How fast was your progress?

urnes011 · 2013-04-03T02:21:30+00:00

I base my pickup on 4 principles, as this is what works for me, and keeps me going...

1) There are literally MILLIONS of women out there for you to date, so no need to stress over one.

2) Each rejection stings, but it makes you stronger in the end.

3) No woman EVER owes you anything, if she rejects you, never take it personally. Learn from every mistake, analyze every date.

4) Have FUN!, DROP YOUR EGO, and just go.

I started out with a 4 year long dry spell, heartbroken from seeing an ex from half a decade ago, I decided I needed to change... Since then I have banged more girls than I would like to brag about just in the past 6 months. I have gone on so many dates, dealt with so much drama, made so many new friends, and learned so much about women that my entire perspective of the dating world has completely changed.

I approach(ed) a LOT. Day game, night game, club game, waitresses game, online dating etc...

Every step of the way was a struggle...

At first I would get rejected while just approaching, once I learned how to approach I could not get the digits, once I learned to get the digits my text game raped me, once I learned proper text game/phone game I started getting dates, my first 2 months I had gone on about 8 dates that did not go past the first date, eventually I learned how to beat that part... While there were some inconsistencies here and there, for the most part my progress was very linear, the girls not only got hotter, but they got cooler. My style changed, my attitude changed, even my boss said I became a more social person.

Once I got beyond the first date, it then started getting really expensive/time consuming, suddenly I was playing 3-4 girls at a time, I even chose not to have sex with hot girls - a choice I once never thought possible.

Rejections still happen, but when a girl dumps me now she's doing me a favor by weeding herself out, why would I ever want to be around someone who doesn't want to be with me?

Where am I now? Well I slept with 3 different girls in the last month, the first thing I did this year was have sex with a virgin FWB (literally, january first, 12:30 am). I am at a point where I am able to get multiple FWB's.

I learned a lot about myself through the process. I am not a relationship guy, I don't get jealous, I enjoy polygamy and don't like owning people, the idea of being "somebodies" boyfriend bothers me, in the same light, I don't like claiming a girl as mine either. I found out my true self and who I really am because of pickup, having the confidence and peace of mind lets you think clearly.

Having options in dating allows you to truly enjoy what YOU like, not just what comes to you, and that to me makes it all worth it.

2013-04-03T01:09:40+00:00

It took time, a lot of fucking time. 2 years ago I started reading up on the game. I tried going out after reading only on outer game, realized how hard it is to overcome AA. So i spent some time studying up on inner game, improving my confidence and learning how to value myself. After that I decided it's time to put my skills to the test and did as many approaches as I possibly could for about two months. Whether it was a straight up approach during the day, approaches at the bar or club, at a house party, everywhere.

The first few weeks weren't easy. I got rejected a couple of time but I didn't let it phase me. I learned from these rejections and improved myself dramatically. 2 months later I saw a huge improvement on my game, everything seemed easier and my confidence was through the roof. I continued improving my game with women since then. It's been 2 years since I started and while I'm no master, I've got a good handle on the game and am really fucking proud of how much the hard work has paid off.

TL;DR : studied outer game, then realized how important inner game was, then did a shit ton of approaches, then got good, continued improving since then.

Ossuari · 2013-04-03T02:34:57+00:00

Hey there well i started this a couple of months ago which has yield great results at the start. I got my first kiss and a girlfriend within a couple of months. I still havent had sex yet and still require massive work to improve myself to that level. I work as a salesman so approaching is like second nature to me now and i've have improved drastically. I have made quite a number of new friends and bonded with those i already knew but weren't close to.

I still have a long way to go but i'm 18 and i have my whole life ahead of me.

thisisgonnabe_good · 2013-04-03T03:07:48+00:00

As with many things, you get out what you put in.

NeverShaken · 2013-04-03T03:28:45+00:00

I really got started back in January 2012 (started reading long before that and even practised a little as well).

I participated in the 2012 StyleLife challenge, and by the end of the two weeks I had multiplied the number of people I had made out with in my entire life many times over, and had almost gotten an F-close.

Before that I had only had sex once (when I was 18 thanks to a random hookup with someone I met online), and had only made out with four people.

