I'm 23 years old and have zero experience with women. Is there any hope for me?

Rockpyle · 2014-12-08T03:34:42+00:00

No. Improve yourself and improve your life. Attracting women isn't necessarily about looks. You have to be a confident person and right now this post tells me you have no confidence. Women can detect that.

ithearrow · 2014-12-08T06:06:04+00:00

Well First off lets just say that there's never a age where you stop improving so you can definitely do things that will help make you a more attractive man. Here is a comprehensive list of things you can do to improve your current situation. I will focus on lifestyle, emotion and communication.

Lifestyle

find hobbies (instrument, dance class, etc.)
find friends that you enjoy being with
Start dressing well (/r/fashion)
make FEMALE FRIENDS and get some experience with being comfortable around attractive women
Find/be in a career you love that makes you want to do more than what it asks for
Get a gym membership, work out 3-5 times a week. (/r/fitness) Emotions
The only way to overcome anxiety is to embrace it, not fight it( give in and accept the fact that you have to get worse before becoming better)
Realize that since you're first starting out with talking to women, you will mess up you will fail and you will make mistakes, embrace this, and set your ego aside when you approach women.
Make a list of excuses you make when you approach women, try to be conscious of all the excuses you make when you see that hot women you want to approach, and work on eliminating them (approach approach approach)
You are beautiful, tell yourself this everyday in the mirror. (if you don't believe it, some guy on reddit told you so head up!)
See a therapist. It seems like you have some internal issues, and they could actually help you with your overall confidence.

Communication

Learn how to flirt(push/pull, cocky/funny, storytelling) search this stuff online
have your head up, look people in the eye, shoulders back. Practice this body language forever. You are a badass.
The strongest way to approach a women in the street and the most honest way is to state your intentions (if you find her attractiev, tell her this)
If you are completely terrified with women. Start with saying hi to 10 strangers per day. Do this for 10 days. Start then asking strangers for the time for 10 times/day for 10 days. Then start asking ugly women the time for 10 times/day. Then you approach the women you percieve to be beautiful and tell them that you find them attractive/good looking.
Talk about your dreams, fears, passions, hobbies, things about yourself as well as the women
Learn more about women, dig deeper. Ask them deep questions such as how they view the world. Share your views of the world.
Initate kino with women. Start small by touching their shoulders briefly for 1 second, giving them hugs at the end of the interaction. Then try to hold her hand/do more physical moves such as longer hugs, kissing, make outs

Pretty much my 2 cents, and my quick summary of an attractive man. Alot of this stuff is things I've learned from Mark Manson's Models. Honestly man, there is NO AGE LIMIT for when you want to get something out of life, I honestly suggest you get a therapist and start fixing your issues as women won't solve your insecurities. Long-term change will be REALLY hard for you. But i believe in you, if you don't, just remember that a guy named ithearrow on seddit said that he believes in you. All the best. I hope you see some success :)

uhhthatguy · 2014-12-08T04:39:28+00:00

My suggestion for this is basically what /u/Rockpyle said: work on your inner game. To actually answer your question: yes, there is hope for you.

You asked how to develop confidence if you keep getting rejected. I'm inclined to respond with my own question: why do you think the two are related? Self-confidence is not tied to success with women (at least it shouldn't be).

I boiled down confidence to one thing for me: knowledge. If I know a lot about something, I'm comfortable with it. For example, if I somehow end up in a conversation about metal music, I'm very confidence and comfortable because it is something I know a lot about and am passionate about. With this in mind, I've gathered more knowledge on more things, which in turn makes me more confident with more things. Do the basics (hit the gym, get your diet in order, groom yourself) and take baby steps.

imnotfunnyAMA · 2014-12-08T04:18:23+00:00

Wait until your 40. Tell a single or married coworker that's in your age bracket. Nostalgic feelings of youth will come back. She'll most likely wanna be the one who takes the virginity. Get naked. Look her in the eyes. Whisper so softly.

I am not in love with you. I'm in love with Steve Carrell.

nadlam · 2014-12-08T04:42:30+00:00

Absolutely not my friend, not at all. I would agree that it is the hardest thing in the world to have confidence when you have absolutely no idea where to start.

When I faced that situation a few years ago, it seemed like I'd never get a girl. I had the worst game in the world, and it seemed like all my friends were just doing great with women.

I highly recommend signing up for some dating advice newsletters- some names I have really learned a lot from are Jason Capital, David Wygant, Josh Pellicer (Tao of Badass), and Bobby Rio. These guys do not teach pick-up artist tricks, but things like how to build rock-solid confidence, the right mindsets to have, how to carry yourself as an attractive man (because at your core, you are. Society has played a big part in reducing man-hood.), how to hold a conversation, flirt, get sexual, etc.

I have bought products and signed up for newsletters from all these guys, and they have helped me a ton. Best of luck my friend.

pressthebuttonfrank · 2014-12-08T13:57:32+00:00

Focus on other things in your life. Go to school, work on a career not a job. Exercise, go to church and civic functions to meet people. Not as a dating ritual but a means of getting out and meeting people in a friendly manner. Don't focus on a relationship at this point in your life.

Haliwr · 2014-12-08T03:37:54+00:00

I'm so god damn depressed because I can't get a single woman

That's a pretty big reason not to be interested in someone.

R3cko · 2014-12-08T08:00:14+00:00

Never too late. Read this. Rinse. Repeat. http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person/

BadBadBrownStuff · 2014-12-08T09:32:37+00:00

There's always hope. Better late than never

nofapfuzzy · 2014-12-08T20:21:17+00:00

To give you an accurate answer you have to first answer the following questions:

1) How much effort are you willing to put into transforming yourself? Rate from 1 to 10.

2) How much time are you willing to put in to transform yourself? Give a numer of hours per day, days per week and weeks per year.

3) How much money are you willing to spend gathering the information and material needed to transform your love life, your sex life and your romantic relationships ? Amount of money per month.

I am curious of your reply...

ocantu1987 · 2014-12-08T21:15:04+00:00

man this thread has helped me. I have been in a dry spell with women, I have had a few brutal rejections from women recently that have knocked me down. I also have been told I was good looking plenty of times, but I have always had trouble getting women. got to get started on inner game :)

drgreenair · 2014-12-08T04:50:32+00:00

Hey man, I'm currently also 23, and I started working on my social skills almost a year and a half now. And I have to say, I'm just getting a grip of my self esteem. But I urge you to keep going, I haven't felt more content with myself ever, and I wouldn't trade anything to go back to what I was before. I think Winston Churchill once said if you're going through hell, keep going.

Letmejumpyourbones · 2014-12-08T09:03:29+00:00

Nope. You're a lost cause. Might as well start lookingn for some dick to suck.

But seriously bro...you're only 23, fuck you. Learn about inner game before you dive into pickup, will save you a lot of stress.

vivasalt · 2014-12-08T07:48:22+00:00

it is not up to hope, it is up to stop being a lazy ass. the net is full with self-improvement blogs. find one , improve yourself. ne excuses

Title	I'm 23 years old and have zero experience with women. Is there any hope for me?
Author	rawrimangry
Upvotes	29
Comments	28
Date	December 8, 2014 3:32 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/2om16w/im_23_years_old_and_have_zero_experience_with/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/im-23-years-old-and-have-zero-experience-with.1380628 https://theredarchive.com/post/1380628

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