Before I start: I love weed, I love getting high, I'm not quitting anytime soon. Discussion over.

So it's Saturday, July 2nd. Canada Day fireworks have died down now, people are getting over their hangovers and life is pretty much back normal. The night before, a friend and I drive to a close-by town because it was this cutie HB8's birthday and I've been meaning to see her all summer. Long story short, we couldn't get into the bar so I said hello to her and her friends real quick and left. Next day she sends me a txt:

"Hey! I'm no longer going clubbing today but I'm having people over to chill by the pool and play some beer-pong. Come! :)"

I immediately txt my friend I was with the night before (who was only there for the weekend. Let's call him N) and let him know he's got a second shot. Before we left, we tried grabbing our other friend (His name will be D). Turns out he was with one of our other friends (H) and they wanted to smoke. Now I didn't want to be the guy that brings all of his bros to a party, I just wanted to keep it between my close circle of friends (N, D and myself) so N and I decide we'll chill/smoke up with D and H and then drop H off and take D (in reality, this plan was much more complex and much much funnier but that's another story). Finally we drop H off and head to the party.

Now, at this point, I'm still very stoned. My friends are way more stoned than I am. We're all excited for this party but we all knew how fucked up we were. I reassured them that we'll be fine by the time we get to the party and they're will be plenty of broads for them to mack on. I was wrong.

We get to the house, first thing I do is ring the door bell. High move because the door was unlocked. Random girl opens it and everyone is standing and looking around at my friends and I. Before coming to the party, I expected this place to be flooded with people, if not, at least have about 20-30 people. Nope. This party had about 10-15, mostly couples, but definitely no single chicks besides the girl who invited me. I could already tell my friends were disappointed.

So after some introductions and a bunch of back-and-forth I make the suggestion that we move downstairs. We do and we start semi-partying. Right off the bat, I could tell my shit wasn't flying. I don't know if it was because I was putting off the wrong type of energy or if my frame just sucked but no one was receptive to anything I was saying. I remained calm though (thanks to the weed) and kept plowing through but I could tell I was not liked at all.

After a game of beer-pong and eating all the snacks she laid out, BirthdayGirl (that's what I'ma call her) asks me to come upstairs with her. Again, remember, I was still very stoned. As we're walking up, I had my hand on her hip for a couple of seconds then for some reason, I moved on to....the shoulders? I don't know what I was doing but kino was happening so atleast that's a plus.

We get to the kitchen and we start talking. Since I was stoned, my game wasn't at 100 so I was just going through the steps really awkwardly and clumsly. Had I been sober and in the same situation, I would've just made out with her right there; all the signs were pointing to it (her arms around me, tight hugs, kiss on the cheek, 'come upstairs with me'). But my high mind plays tricks on me and I just made it really awkward by asking her to teach me how to golf with an invisible club. Her friend comes in after a couple of minutes and whisks her away. Thank god!

I get back to my friends. Both N and D are not talking to anyone but each other. I step in and start talking to them. We're all laughing at how stoned we are and how no one knows but we know when all of a sudden, a group of 6 gangsta looking guys walk in. I don't introduce myself, I just continue talking to my friends. Then I hear this:

BirthdayGirl's friend: I don't like them. They're not saying anything and they're creeping me out.

Random guy: He's probably waiting for her to be more drunk hahahaha.

Other guy: Yea, this guys only tryina get in her pants fo sho.

It's at that moment that I knew FOR SURE that we were the most hated people there. I didn't let it affect me tho, I just went on doing what I was doing. I take my friends to the couch and we watch some TV with the other guests. Gangsta crew leaves after a while.

So we're in the middle of Pirates of the Caribbean on the TV when these three alpha guys walk in. These guys were all tall, good-looking and social as shit. I immediately knew I had to align. I made friends with the leader of the group (let's call him Alpha) and we were shooting shit all night; we pretty much became each other's wings. This guy was cool tho. He knew how to have fun and get people talking and feeling great and just put out a good vibe. The funny thing is, he was after BirthdayGirl too. He didn't even want to be (just said she was a cool chick), but BirthdayGirl's friends were pushing him on her, his friends were pushing her on him and he even told me his friend's dad flat out went to BirthdayGirl's mom and dad and said "meet your new son-in-law". It felt like the odds were against me but I just kept going with it because I was having fun.

Eventually the party died down and everyone left except for me, my friends, Alpha and his friends and the BirthdayGirl's. For the next hour or so, Alpha and I were pretty much trying to get the attention of BirthdayGirl. Looking back at this now, this felt SOOOOO beta! We were both on either side of her while she was stuck in this middle of this verbal tug-of-war basically. I knew how to get out of this too, but I was still feeling socially retarded from the weed and kinda drunk so I felt like I had to 'win' her. I will say that I had more kino with her throughout the interaction but it was just a sad display either way. Sober-me would've known to pull back, let him try getting her attention and reframe the situation as 'you two make the cutest couple' thus pushing her away from him.

Alpha finally left after a few hours and I tried to get a kiss in but I just went for the cheek instead and called it a night.

All-in-all it was a funny night. I know I didn't close, I know I didn't make many friends and I know I fucked up a lot but I'm still happy. I'll get her next time and next time, I'll remember not to bun up beforehand.