Keep getting friendzoned after dates

Jon_Boopin · 2017-12-17T17:56:30+00:00

A few tips.

Be honest and open about yourself in conversation. Its a date. You're getting to actually know the person, getting laid is just a result of successfully attracting each other.
Don't be too flirtatious. Kino is good. But don't be too direct with your sexual intentions because that shows you are only looking for something in return for calling her "sexy".
Always, always always go for the kiss at the end of the first date. That says "I am interested in you, and I would like to do this again." Not going for the kiss or going for a hug or handshake just puts yourself in the "Friendzone".
Read Models by Mark Manson. It will give you the full in depth guide to a successful date.

BallerGuitarer · 2017-12-17T22:11:44+00:00

This has happened to me with the last 3 girls I dated. Went on two dates with each of them and they all said we would be better as friends.

My theory is that I hadn't kissed them by the end of the second date. Honestly, I like to take things slow. My process has always kind of been to get to know the girl, which can develop to feelings, which leads to the kiss.

Now I'm thinking girls kind of take it as a rejection if you don't attempt a kiss. I remember one of my female friends describing how she met her boyfriend (now husband). She said it was a blind date, it went well, but she was upset that the guy only kissed her on the cheek at the end of the date. They kissed by the second date though.

My conclusion is that girls are looking for someone to essentially sweep them off their feet. If you're not going to do that within two dates, you're no different than a friend to them.

iuliua · 2017-12-18T00:00:29+00:00

More than 90 percent of communication is non-verbal. What you say is really irrelevant if you body language is not natural,relaxed and genuine. It's hard to tell if a girl likes your or not , they can disguise it very well to avoid any friction. When you think a date in terms of kino, call her sexy, tease her you look like a robot most probably. Sorry, but without seeing you in action is almost impossible to give relevant advice. 1. don't ask yourself if she likes you or not, this mindset is very dangerous and shows in your body language. Instead try to find out if you actually like her( this will make you look like a man who have his shit together). 2. don't kiss, kino unless you get signs from her. 3. you say they like you when they obviously don't so you have no idea what you are talking about, pay more attention to their body language. Sorry to be so blunt but there is no nice way to say this. Most guys are painfully clueless.

bakedphilosopher · 2017-12-18T03:26:57+00:00

Wow this keep happening to me too! I've been on dozens of dates on OKC, and me and the woman seem to have a real nice time, but the next day I get a message saying we'd be better off as friends. I don't get it.

I went on a date just the other day, me and the girl had a really nice time. A great conversation and seemed to have a lot in common.

Next day I get a message saying she didn't think we were a good match... I'm totally at a loss already and it's making me depressed and frustrated.

stevenmarkryan · 2017-12-18T03:58:44+00:00

I usually don't go for the make out at the first date

That's your problem. If you don't go for the kiss and the girl likes you, she'll feel rejected and you'll be friend-zoned almost every time.
If she likes you, she will kiss you. Great.
If she doesn't, you'll get her cheek. Move on.

UrDadHasCholls · 2017-12-17T17:55:01+00:00

The problem is u farted and they smell it and go ew gros

Steve_Savage · 2017-12-17T20:19:55+00:00

Forget about kino, kiss "closes". The only touching you should start with is hands. Boob, ass, shoulder grabbers are creepy. What gets you a 2nd date is impressing her with your confidence, your dress, your poise, your decisionmaking and of course your looks.

NoloRadio · 2017-12-18T07:42:12+00:00

If you're going on dates from apps/websites, or from people you meet via cold approaching, you're not getting 'friendzoned,' you're just getting rejected, but with a little emotional padding to try and reduce the possibility of you (and when I say 'you' I mean any guy these girls reject) going berserk and blowing up their phone or threatening them. Most if not all of these girls don't actually want a platonic friendship, they're just letting you down easy.

This is its' own problem, but it isn't the same as being 'friendzoned.'

Also, 5 dates isn't a lot. Not saying you don't have room for improvement, but keep plugging.

Not_unique_enuf · 2017-12-18T08:59:19+00:00

[permanently deleted]

fantasma9 · 2017-12-18T03:17:34+00:00

Living in Europe I find a bit hard to grasp the whole date concept. I mean, if she said yes to your invitation and you made clear about your intentions.

Wouldn't be just logical that at some point of the night you kiss her or invite her back to your place? Maybe is a cultural thing but there's no way I'd go out with a girl and don't test the waters at least just to be sure how everything will play out.

Simple stuff like holding her hands while telling something, seating a bit closer or ordering some tequila shots.

it's a make or break thing and you will know what's the deal right after. Perhaps, there're some hidden date rules specific to the US market? Not sure, but everything seems a bit outlandish.

AudioRebellion · 2017-12-17T23:11:58+00:00

"Dates" are too much pressure for girls these days. They assume marriage and long term commitment is your main goal and shut it down before it can get going.

Dates can only work if you're extremely good looking and/or you have very very good skills.

Your best bet is to keep it casual and invite her along when you get some errands done.

Title	Keep getting friendzoned after dates
Author	Not_unique_enuf
Upvotes	20
Comments	35
Date	December 17, 2017 5:07 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/7kewgk/keep_getting_friendzoned_after_dates/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/keep-getting-friendzoned-after-dates.1438610 https://theredarchive.com/post/1438610

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