Need help/advice with conversation.

mhys33 · 2026-06-23T01:33:57+00:00

Focus on opener, hook (like a compliment) and then get the contact.

But ofc, your intention mustn't be weird or creepy, let the conversation flow, not for too long, and then be like I gotta go meet a friend, but I'd love to hang out with you later.

Keeping it simple and spontaneous is always better than overt planning.

Infinite-Ear6466 · 2026-06-23T01:38:01+00:00

DM me

YinMaestro · 2026-06-23T02:16:26+00:00

Honestly playfully disagree. Or if she says something pertaining to herself be like, "oh you WOULD xxxx"

Special_Rice9539 · 2026-06-23T02:51:15+00:00

You can come at it from a technical angle studying how to be a more engaging speaker and also practicing telling stories and focusing on emotions and relationships over logic and outcomes.

Listen to two women talking to each other. Oftentimes the actual content is mundane, but they really dive into how they feel. When you’re vibing with people, you need to let go of the hyper-logical, task oriented way we normally converse as men.

You can listen to comedians to see how they use pauses, varying tone, pitch, volume, and cadence to be more engaging when they speak, how they use facial expressions, how they structure jokes, etc.

A huge sticking point is “trying for rapport.” An example I had was I used to fill awkward silences with some sort of getting to know you question, “where are you from?” Anything where you’re trying to pull her closer will make it seem like you’re more invested in the interaction. Now I’ll make a statement, “oh man I was watching love on the spectrum, have you seen that? I can’t believe they were allowed to make that show. Ngl I think I’d dominate it…” Honestly, just stopping those interview questions is huge. Neither of you care where the other person works.

Then there’s the inner game angle where you actually already know how to have an interesting conversation, but you stifle yourself automatically. That’s an entire field of study on it’s own, ranging from dealing with shame about sexuality, success barriers, innate fear of being killed by other males in the tribe, having an ego built around a cool self-image, fear of being cast out of the tribe, becoming more grounded as a person, understanding your own value, unravelling the frames social conditioning imposes on you, self-esteem issues… etc.

ImpossibleWaiting · 2026-06-23T08:50:02+00:00

Talk about relationships and sex. A decent question to ask is what kind of man she wants and what kind of relationship she wants.

epimpstyle · 2026-06-23T08:54:20+00:00

Have you tried just asking her for the information you want?

FindingNewLeaf · 2026-06-23T12:37:51+00:00

The advice I can give is to be curious about the other person. Have a mental checklist of things you want find out and get to know about them.

For example, you can have a mental checklist to try to find out what her profession is, her hobbies, favorite tv show, family brothers or sisters, what was her last relationship like, what was the worse date ever, craziest experience on a night out, biggest fantasy, favorite sexual position, last time they masturbated, etc...

It go increasing in intimacy and sexuality

Every time you spread it with your own curiosity by asking her to elaborate and sharing your own experience.

The topics on your mental checklist should reflect things you like, and should go from platonic to sexual.

Verge_Of_Despair · 2026-06-24T18:00:46+00:00

Ask open ended questions, as in questions that can't be answered with a yes or no, for example instead of asking "do you like sushi?" You would ask "what is your favorite food?" Closed ended questions can be answered with a simple yes or no ending the convo abruptly and giving you nothing to vibe off of so avoid those. Also remember how to vibe with her by threading, threading is free associating off something she said previously, for example, she says "yesterday I went skiing with my family, I love them so much, my little brother just lights up when we go to the snow", there are keywords you can free associate off of, what you did yesterday, skiing, family, love, siblings, things you light up about, and snow. You just take these key words and make a related statement off of them or ask a related open ended question. Well this should give you a strong foundation for what you're looking for, cheers.

abcsofattraction · 2026-06-25T20:11:33+00:00

Getting information from her is the wrong goal for early conversation. That's what's turning it into an interview and killing the escalation path.

The fix is the Banter Triangle. Level 1 is statements about her instead of questions. "Let me guess, you're the troublemaker of your friend group." No question mark. You're reading her, not extracting data. She'll confirm, deny, or start qualifying herself to you, and all three move things forward.

Level 2 is us framing: "We’re getting a divorce, you keep the kids, I’ll take the house and the boat." That's your escalation ramp.

Level 3 is romantic or sexualized us statements, but only after earning the first two like, “Why are you so obsessed with me? It’s like having my own personal stalker.”

The information you're looking for comes naturally once the tension is built. Trying to gather it upfront is what stalls the conversation.

Title	Need help/advice with conversation.
Author	Clay_Carm1n3
Upvotes	4
Comments	9
Date	June 23, 2026 1:27 AM UTC (1 month ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1ud3b12/need_helpadvice_with_conversation/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/need-helpadvice-with-conversation.1583422 https://theredarchive.com/post/1583422

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