Kick ass everywhere else, just can't do bars. Need advice.

anonybus · 2010-11-25T16:06:05+00:00

I don't like bars for exactly the reasons mentioned. If I do go to a bar its because I'm meeting up with girls and not trying to meet new girls. Someone once told me work towards your strengths and its the best advice I think I've gotten in a long time. I think its better to focus on developing the strengths already have than banging your head on the wall trying to overcome some minor shortcomings.

EncasedMeats · 2010-11-25T17:43:34+00:00

One way to get an "in" at a particular bar is to become a regular. Have lunch there a couple times a week, come in with a book or work early in the evening on a weekday.

Basically, get to know the staff. Knowing the bartender is, in my experience, the single best way to feel comfortable in a bar. The bartenders' positive, enthusiastic response to you is also a signal to the other patrons that you are cool and not a serial killer.

The better the staff knows you, the more information they will send your way. Like, "those girls over there were checking you out" or "she's just gotten over a break-up."

Granted, this is the lazy man's way of meeting chicks but damn, it works a treat.

2010-11-26T02:17:21+00:00

If you're doing well everywhere except bars, you're doing better than most people on Reddit. Don't sweat it.

LesbianPUA · 2010-11-25T17:35:07+00:00

I actually prefer clubs to bars. People are just more horny, and many are more in the mood to meet new people. Yea, they are even more noisy, but it's a great excuse for kino and positioning yourself in their personal space.

Also, most places let people outside to smoke these days. This is a great opportunity to isolate a little and have a conversation. Even if you don't smoke, you can ask her to come outside for some fresh air and a chat.

2010-11-26T02:08:09+00:00

Depends on the bar, really. Clubs are usually just you described, and some bars are like that, but only on weekends.

The key is to keep going to the same bar until it becomes a home away from home. That's how you network, hang out and meet new people, go to after parties, etc. Also, consider taking up smoking- at least socially. A lot of times all the real socializing goes on outside where the smokers are hanging out, away from all the noise and cramped interiors.

throwaway42 · 2010-11-25T16:01:03+00:00

If it's a bar with a dancefloor, try and get them to dance with you. Smile at them openly and make a come-hither gesture.

If there is no dancefloor, try and get them into your group, for example with an opinion opener.

cheddarchexmix · 2010-11-25T19:24:44+00:00

I hang out mostly in bars that aren't very loud, especially the ones with outdoor areas where people mill around / smoke / etc. I find it the best environment for meeting women.

2010-11-26T13:33:52+00:00

I have the same problem with noisy environments. It's like my brain can't handle so much stimulus and this makes socialising difficult.

Title	Kick ass everywhere else, just can't do bars. Need advice.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	16
Comments	19
Date	November 25, 2010 3:33 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ebns7/kick_ass_everywhere_else_just_cant_do_bars_need/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/kick-ass-everywhere-else-just-cant-do-bars-need.1313217 https://theredarchive.com/post/1313217

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