Hey dudes –

So glad I decided to post TWiAS this week, because it reminded me of an amazing conversational technique which I'll talk about in the first two items below.

"This week in AskSeddit," if you haven't seen it before, is a round-up of some of the top posts in Seddit's companion subreddit AskSeddit, which is where beginner and/or specific-situation questions on pickup and seduction should go.

Without further ado:

#1. It's not that I have AA, it's just that I really don't know what to fucking say after a certain point..

So KolHaKavod has no trouble with approaching – respect, dude – but finds his mind going blank in that initial "death-zone of awkwardness" during the first few minutes after you've approached.

Worth noting is that he doesn't seem to feel like he needs to eject or radically rework his approaches – like Tofu has said, you just need to plow through those few awkward minutes until some comfort is established and things flow more naturally. So OP just wants to figure out how to keep his jaw moving.

And someone mentioned the awesome conversational technique I alluded to – conversation threading. I first read about it on seductionreview.com, which is down, but you can read a cached/copypasta version here.

Basically, instead of trying to invent shit out of thin air to talk about – which is great if you can pull it off, of course – you just riff off whatever the girl says. That doesn't mean she's leading the conversation, just that you're using key words as jumping off points. From that article:

If you come across a woman in a shopping mall and she says “I’m just shopping around for some jeans with my friends”, you know that you can thread off to talk about:

  1. Shopping (“There’s this store on the second floor you’ll love…”)
  1. Jeans (“I hope you’re not one of those who goes for ripped jeans”)
  1. Her friends (“Your friends seem like a great group of girls. How do you know each other?”)

Can you see how easy it can become with some practice? You can take any of the above responses and use them to keep the conversation going.

I think naturals and pros do this automatically, but for everyone else it's an awesome skill to learn.

So awesome, in fact, I reposted it in the comments on our next item:

#2. First date in 2 years.

HigherThanStars has the same problem as the previous guy – trouble keeping a conversation going – but there are additional complications. This first-order conversational problem creates a second-order confidence problem, to the point where he's nervous approaching or meeting OKC dates, because he's worried he'll freeze up in conversation.

I suppose one could say both of these problems are due to a deeper inner game problem, and one commenter went in that direction, noting OP's "inferiority complex" and trying to talk him out of it.

If that's right, here's the order of casuality: confidence problems > conversational problems > additional confidence problems. It's a vicious cycle.

Why am I splitting hairs here? To try to show why IMHO it probably won't work to just tell OP to relax and try to have fun. I mean, by all means try, but it reminds me of advice from girls to "just be yourself." Easier said than done.

Instead, IMHO the best short-term strategy for OP would be a concrete strategy like conversation threading, to try to get a positive cycle going: learning that skill should give him more confidence to approach, and success when he does, which in turn gives him more confidence. In the words of that article I quoted above:

If you can master this skill it will increase your confidence when it comes to approaching women, because you know how to start and fuel a conversation.

It's sort of like what I think I've heard Tofu (et al.?) say about Mystery Method. To paraphrase, it's a bunch of technical maneuvers that don't in themselves do shit for your inner game – you can memorize all the best openers and still feel all rainy inside. ;_; But they do equip you pretty well to go out and close some HBs, and that success improves your confidence.

But long-term, OP should probably work on his confidence issues directly. (Take that advice with a grain of salt – it's my gut read on these things, but I haven't gotten around to going through Blueprint or anything like it yet.)

#3. What do you do when a girl gives back a stare?

strangerdream is making confident eye contact with girls, and because he's a sexy bitch, they look right back at him. What should he do next??

A: Say hi.

(thanks to ImKumarYo)

Bonus post

(aka shameless plug for a question I just posted)

How can you "talk to everyone" when you have contempt for everyone? Serious question.