Saturday (6 days ago) I met a girl at a party. She's cute, fit, nice rack, nice yoga instructor body, and she just broke up after a 4 year relationship so she's not sure what she wants next at age 32.

So we set up to have drinks on tuesday, liquid lunch. We meet at the place, we have one drink, we talk about the usual, life, fun, how most people are clueless about what's important in life. Then the bartender asks if we want a second round, I look at her, she looks at me, and I say We're good. Check please!

Where are we going? she asks.

My place!, I've got this kick-ass artisan vodka that makes killer martinis It's just an excuse, they need an alibi.

So off we go to my place. Within 15 minutes we were both naked exploring each other's bodies.

But that's not the point.

I've been working hard, really hard. Today at 3-ish I finished a project that I've been working for 2 weeks and I decided to start the weekend. Got home, I was hungry (no lunch) and horny.

So I decided to text my new friend

me: Hey, what's up tonight?

new friend: going out with the girls

me: that's nice! Want to stop by on your way there?

nf: why don't you come with us?

me: nah, too tired, I need to unwind

nf: I wish I could stop by, but I am running late

me: don't worry, just stop by, I will be on the couch naked, give me a blow job and go on your way

nf: that's selfish

me: yes it is. Come over, I will have a martini ready to wash it down afterward. It won't take long, trust me

nf: I can't, they are waiting for me and my hair is a mess

me: I am a guy, I don't care. Messy is the new sexy. Didn't you see there's something about Mary?

nf: OK, be there in 15 min.

So che comes over, blows me (she swallows), downs the martini, I am horny again, we have a quickie and I cum in her.

So now she's off to a bar with the girls, with my jizz in her mouth and in her pussy, while guys are lining up asking for #-close, k-close. I hope none of them gets so lucky to go down on her. It might taste funny.

I am sorry. NOT!

For the record, she's 32 and I am 50.

Nice guys do finish last, I know because I used to be one of them.