?

Are you kissing them?

Are you fucking them?

If the answer is no to all those..

Then all you're doing is coming across as Mr. Nice Guy..

And that's it..

Let me guess at least a few of these girls has told you that you're a nice guy, but they didn't really feel any chemistry or a connection?

By not making any moves, showing your intentions of wanting them sexually, you're coming across as either:

A - just a nice friendly guy who's not interested in them, because you didn't make any moves

OR

B - You like her, but you're too much of a puss puss to make a move, turned her off, and you lost her interest.

How'd I do?

KingoftheNorth412 · 2021-10-11T22:39:34+00:00

That line is very white knightish. Definitely burn that line and never use it again.

Next time, walk her to her dorm if you’re actually concerned about her safety.

How do you compete with 20 dudes? Ever play sports? How did you make the team? How did you start? Be better than the rest man.

JacobMoogberg69 · 2021-10-12T05:48:59+00:00

Your answer is in your last sentence. You have low self esteem/confidence. Her opinion of you is more important than your opinion of you.

Get this through your thick skull. Women don't want a guy who feels he is below them. They don't want a guy who believes he is below them and who believes others are better than him (you literally have zero evidence of who these 20 guys are and no way of objectively comparing yourself to them).

Women crave a guy who feels and believes he is above them and has at least slightly more power. They want a man they need more than he needs them. If you are going on dates already being defeated and believing you have to impress her, you have already lost.

Work on your cognitive distortions that keep you in this low self image loop. You will need to learn to see yourself realistically instead of negatively and start having positive future expectations.

p00psicle151590 · 2021-10-12T14:38:39+00:00

The sad boy act needs to stop. The more you compare yourself and bring yourself down, the worse it will get.

Chin up, find yourself.

skatinislife446 · 2021-10-11T23:01:54+00:00

If you’re not kissing on the first date don’t expect a second

Sumisa-76 · 2021-10-11T23:22:51+00:00

"On dates I can FAKE a friendly and charming personality..." pretty much says it all right there. Sounds like you're not being genuine and despite what some men think, women do pick up on that.

Try being genuine and you might have better luck.

2021-10-11T23:36:11+00:00

In my head I read this post in Fry’s voice

2021-10-11T23:38:01+00:00

[permanently deleted]

yeah-nahh69 · 2021-10-12T05:18:59+00:00

"Can fake a charming and friendly personality"

Windowpie1234 · 2021-10-12T12:14:14+00:00

Please dont put yourself down by saying things like "girls would be repulsed with the thought of dating me"..I obviously dont know you but you sound like a nice thoughtful young man,your at college and should be worrying about your studies not looking for a long-term relationship. Make friends with females 1st, get to know them and have fun,if you end up sleeping together that's great but it's not everything,if the friendship turns more then go for it.

farang · 2021-10-12T17:31:54+00:00

>I will never be the best one and even if she genuinely likes me, it's guaranteed that she will find someone better soon.

With that kind of attitude, you're already in trouble.

There could be more than one reason why she didn't text back. Have a little patience.

MrCasanova_ · 2021-10-12T18:06:02+00:00

Stop caring, learn to have no attachment to the outcome… only them will you become successful in what you chase

Maezura_Talon · 2021-10-12T18:36:51+00:00

I'm listening to kid laroi's without you rn, and it's appropriate

truthbomb999 · 2021-10-12T19:15:03+00:00

Never get second dates.

They are using you for free time, meals, attention, etc...

Today I went on my 6th date from Tinder

You deserve all the misfortune you are going to get from using tinder.

It went well.

This sounds pretty far from "going well"

when it was over she hugged me

Ewww...just a hug? Don't do this to yourself

don't know if it is my looks or personality

Definitely looks, but you are also putting yourself in the role of a simp.

How can I compete with 20 guys?

Be better looking, more fun, or better overall. Just because there are 20 guys doesn't mean they are better than you.

ProfessorZoom80 · 2021-10-12T19:29:45+00:00

U are too nice, u go out with them and dont even try to kiss? thats why they act this way
She hugged you= i see you as a friend and not a sexual partner

2021-10-12T20:16:53+00:00

I NEVER GOT A DATE so be grateful lmao

UrFavPlayerIsBack · 2021-10-12T20:21:30+00:00

A whole time talked about similar interests & jokes.. She hugged.. Texted if she got back safe.. Faked.. Friendly..

Ps: she’s not home yet. She still has 20 more stops till gets home safe (& happy). Then she’ll def text. Or not

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	17
Comments	45
Date	October 11, 2021 10:25 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/q67hc4/deleted_by_user/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1274485 https://theredarchive.com/post/1274485

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