How to not get sad when comparing yourself to more attractive men/past lovers?

youlovethisish · 2015-10-05T22:10:56+00:00

1) Realize that while looks are a large portion of the way you value women, looks are not a small portion of the way women value you.

2) Your gf is with you because of the way you make her feel - and the moment you become insecure, you're going to stop making her feel good. So get that shit of your head.

3) You need to be a confident, secure enough person that you can handle being single. Your gf shouldn't be such a huge pillar of your happiness - she is the cherry on top, not the whole damned cake.

4) Read Models by Mark Manson.

SmoothPrimal · 2015-10-05T22:15:53+00:00

Lol they better be good looking. I often get turned off when I find out I'm dating a girl that dated some ugly fucking dudes. I feel like its demeaning to me since I could possibly be ugly since she chose me.

RespondsWithImprov · 2015-10-06T01:33:34+00:00

Weak sauce.

I have none of these issues because I see myself as the party. Wherever I go, the party goes. That means if a girl leaves, the party is still here. If she goes with another guy, the party is still here. If another guy seems to be doing well, that is great, but the party goes with me. If you actually believe this like I do, no issues.

TheXXL · 2015-10-06T09:09:22+00:00

Stop looking at it from a male perspective. Look at it from a female perspective. Women always talk about how looks are important or how good looking this guy is etc. But then, they are just talking about it. I only know very few women that choose their partner because of the good looks, and even within those very few cases, they ended up marrying totally different guys, with very different personalities and looks, and mostly not that "good looking" as these stupid magazines and tv-shows trying to make us believe is good looking.

What i learned from my female friends is this: They tend to put value into looks at first, since this is the only thing they know about a guy that they just saw. Then they fantasize about how good they must be personality wise and sexually, but they rarely take a chance with them. Then, some guy comes along that they don't call "cute","sexy" or "good looking" and they get to know him. After a while they get together and all is fine, just because he had this "thing". Something they cannot describe, personality, charisma, etc. This shows that women say one thing, and then do the other, so bottomline is, looks are helpful to get the attention and value without doing anything, but without personality it won't do shit. On the other hand personality, confidence etc. are worth much much much much more than looks.

So in your case, you got the girl, treat her the right way, be confident, be fun, give her good sex, and you will not have to worry about the looks of other guys.

miyagikai91 · 2022-02-04T10:45:47+00:00

It’s been years. If you see this, how have you been?

Title	How to not get sad when comparing yourself to more attractive men/past lovers?
Author	sedditseddit
Upvotes	0
Comments	9
Date	October 5, 2015 9:35 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3nmk99/how_to_not_get_sad_when_comparing_yourself_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-not-get-sad-when-comparing-yourself-to-more.1395446 https://theredarchive.com/post/1395446

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