Long time between approach/first text and date = guaranteed flake

ProfitisAlethia · 2026-04-03T14:34:08+00:00

Some people in the comments are ripping into you harder than they need to. I just wanted to say you did a hell of a job approaching and setting up dates dude. Good job. 90% of the people in this sub are lurkers who never get the balls to talk to women.

When you're in the interaction with the girl focus on getting her as invested as possible and don't ask for the number until you can tell she's really into it. This weekend I met a girl at a bar, I walked her back to her car and we were having great conversation, but I never asked for the #. Eventually, when we were saying goodbye she jumped and asked me for my number and we went on a date two days later.

I also struggle to text between dates and I prefer not to, so I feel your struggle. This looks like it was just unlucky timing on your part but you leaned a lesson. Don't beat yourself up and keep practicing!

Back2theCouture · 2026-04-03T12:12:29+00:00

You lost the momentum.

This is why like in night games you either closing on the spot or you fail. The next day after going to the club, the wild girl goes back to her regular self, to her boring world. The sparks are gone. So when a guy asked her out the next day, majority of the time nothing is gonna happen.

Same thing with day game. Either you go out with her in less than a week, or you keep maintaining the convo until you meet her again. I always prefer the former. Them saying “I can’t this week” is typically a signal it’s not gonna go nowhere.

OpinionThink481 · 2026-04-03T16:14:48+00:00

Yes, attraction is a fleeting emotional moment. This is why it’s often said that you have to strike when the iron is hot, meaning that if you can go on a date today you should not leave it for tomorrow, and if you can kiss now don’t leave it for a few minutes later, etc…

Interest of a woman today is no guarantee of interest a day later or even a few minutes later. Don’t assume her interest is set in stone, it can shift like the weather and usually those fleeting emotions will play against you.

CibrecaNA · 2026-04-03T08:59:25+00:00

Yeah bro if you go quiet for ten days, she'll think you're just an asocial loser. You can talk somewhat in between. Good morning. How's your day. Super busy type shit type shit. Obviously radio silence won't get you a date. You're clearly a player, ghoster, stranger.. in her mind. Not that those are bad but you likely won't get a date from that impression.

Melodic-Author1317 · 2026-04-03T11:54:11+00:00

Yeah, women forget attraction or start questioning it if there is too much silence.

Learning to text engaging questions that can lead to light flirting might be what you’re missing. It builds up a small history of attraction before the date.

Otherwise the chick might feel like she was tricked into attraction when you first met and bail.

But follow-up flirting is very dependent on how strong your first interaction was with her so also make sure you don’t hastily leave once you get the number

Hope this answers and helps!

Doki_Doki_Doki · 2026-04-03T14:21:05+00:00

yeah, you left too much space, man. a little more texting keeps the vibe alive. don't suffocate, but drop a playful message or two. keep the connection warm till the date. balance is key.

Excellent-Archer-238 · 2026-04-03T17:00:59+00:00

1 week is like 1 year in women's time perception. Things can change a lot so you need to take some action before the date.

KidKannabis · 2026-04-03T21:00:05+00:00

Strike when the Iron's hot.

Always. This extends to escalating physical touch & sex as well. The window of opportunity is short.

themajinhercule · 2026-04-03T08:49:15+00:00

Why were you texting and not talking.

If you talked to them and they told you to get lost...would it make a difference?

Title	Long time between approach/first text and date = guaranteed flake
Author	L15A1
Upvotes	22
Comments	27
Date	April 3, 2026 8:44 AM UTC (3 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1sb8385/long_time_between_approachfirst_text_and_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/long-time-between-approachfirst-text-and-date.1577048 https://theredarchive.com/post/1577048

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