How do I cure oneitis of 7 years?

addicted_to_whores · 2016-05-24T21:44:20+00:00

Just as you cure oneitis of any lenght. Realize your worth. Stop depending on others. Realize that she is not so unique. Don't put your mental well being in the hands of other people.

Heflar · 2016-05-24T22:02:37+00:00

meet other girls, the reason she seems so special is probably because she is one of few girls you know.

seldor · 2016-05-25T00:00:26+00:00

The girl you love in your mind is not the same girl who exists in reality.

ThrowawayPUA · 2016-05-24T20:42:35+00:00

Kill Beatrice.

lucaduval1971 · 2016-05-24T22:42:10+00:00

Old redditor here. You will have to go a few times over the same process. Over and over again, girl after girl after girl. Then one day you'll realize that it's all in your mind. You're just projecting some imaginary qualities on this or that girl. but it's not real.

manelsen · 2016-05-24T21:59:33+00:00

OP, hit Steve Andreas' book Heart of the Mind. You're seeking specifically for the chapter on overcoming grief. Maybe you'll be able to find it under the name "Grief Pattern" if you Google for it.

You're stuck in a neverending grief loop, continuously reinforced by the toxic hope born from the fact that the object of your obsession is alive as a kicking. If the Grief Pattern won't cut it, you'll need the Forgiveness Pattern first, then the Grief Pattern.

NLP is your friend, not only for Speed Seduction.

Btw, hit the TRP IRC channel. You'll grow a pair in no time.

beywesley · 2016-05-25T00:00:36+00:00

Getting over a relationship is five pussies away. Work on Game, and sleep with as many beautiful women as you can. Puts the relationship into perspective.

imlisteningtotron · 2016-05-24T22:10:50+00:00

I had oneitis for a long time as well. Then, I actually got a date with the girl. Which then turned into a relationship. Which then turned into a break up.

She was all I could think about, the first thing in the morning and the last thing at night. In my head, I created a version of her that was the perfect woman for me. That wasn't who she was though. Turns out that while I found her physically attractive, we didn't really match on a personal level. I spent a lot of time forcing myself to like what I found out about her because "She must be the one, I've liked her for too long for her not to be". It became a vicious cycle.

It is only now I really understand the whole valuing yourself stuff. I don't know how you will get there, but maybe when you realise she isn't the same as that perfect woman that exists in your imagination, you'll start to question why exactly you feel the way you do about her.

Imouthere87 · 2016-05-24T23:08:57+00:00

Got damn

M_Knight1 · 2016-05-25T19:22:04+00:00

Most young males operating in a scarcity mindset catch the disease Oneitis at some point in their young adult lives. If not promptly caught and cured, Oneitis can take years away from one’s life. You can pour all your time and energy into a lost cause instead of using it to improve yourself. Having suffered myself from a very dire case of the disease, I am accustomed to the symptoms. The symptoms of Oneitis can include:

 Spending an abnormal amount of time thinking and obsessing over one girl.

 Believing that one girl is completely different from every other girl that you have ever met.

 Believing that one girl is the most beautiful girl in the world.

 Believing that there is no other girl for you but her.

 Believing that no one else could ever match the love that you have for a girl.

 Believing that a girl is absolutely perfect and could do no wrong in your eyes.

 Putting a girl before everything else in your life.

An additional symptom would include not seeing anything wrong with holding the above beliefs. You may believe that if a girl only truly knew how much you cared about her, that she would love you in return. However, this is not the way attraction or love actually works. When you truly love a person, you do not need anything from them in return. Arriving at this realization took me years and was the most painful lesson that I have ever had to learn. There is no such thing as “the one,” but only people who are more or less compatible together. Love is something you build, not something you find.

While I have no doubt that the feelings which you have are genuine, these feelings originate from a place of scarcity and fear. You may mistake the burning desire you have for a woman as the being the truest form of love. Fear resulting from scarcity infiltrates the heart and amplifies certain emotions to an unhealthy level. If this is the first time that you have ever felt this way, then you may be terrified of losing the woman for whom you feel these feelings. You may fear that you may never again feel this same way about anyone else. The truth is that you may be right. However, this is not due to you having lost out on the love of your life, but to the fact that you no longer live in scarcity. Once the scarcity mindset is removed, you can find someone with whom you can have a relationship with that is built on positive emotions, instead of the hidden underlying emotions of loneliness and fear.

Now looking back, having my heart broken was one of the best things that could have ever happened to me. Had a need based relationship instead ensued, I would have never become the person I am today. I would have unknowingly submitted to comfort and security rather than venturing out into the world to learn its truths for myself. I would have remained a weak man and never developed the deep self-love, self-confidence and self-reliance which are prerequisites to unselfishly loving another person.

The above passage is an excerpt from the book: Fundamentals of Female Dynamics

http://www.amazon.com/Fundamentals-Female-Dynamics-Practical-Attracting/dp/0692655166/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1461064917&sr=8-1

roycocup · 2016-05-24T22:28:03+00:00

You can't buy willpower. You have to want to move on. We all have different motivations. You must find the reasons why you think you should, see where you would like to go/be, and build a bridge (keep a note) of how to go from where you are, to where you want to go.

Move on. Just drop it.

FriedLizard · 2016-05-24T22:42:48+00:00

[permanently deleted]

BrettEllisDotNet · 2016-05-25T03:01:13+00:00

The problem is the world according to you is extremely scarce. In actuality, there are over 3.5 billion women out there - Even a tiny percentage is a huge amount and of that, chances are they're a better fit than your ex is anyway. (Or you'd still be with her). Go see how the world really is, not the way you think it is.

DDOS_Feeler · 2016-05-25T12:26:38+00:00

go for multiple dates

DecimoX · 2016-05-25T21:45:45+00:00

You meet more people, girls preferably. When you meet them you shouldn't judge and for the love of God don't compare them with that one girl you've got oneitis for. Actually when meeting new people/girls if it's difficult not to think about her say in your head "I'm interacting with another human being right now, as perfect and human as that other girl. It looks like she's not that special after all. I want to get to know the girl in front of me better!" or something shorter than that but with the same meaning

deadcell · 2016-05-24T21:47:14+00:00

Go cliff diving. If that hasn't helped, do it again but pick a higher ridge.

anon10500 · 2016-05-24T23:00:10+00:00

(srs) imagine her fat for a few weeks, her eating doritos and smelling bad etc..

420Hookup · 2016-05-25T00:19:53+00:00

Just move on? I mean it's that easy. Realize you'll never be with this girl as a partner and move on.

UntitledDream · 2016-05-24T21:28:57+00:00

So this is what this sub has become?

Title	How do I cure oneitis of 7 years?
Author	redpillthrowaway20
Upvotes	20
Comments	39
Date	May 24, 2016 8:34 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/4kvwkj/how_do_i_cure_oneitis_of_7_years/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-cure-oneitis-of-7-years.1407244 https://theredarchive.com/post/1407244

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