Those two weeks of essentially doing Mystery's "Newbie drill" gave me a huge amount of practice, and really kickstarted my improvement. Within a couple weeks after that of reading about and practising Mystery Method related styles and the Juggler Method, I was getting multiple makeouts per night, and pulling fairly consistently. I improved quickly enough that a year later I'm now up at 17 kills (2 threesomes) and have long lost track of the number of people that I've made out with.

Unfortunately, I'm now extremely rusty, as I haven't really gone out much in almost two months (just busy, no relationship).

To this date, I still have not overcome AA. I still kinda rely on my wing to kick my ass and get me to start approaching some nights (which I really shouldn't be doing), and there are some nights where I don't approach and instead just end up hanging out with my wing + whoever else is there.

And I guess that's a general overview of my history practising pickup. If you want to know anything more/specific, feel free to ask.

DeeMore · 2013-04-03T03:33:59+00:00

I dicked around blowing it halfheartedly with girls for about two years. After that I did a 45 day challenge, went out almost every night and talked to some 400 girls over the summer. Came back to campus and got laid with a girl who I found very attractive. It didn't work out with her so I hooked up with her coworker. Since then, no girls in my life. For about four months that is.

Not stressed though, this summer I'm going to hit it hard and make progress. Fuck man, the by far the hardest part was getting laid for the first time. After that, I expect great things from me

amyers · 2013-04-03T04:15:46+00:00

It will be diff depeding on your current starting point. If youre socially awkward you need to socially calibrate yourself with men and women, before even trying "game". Otherwise youre going to creep ppl out.

I was always socially calibrated, quick witted, i guess cocky-funny but didnt know that was a thing. Thing is, i couldnt only let that side of me out around close friends and family. I thought the popular kids and hot girls were better than me, they wouldnt laugh at my jokes, etc.

After i truly started to believe that noone was better than me i was more comfortable letting my true self out infront of strangers.

From that point, it took about a year and i was really Good at using my personality to get girls.

DevonAero · 2013-04-03T05:04:56+00:00

Just like everyone else one here I was AFC, but I wouldn't admit that until now. Last summer really got me. I was visiting my brother in Atlanta, and I made a promise to myself I'd talk to girls. So, I read a few books on pickup (didn't understand them) and watch a lot of videos. Mission accomplished, I talked to a shit ton and got a few numbers. But, I had no idea what the fuck I was doing. Which let to me fucking up on one of the most beautiful (HB9) I've ever seen. I made a promise to myself to never let that happen again.

In September, though I've had this account for a year, I started redditing regularly. I searched for a product review of a pickup book I was reading and found this place. Best stumble upon ever. I read so many FR's and other top posts, but I still didn't get them. I'd still get extreme AA, and lose focus (become out of state).

I have no idea how this happened, but one morning I woke up and suddenly got it. Everything from getting over my AA, kino, escalation, my game plan, etc. Now, not only do I have better "game". My friendships are stronger and meeting new people is easier. I've even developed a few ideas of my own. My game is no where near perfect (yet), but I'm very impressed and proud of the progress I've made over these few months. Congrats on your success too bro!

skgoa · 2013-04-03T10:03:21+00:00

I was 14 or 15 when I 'acquired' pickup material for the first time via Kazaa or emule or something like that. (I.e. over 10 years ago.) It was Ross Jeffrey's dreadful NLP bullshit. I thought "this is never going to work", and discarded it. I also found David deAngelo's Double your Dating amongst other such material but never really paid much attention to it, since I had already concluded that all seduction manuals were scams.

Much later (i.e. I believe 3 or 4 years ago) I bought The Game by mistake, since I thought it was related to the movie. It was an eye-opener for sure. I had been very interested in psychology and in human behaviour before but now was the first time that I read explanations for many odd things I had noticed, and which conventional wisdom had been unable to explain. But unfortunately that book and indeed the PUA community at the time advocated very indirect game, which just wasn't right to me. (I always feel like I'm decieving the girl when I try indirect game, and I simply hate dishonesty.) But still, I began to notice more and more little things in my interactions with others, but also in how other people's interactions went, that made me realise that there was something going on here.

