Talking and making normal friends with girls, does it help?

Back2theCouture · 2025-10-07T01:41:55+00:00

Being attracted to a girl is totally normal. Doesn’t mean that you’re in love with her. It’s still far from that. Having said that, the most typical mistake a guy does is once he’s attracted, he’s turned into a simp.

You’re being attracted shouldn’t be an obstacle for you to treat her like any other girls. You can still tease her, banter with her. She’s not your girlfriend. At least not yet. Don’t treat her like she’s one.

burncushlikewood · 2025-10-07T01:50:16+00:00

I don't know what you're asking, being friends with girls is never bad, in fact it's a good thing, but I don't think its a good idea to make friends with girls just to meet girls, that's manipulative behavior, instead just be yourself, you don't need to seduce every woman you meet. If you want to get into non platonic relationships you need to set the tone sort of with women you're sexually attracted to, that's done by touch, eye contact, or creating sexual tension

srosete · 2025-10-07T08:04:26+00:00

It's normal, has happened to me a thousand times. Some advice I can give you from experience:

Don't enter a new friendship when you are already attracted. You will be subconsciously doing it because she's hot, and that's the worst possible way of initiating a friendship. I feel like friendships are easier and more genuine when I'm not really attracted.
If there's no scape from a friendship with a hot girl (i.e. she's part of a current friends group) or you develop feelings down the line, my advice is to be honest and upfront with her. The earlier, the better. Just let her know how you feel whenever she's around and interacts with you, no drama. If she still wants to keep the friendship going, maybe you are onto something. If you get sick of it and leave, it will be easier to understand for her.

Kierenbrowncoach · 2025-10-07T08:17:35+00:00

You’re not wrong for building female friendships. It helps you relax around women, read their cues better, and get used to feminine energy. But here’s the catch: being “comfortable” with women isn’t the same as being attractive to them. You’re training your social muscles, not your romantic instincts. When you talk to women you aren’t drawn to, there’s no pressure, no desire, no tension. That’s why it doesn’t translate. Attraction lives in tension, not comfort.

What you’re dealing with isn’t just anxiety, it’s pedestal syndrome. The moment you label a woman as special, your energy shifts. You start performing instead of expressing. You analyze every reaction instead of leading the interaction. The mind treats her as a prize you might lose, instead of a person you might connect with. That’s what creates the nervous energy you feel.

Stop trying to transfer your friend-zone confidence into attraction. You need to build a separate skill, staying calm when stakes feel high. Start small. Flirt in low-pressure moments. Hold eye contact longer than usual. Say something playful instead of safe. The goal isn’t perfection, it’s familiarity. Once your nervous system realizes you can survive attraction without overthinking, that tension becomes fun instead of fear.

Certain_Process_7657 · 2025-10-07T14:32:55+00:00

Yes it's good to be friendly and practice talking to women but I wouldn't try the long game approach of pretending to be friends with her for months and then finally making a move.

BlancaNieves001 · 2025-10-07T17:12:45+00:00

I think you need to understand that women are human beings like you.

Talking and making friends with girls helps for sure.

When you are able to talk to normal and beautiful girls, you see women in a different way.

ExcitableSarcasm · 2025-10-07T17:43:04+00:00

Tbh, not really beyond a ceiling.

I have multiple close friends who are girls. That they are girls is good to get you out of the headspace of "women are a different species. However I've found a lot of them don't have single friends to introduce me to (if that is a secondary goal) nor are they that good at helping you attract girls you're interested in, since every woman is different, and this includes having different preferences they assume is universal for women, but they're obviously not universal.

caesarfecit · 2025-10-07T20:32:56+00:00

I'll describe it like this.

Having female friends is good. It will reduce any sense of alienation you might feel with women, get more comfortable with them, and get better insight into the female mind. What it will not do as a general rule is help you get laid, with one notable exception that I'll cover later on.

Let's talk about some of the things you need watch out for:

Putting yourself in the friend zone. - You want to know how guys get in the friend zone? When a girl knows that a guy is into them, but he won't shoot his shot. Girls aren't stupid, and sooner or later a girl will suss you out, and lose respect for you as a man for not being honest and not acting with self-respect. That's why it's key to make a move sooner rather than later. But what it also means is that you should be very careful about striking up friendships with girls you find attractive. One thing you can try is just rip the bandaid off early and let her shoot you down. Then at least she knows and you know, and you're less likely to have repressed sexual tension blow up a friendship you've invested in.
Turning into an orbiter. - Girls love having guy friends because it's like having a boyfriend without having to commit. But a guy has to be careful here because a girl can take advantage and literally turn you into her backup boyfriend (which is just as bad, if not worse than the friendzone). The key to avoiding this is maintaining strong boundaries. If she's a friend then treat her like one - don't do favors for her that wouldn't do you a guy friend, don't take her out on dates, don't have an emotional affair with her.
Becoming too "safe". - This is the classic trap of guys who hang out with women too much. They become so used to filtering their masculine vibe and adopting a more feminine frame in order to relate to women better that it can become hard to snap out of it. You see this a lot with straight guys that women honestly mistake for being gay, or guys who have trouble polarizing or leading women. They lose their edge through force of habit. And the antidote here is to have guy time. Maintain your male friendships, keep up your masculine hobbies and stay centered in your masculine identity. There's nothing with being able to relate to women on their level - it can even become a flirting superpower when used properly. Just don't let it lead you into bad habits.

Now, the best way female friends can help you get laid is by improving your social circle game. Female friends can set you up with their friends, broaden your social network, or act as wing women, both in field and for things like fashion advice, social skill fine tuning, and if they're a really good friend, inner game work.

The key thing to understand is that you're not going to hook up with your female friends unless they make the first move, and if you let them, they can and will walk all over you and leave you a dried out husk. But, if you avoid the common prat falls and go into it with the right intentions and the right objectives, then it can be a very worthwhile thing, both in a dating context and in life in general. Just don't be naive, and don't delude yourself.

Title	Talking and making normal friends with girls, does it help?
Author	escape12345
Upvotes	9
Comments	13
Date	October 7, 2025 1:14 AM UTC (10 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1o018vk/talking_and_making_normal_friends_with_girls_does/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/talking-and-making-normal-friends-with-girls-does.1563595 https://theredarchive.com/post/1563595

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