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[–]Sensitive_Quail_3636 54 points55 points56 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Another good sign is she will tease you, or plain make fun of /with you. Small jokes.
[–]MK2718 22 points23 points24 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Correct. Many men don't recognize that this is a way of either showing interest, or purposely testing your confidence in an accelerated way because she has some initial interest.
[–]mardyanduninterested 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I had a girl spit in my face on a night out when I started talking to another girl later on I thought she didn’t like me
[–]Delicious_Ad_1853 25 points26 points27 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Very true.
Also, this is why you have to be super careful in situations where she might feel like she can't easily leave. All of the dynamics change drastically if she feels isolated/trapped and decides her safest move is to play nice and hope you go away.
[–]MK2718 10 points11 points12 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Exactly. You should never make the other person feel like they are getting trapped in an interaction. The more they feel that they can end it at any time without any issues, the more comfortable they will feel to remain in the interaction. This is why showing that you are not emotionally dependent on the outcome of an interaction is so important. When the other person senses that you seem cool with whatever way the interaction ends up going, and that your emotions and actions are not dependent on how they respond, then they will feel much more comfortable with spending time with you.
[–]Delicious_Ad_1853 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's not just your actions that matter. You also need to be aware that certain settings can naturally make her feel trapped. She's likely to feel financially trapped at her workplace and vulnerable whenever she's alone in an unpopulated area.
[–]Electric_kundalini 61 points62 points63 points 4 years ago* (6 children) | Copy Link
I love Women. They're so mysterious and yet so batshit crazy.
[–]TheSunshineMan 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
mysterious
Not really.. girls are easy, you just need to learn how they operate.
[–]_SAKE 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
The way they operate is, be cowardly as fuck and make guys do every single thing yet still complain
[–]TheSunshineMan 22 points23 points24 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Yes girls are flaky..
Yes girls expect the man to lead..
Yes girls like to complain..
Normal female behavior..
Deal with it and move on..
Or let it hold you back, your choice..
[–]_SAKE 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I didn’t say anything was holding me back broski, just stating facts.
[–]tractorinballs -4 points-3 points-2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You’re an incel, just stating facts
[–]GripIsEverything1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Please preach sensei.
[–]MuMuGorgeus 12 points13 points14 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I hate these videos cause I always learn the same thing:
She's not interested, in fact, no one has ever been interested
It's a bit depressing. I rather watch Round 6' theory videos
[–]PristineAd9800 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Have confidence, make sure you dress nice or are confident in what you wear, smell good, be well groomed and have god conversational skills, shows do matter! A small offering of a drink or paying a small bill is a token in the right direction but can be taken the wrong way real quick. Just be you happy and confident eventually it will happen.
[–]Indekar 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Be more charming then
[–]MuMuGorgeus 10 points11 points12 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Great advice! Will do
[–]SDdude81 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Sadly this is not a guarantee that she is interested.
A few years ago I had a close friend that let I would constantly cuddle with. There were a few times we would go out bar hopping, come back to my place at 2 AM and chill on the couch while I'm stroking her legs. Then I try to kiss her and she stops me? That happened twice.
We were friends for about another month after my last loss attempt then she started dating someone. I was basically in shock when it happened.
Women are so confusing.
[–]KneedHelpQuicc 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
yeah that’s fucked
[–]Delicious_Ad_1853 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
How long had you been friends at that point? You probably should have expressed your interest wayyyy sooner. At the very least, it would have saved you a lot of time and confusion.
[–]SDdude81 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
We were friends (coworkers) for a few weeks till the first time I expressed interest.
The first time we hung out was getting drinks after work. The best time we went swimming and drinking at the river, also drinking and I was very handsy.
Next time we went bar hopping, I brought her back to my place and then I tried to kiss her. If she didn't stop me we probably would have had sex that night.
[–]Delicious_Ad_1853 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Sounds like she was interested, just not quite enough.
Don't lose sleep over oddball situations like this. It's anybody's guess what was going through her head when she set that boundary. Odds are, it had very little to do with you personally.
[–]SDdude81 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It was a couple of years ago but I'm still frustrated. I rarely get that close to girls.
[–]Delicious_Ad_1853 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You're frustrated that you weren't able to capitalize on the opportunity?
[–]MasterTeacher123 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Also Girls who liked me always went out of their way to touch me, this has grown exponentially since I started going hard in the gym 4 years ago and they start touching my arms lol
[–][deleted] 12 points13 points14 points 4 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
So far my role in this subreddit is to confirm information about women, and yet again this guy has us figured out!
Make sure if a girl is doing stuff like this, including touching your arm a little while you're talking, playfully bumping into/pushing you, sitting next to you with multiple open chairs around and you're into her as well, reciprocate! Show her you notice what she's doing by going just a little further. You can create a lot of small but meaningful moments this way.
Also keep in mind that it's a lot easier for a guy to look like a creep while playing this game than it is for a girl.
[–]CreeknAndKraken 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
So, let’s say a girl walked by and she steps on top your foot intentionally, and then follows up by slapping your arm? Does that possibly count?
