How do I cold approach in college?

PlantainExpensive360 · 2026-02-21T20:53:56+00:00

You're not confident enough for now and I think it's cupid to think about 10s

See every girl as your equal

Prayin2DaMoney · 2026-02-21T20:54:27+00:00

Approaching in college is good but slightly overrated. Expect plenty of rejections before you do it, there are lots of girls who are closed off, not in the right headspace to talk, or have boyfriends. But because of the sheer number of girls everywhere you can still give yourself a good chance

epimpstyle · 2026-02-21T21:51:53+00:00

It’s interesting how everyone thinks he’s a special case with a special problem that keeps him from talking to a girl. In your case, your excuse is your ethnicity, as if saying that if you weren’t Indian, everything would be fine, but since you are, you have no chance.

I suggest you look up Deepak Wayne on YouTube he’s an Indian guy well over 40, and guess what? He dates women in their 20s in Germany.

The process of talking to a lady is easy. If things go well, great. If not, just walk away. There’s no need to force a conversation when you’re not getting a good reaction, it’s that simple. Dealing with the anxiety behind it is the real challenge.

Go outside, walk around, put on a medical mask so half your face is covered, and theoretically it should be easier to at least ask a girl a simple question. Come on, it’s really not that difficult. Your face is covered, nobody knows you, and even if they see you again 30 minutes later without the medical mask, they’ll have a hard time recognizing you. Maybe they could guess based on your clothes or hair, but even that is pretty difficult.

It’s difficult at the beginning, you have all kinds of preconceptions and all kinds of worries. But once you see that other people, especially most girls, are nice, friendly, and polite, everything changes

ArmorAbsMrKrabs · 2026-02-22T18:18:38+00:00

Okay first of all you should work on getting a social circle. Having friends is important. It sounds like you do have some friends.

Dating apps are skewed and the attention is distributed unevenly. The bar for entry is high, you need great pictures unless you're already extremely good looking. And even then, your results are capped by your looks. That's just how online dating is. If you wanna DM me your profile I can try to help you out.

I don't think you should cold approach yet. It's one of the most ruthless unforgiving ways to meet women. Not that it's not valuable, but you probably need to work on your inner game and social skills more before you do it.

I would suggest trying to talk to women in warm environments, like clubs (school clubs, not nightclubs). Places where socializing is encouraged.

If you're determined to try cold approach just know what you're getting yourself into. It's not easy at all, and a lot of PUA guys spout it as if it's some panacea that will have you drowning in women. That couldn't be any further from the truth.

I'm not telling you this to discourage you. It's extremely rewarding and it's changed my life in so many ways.

There's no magic advice I can tell you. There's no shortcut. The only way you learn to do it is by facing the anxiety over and over again until it loses its power over you. And it most likely will never fully go away. It just gets weaker and you get better at not letting it control you.

Broad-Cranberry-9050 · 2026-02-23T01:10:23+00:00

I get how you feel. i went through this shit in college too. But i think the first thing you have to start doing is stop making excuses. So what your indian? I know indian guys who can pull. Even if you are ugly let's say, women arent shallow on looks. If you can be confident and social woman will be more open to it. I get social anxiety, i had it too. I am a firm believer that people can learn to be social.

Ill give you some tips i wish i knew back in college:

- Stop using dating apps as your #1 way of meeting women. There are 2x many men as women. WOmen are more picky of who they swipe on and it creates a false reality of what it's like out there. I promise you the belief that you are not attractive enough is coming from the fact you think the lack of interest you see in the apps is the same as you would see in reality.

- Learn how to scoialize. College is for learning, part of that learning is learning how to socialize with strangers. I have found that men who struggle with women also struggle with men they just met. So try to learn how to talk to new ppeople regardless of gender. The idea is to get comfortable meeting new people and not expecting anything in return.

