Don't be shy, don't try and hide your intentions

youlovethisish · 2015-10-02T17:40:08+00:00

So here's the thing, I have a bit of theory about this.

I believe that intentions are only going to push the interaction forward if you've already established attractiveness. What are the ways your level of attractiveness is established before you get to know a girl?

Physical Appearance
Approach
Social Value (coming from entertaining a big group of friends, etc)

See, the direct approach is fantastic - if they've already decided that you're attractive to them. If you're not attractive to them, the direct approach will most likely come off as creepy to them. I'm a short, dark skinned East Indian guy, so I don't fit the ideal physical appearance for the Western "hot guy" - thus, I run into this a lot haha. Now, you can build attraction even if you're not originally attractive to her (that's what the gender-relations portion of game is all about), so don't dig yourself a grave by displaying intent immediately, without giving her a chance to find you attractive.

You need to gauge whether you're attractive to her before spouting off intentions. LOOK FOR IOIs before establishing intent directly. Then, go ahead and move forward with your intent. Example, girl stops at the crosswalk next to you, glances over a couple times, smiles. It's an IOI - you can go in with a "you're cute, and i wanna see if you're interesting too" opener.

On the other hand, girl standing at the bus stop, closed off body language, no indicators at all. Starts small - something that is somewhat neutral but evokes an emotional response... "Hey, quick question for you. My friends and I were having this debate and I wanna get your opinion..." and if the interaction is leading to IOIs and you are gaining attraction, you can reveal intentions (but do so NATURALLY - as if you just realized that she's cute after several minutes of talking to her).

Let me know if this sounds fucked up. All feedback welcome.

CaptainDoge7 · 2015-10-02T20:05:52+00:00

You end up seducing her after getting her number anyway.

Eddie07 · 2015-10-02T21:56:28+00:00

This is what held me back for a very looong time ;(

lItsAutomaticl · 2015-10-04T05:40:56+00:00

I did 2 approaches today where I straight up told them I thought they were cute/adorable and wanted to go out with them. I've done this before of course, but I'd always do it with a kind of sly/reserved manner; today I let myself go and actually acted like I was fucking excited about it (which I was). One had a bf and the other was leaving my city today, but they were easily the two best reactions I've ever had while approaching.

I take two things from it: 1) Getting excited is a way of opening up and being vulnerable and genuine, which girls love. 2) Excitement is contagious. If the girl is a kind of bitch the giddiness would be a turnoff, but at this point I don't care because I'm not interested in girls like that.

silver_nuke13 · 2015-10-04T15:25:45+00:00

But that gives her validation, it's a double edged one

SmoothPrimal · 2015-10-03T04:05:28+00:00

Lol never ever? How many approaches have you done? Girls will respond negatively to you no matter what you say if they are in a bad mood.

That "waste of time" you call flirting is the part that women enjoy the most.

AtlasAtlasAtlas · 2015-10-03T01:17:06+00:00

Hot girls don't like being told they're beautiful, they already know that.

CaptainDoge7 · 2015-10-03T16:45:46+00:00

No screw that that's way too forward a girl won't like that cause she'll be caught off guard

But also because like what can their be to do to talk about after. I mean if you aren't forward at first you can be subliminal and indirect and get her to like you

ImJustSo · 2015-10-02T21:04:20+00:00

I don't believe women need to know what I'm thinking. And I will just never go up and tell women that I think they're attractive, because it's never been necessary to my success. Women need to find me attractive and them knowing that I find them attractive is not necessary to their success. All that's necessary for their success is for me to kiss them when the time has come. All that's necessary for my success is for them to find me attractive, so I always find advice like this on this sub to be redundant information. It gets men/boys here to act more confident, which women find attractive, but it's not a key to success.

Being confident and attractive is key to success, so whatever it takes, sure...do it.

Title	Don't be shy, don't try and hide your intentions
Author	Braydawg9
Upvotes	217
Comments	32
Date	October 2, 2015 4:39 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3n8seg/dont_be_shy_dont_try_and_hide_your_intentions/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/dont-be-shy-dont-try-and-hide-your-intentions.1295008 https://theredarchive.com/post/1295008

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