I sporadically looked for PUA techniques on the interent, and once again found David deAngelo's material. This time around, I paid attention. Well, I paid some attention. Truth be told, I had the material in audiobook form, and fell asleep or didn't listen at many points, so my understanding of pickup was still extremely spotty at best. I didn't really realise at that time but I underwent an incredible transformation. Before I was the archetypical loner nerd permavirgin AFC 'nice guy', who rellied on sheer luck (or at least that was what I thought at the time) to score. Suddenly, I became popular. I became the focal point of my social group, and women reacted very very well to me. I hadn't had much sex for years at that point but suddenly I was attractive! Even though I was a fat, hairy, glasses-wearing, skin-condition-afflicted nerd who couldn't dance, knew nothing about music or other cool stuff, and didn't have the first idea about what clothes look good! It seemed as if I almost couldn't even have a nice conversation with a woman without her being attracted. Indeed I had some very confusing (at the time) issues with women who thought there was more going on, when I thought we were just friends...

And might I remind you: at that time, I didn't really know much about pickup, other than general principles of attraction. But I didn't need to have a gameplan, I just believed in the possibility of me being attractive, and I had a ton of fun flirting with women, that was all it took. The rest was simply learning from my mistakes. (I.e. learning stuff that I should probably have learned during puberty...) I just got better at conversations, and connecting with people. Not by actively working on myself but simply by having a normal university/social life. Some people who have no clue about pickup even said I was a natural, and that they were amazed what I could get away with in my interactions with women. But truth be told I simply did what I felt was right, going by the few snippets of pua theory I remembered, and by the experiences I made.

Around a year or so ago I joined reddit, and by chance found seddit after reading Neil Strauss's AMA. I have since learned a lot more pickup theory but overall I don't think my game has improved a lot from that. I now know that I really had no clue before, and just like the OP I feel that I never had to put that much work into pickup. Maybe if I read all the great material available, and go out every night, I will become a mPUA. But that's not what I'm after and that's not the point I'm trying to make here.

And that point is: no matter who you are or how attractive you think you are, there is actually nothing that holds you back, other than your own limiting believes. Reading one more FR won't help you. Memorising one more technique won't improve your game. You have to go out there, and talk to people. It's all about confidence. It's all about just having the balls to do more and to go farther than all the other AFCs. There is nothing you need to know, and definitely nothing you need to posses or be. It's incredible how different the world is when you "simply" don't have these imaginary limits anymore.

If it takes you a year of going out every night to get this confidence, then that is right for you. If it doesn't take more than a few positive experiences, like it seems to have been the case for the OP, and for me, then that's also fine. Everyone is different.

Charizard_gets_tail · 2013-04-03T15:07:50+00:00

I had been in a LTR for years, and was recently single. It was pretty quick for me - I've been in a new city for 3 months and my progress has been enormous with the stuff on here.

kabrandon · 2013-04-03T16:55:28+00:00

It's pretty interesting to read your last paragraph. I'm only 5 hours into The Blueprint Decoded by RSD, but it seems like a big message they tried to get across was, "don't worry about how other people perceive you. Your reality is the only important one." It's interesting to me that you switched to being apologetic for what you're saying. If I'm wrong, please tell me where my misconception is. As I said, I'm only about 5 hours into that seminar.

nfg91 · 2013-04-03T20:10:13+00:00

I've been improving myself for a year and a half now. I went from never kissing anyone at age 20 to having several interactions, hookups, numbers, etc (still haven't got laid) a year and a half later. It has definitely been a huge night and day improvement. I've changed myself personality wise and looks wise (for the better). I only go out like twice a week on the weekends. I'm happy for how far I've come but a lot of the time definitely wish I could be a lot better than what I currently am.

The thing is that people can go out 5 days a week and not make progress (or make a little bit over a long period of time) if they aren't constantly pushing themselves to do take new steps forward with their personal progress.

The biggest things that have helped me so far have been not caring too much about anything woman related. Being confident, and being fun/enthusiastic/not afraid to talk when the time comes to talk.

My biggest downfall has been being picky with women. I know what "my type" of girl is, and some nights I just won't see any girls in the bar that I want to talk to or would feel good about hooking up with. I only want to talk to something I feel I deserve or would be happy with, so many weekends, I don't get any numbers or hookups etc. But when I see something I want, I go for it and I am confident doing it.

On the flipside, I have friends who have a lot lower standards and will often get laid, and hookups, but 7 out of 10 times the girl is not good looking to me, and the other 3 it'll be a pretty hot girl.

Title	How fast was your progress?
Author	sedditderpaway
Upvotes	40
Comments	19
Date	April 2, 2013 11:57 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1bjvxy/how_fast_was_your_progress/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-fast-was-your-progress.1349894 https://theredarchive.com/post/1349894

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