- Create opportunities to meet new people. Talk to everybody, even people in your class. If you like the conversation get their number. Then every wednesday or thursday just text a bunch of people and say "im trying to go out this weekend anybody down to get a group together?" see what clicks. Be the guy that gets people together. Friendships are transactional, nobody wants to be the person that organizes but everybody wants to get invited. If you become the organizer in turn people will see you as a go to person. People will then invite you to things. You never know when a new guy you meet could lead you to a girl whose down to hookup.

- Improve your looks. Do not fall in the trap that women iwll kiss your feet because you have a 6 pack. But looks do help with 1st impression. The better you look, the less personality you need and vice versa. Buy clothes that make you look good. You dont need to break the bank. Get haircuts that make you look better. Invest in a good cologne. Buy a going out jacket that you can wear on nights out to look good. AGain, this wont make women kiss your feet but if you arent dressed well, that first impression can make a woman immeidiately know she will not fuck you before you even say hi. But if you seem like you care about how you dress, she will at least be open to it if your personality is there.

- Go where the single women are at. Go to parties. This excuse that you dont go to parties because youarent 21 is an excuse. When you turn 21 you will find another excuse. College kids party. There are 18 year olds going to parties.

- When you go to parties, dont lean on friends for conversation. Branch out and talk to new people. Women like social guys. Women go out to have fun, men go out to get laid. So be the guy that goes out for fun. Getting no girls should not be recipe for a bad night. Getting girls is more icing on the cake for a good night. Because when you go into every conversation with a woman thinking "i want her number" you are putting her on a pedestal and then come off as desperate. You have to be genuine. Dont force niceness, dont force asshole behavior. Women like nice guys, they just dont like the nice guys who are only being nice to them because they are hot. If a song comes up that you like, put your hand out to the first single girl you like and dance.

- Treat women like bros. THey love that. THye get treated like glass vases so much that when a guy comes and treats them like a bro they love it. I once called a woman a nepo baby, she could've gotten mad but she didnt she tried to get me back. It'snot saying that women wont get annoyed at that, but dont be afraid of women getting mad. To get girlsyou gotta take risks.

- Take educated risks and learn body language. Do not assume a woman wants to be left alone or anythign like that. A woman will tell you what she is ok with you doing to her throuhg body language. Just dont go too quick too early. So you should slowly create physical contact (handshake, hug, etc) if you feel pushback or hesitation then dont go further. But if she is open to it then you continue going fruther until you feel the pushback. Pull women to dance and and get closer and closer until you basically are making out (again take it slow, read her body language any moment of pushback stop). Dont be afraid of pushback just be respectful if it happens. One time i saw a cute girl, i asked her about a bottle she was holding and she basically told me to mind my business and leave her alone. 6 years ago i would've let that annoy me and never talked to another girl. But today, I just go to the next person and see if they are social.

- Understand you will fail a lot but that's ok. You have to learn what works for you. Learn from your mistakes. The best guys only succeed like 5% of the time. Even the guys you think are killing it, really arent they are just trying and swingnng at everyone. They are trying and talking with every woman and not afraid of failing.

- Actually try. Talking to a woman for 5 minutes isnot trying. WHne you go out write goals. Small and slowly grow them. I.e. talk 1 girl, then 3 girls, then dance with 1 girl then get 1 number, etc.

readonlyuser · 2026-02-26T08:05:41+00:00

You need to be at parties, not cold approaching. *In college, parties are the Nexus of social activity and romance. Make friends that throw parties. Throw parties yourself. You need to network. Cold approaches and tinder are going to be way more effort with way worse results.

ProfessionalGoat551 · 2026-02-21T19:23:27+00:00

I have a question, Are you solely pursing white woman ?

You mentioning that you’re brown gives me the assumption that you are trying to date non brown girls. Is that the case ?

Title	How do I cold approach in college?
Author	Usual-Bug916
Upvotes	1
Comments	16
Date	February 21, 2026 5:59 PM UTC (5 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1raxt7g/how_do_i_cold_approach_in_college/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-cold-approach-in-college.1573950 https://theredarchive.com/post/1573950

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