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
Honestly that sounds more like something a seven-year-old boy would do while trying to flirt. But speaking for my age and gender, it just depends on the context:)
[–]CreeknAndKraken 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, this is definitely a strange one. She has hit me on the arm after making fun of her before, but in this instance I was minding my own business she went to check on her phone which was on the table near me, but she made a point to walk over and step on me before she did. She had plenty of room to avoid me. Pretty strange…
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Ok, I never imagined you were asking this question because a girl actually did this?? That's... wild?? Did you possibly do something to annoy her? Otherwise this could be a weird attempt to get your attention?? I've never had this many question marks in a post before??
[–]CreeknAndKraken 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Yep, this happened I swear! I honestly didn’t say anything right before, but admittedly I probably have been too harsh at times with the teasing. Honestly, I’m not interested in trying to make something happen between us, but she is so damn annoying some times I can’t help but say some shit. I seriously could write a book on all the weird interactions I’ve had with her. We’re part of the same friend group so I can’t avoid her it’s really frustrating. Really not sure why she acts the way she does. She doesn’t seem to act this way with her other guy friends.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
So you obviously aren't actually wanting any advice and I can totally see why you don't care about her, lol. But she's probably just immature/inexperienced and maybe does have a big crush on you, that would explain all the weird interactions as well as why she treats you differently than other men. Do you know if she's still interested in you? Does she text you a lot, do other normal flirty things aside from acting like a weirdo?
[–]CreeknAndKraken 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
She used to message me a lot, but I was becoming increasingly uncomfortable with the way she interacts with me that I pulled back significantly on texting with her. Still have to see her often, which is friggin sweet! Anyway, at a wedding for a friend, she has done the “Oh, you got dirt on you’re new suit! Let me get that for you!” and rubbed my shoulder. I didn’t say anything, but gave her a look that I was clearly not cool with that, but she doesn’t care. In fact everyone in my group doesn’t seem to care, which is awesome /s. Tons of other things she’s said/done. I feel kind of like a jerk for ignoring her, but it’s kind of hard to be your friend, when you continuously violate my boundaries, no? I don’t think she gets that.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
That makes sense. I think as long as you're clear about your intentions, and it sounds like you are, you don't need to feel like a jerk at all. Make sure she knows without a doubt that you don't want any future romantic interaction ever by telling her explicitly but respectfully, preferably to her face. If she's as much of a creep as I think she is, do it as soon as possible. You don't have to meet her alone or make a big deal out of it either, just one direct comment is enough.
There's a lot of double standards in a situation like this. If you were a girl and she were a guy, everyone would be coming to your defense, especially when she touches you without consent. But I hope most everyone already recognizes that. Just keep it in mind, because a girl would be expected to be as explicit and careful as possible, otherwise everyone would say she was "leading him on." So do that. At the same time, none of this is your fault.
Edit: girls can be pretty clueless when you're dropping hints that you ARE interested, so I can imagine that some of us are clueless to hints that you definitely are NOT. So make sure she knows, especially if you've had any remotely romantic activity in the past - then she doesn't have an excuse anymore. Thinking about this from both perspectives, as a girl I would hate to be an accidental creep to a guy I liked, so don't let that happen to her. If she seriously won't leave you alone when you ask for it straight up, that's her problem.
[–]CreeknAndKraken 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Yeah, I will try to keep that in mind as far as handling things with her in the future. I know it’s not my fault, cause I honestly can’t imagine anything I’ve ever done would give her the idea that I’m ok with her acting that way. Well, anyway thanks for listening, I think I just needed to vent about this as there isn’t anyone in rl I can talk to this about.
[–][deleted]2 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Makes sense! I'm glad I could help!
[–]Ok-Condition2364 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, she’s smitten and Hittin’! Run!
[–]Least1ngenuity 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
All of these are good signs with one caveat. There needs to be some sexual tension. Otherwise youre just that gay friend in her eyes.
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]Neuvebroke 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I think it’s different for everyone.
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[–]Sensitive_Quail_3636 54 points55 points56 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]MK2718 22 points23 points24 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]mardyanduninterested 9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Delicious_Ad_1853 25 points26 points27 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]MK2718 10 points11 points12 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Delicious_Ad_1853 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Electric_kundalini 61 points62 points63 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheSunshineMan 5 points6 points7 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]_SAKE 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheSunshineMan 22 points23 points24 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]_SAKE 3 points4 points5 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]tractorinballs -4 points-3 points-2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]GripIsEverything1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]MuMuGorgeus 12 points13 points14 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]PristineAd9800 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Indekar 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]MuMuGorgeus 10 points11 points12 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]SDdude81 9 points10 points11 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]KneedHelpQuicc 5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Delicious_Ad_1853 1 point2 points3 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]SDdude81 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Delicious_Ad_1853 2 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]SDdude81 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Delicious_Ad_1853 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]MasterTeacher123 13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 12 points13 points14 points (11 children) | Copy Link
[–]CreeknAndKraken 0 points1 point2 points (10 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]CreeknAndKraken 1 point2 points3 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]CreeknAndKraken 1 point2 points3 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]CreeknAndKraken 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]CreeknAndKraken 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–][deleted]2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Ok-Condition2364 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Least1ngenuity 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Neuvebroke 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link