What should you be focused on while you are talking to girls? I can never focus because I get self conscious.

notaPUAthrowaway · 2013-04-30T23:25:38+00:00

What do you focus on when you're taking to a sibling or good friend?

Being present is different from mind-body awareness. It's almost the opposite. You want to get lost in the moment.

Here's an exercise:

Focus on creating a warm, happy, and sexually confident feeling inside yourself. Be a loving, caring don juan. Then extrovert it. Bring it from the inside to the surface. Feel your suave sexiness, your compassion, and your social spirit. That's the state you want to be in. Practice this meditation at home, then out in public and talking with people.

fappucino625 · 2013-04-30T23:47:10+00:00

I end up placing too much attention on my own facial expressions and body language.

This is why you need to internalize these behaviors. The point of practice, practice, practice, is so you don't have to think about these details. Focus on the process.

ysef95 · 2013-05-01T23:58:57+00:00

focus be mindful of your surroundings try to be all sherlock holmes and try to work out details, be present and enjoy the moment. Tomorrow meditate on the idea of a flowing river and how you will channel energy the same way it channels water, then when you start to feel self concious think again of the water flowing through and how this is you in the conversation, also you may start to piss more often

mm1255 · 2013-04-30T20:37:42+00:00

Focus on having fun. Who gives a shit what she thinks of you? If she happens to like you, good for you, a nice bonus. If not? At least you had a good time. Move on to one of the millions of other beautiful women waiting to talk to you.

Canei · 2013-04-30T21:59:19+00:00

Don't focus. Be in the moment. You're not thinking, you're just here and now. Thinking is the enemy. Truly. Awareness, if you truly have it, will eradicate self-consciousness.

ManiacApple · 2013-04-30T22:16:34+00:00

Ok, so essentially what people are saying is have fun, do whatever it is that is fun to you, and do NOT question it at all? There is a time for questioning and pondering and seriousness, and there is a time for fun, which you should not question or think about whatsoever.

For the most part, I am pretty serious about life in general. I have long term goals. I work on a fixed schedule, and when I work on something specific, I focus any and all thoughts on what I am doing. When I go to the gym, results and maximum efficiency are all that are on my mind. Any and all thoughts pertain to my workout and body. I do not let anything else enter my mind until the task is completed. It's hard to get out of this mode, and just be 'empty' and just try to have fun.

sonybravo · 2013-05-01T14:10:25+00:00

I just let them ask me questions and I respond and then I try to make laugh but fail.

recyclablebantha · 2013-05-02T03:47:16+00:00

What do you guys focus on during convo with a girl?

People have mentioned things like "be in the moment".......

For me, what that means is being fully aware of "now". If you are doing that, you are most distinctly NOT self-conscious, because that requires you to be inside your head, instead of aware of what's outside of you.

Being focused on your own body language, etc., that is important but when you're actually in-field, you need to be present.

So what to focus on..... your surroundings, what is happening right now, the things she is doing......etc. If you do that, the information you receive can help you open, and can also help you as you continue throughout the interaction. (If she's interested, she will essentially give you all the information you need, if you're not in your head. If you're in your head, you might miss something.)

Title	What should you be focused on while you are talking to girls? I can never focus because I get self conscious.
Author	ManiacApple
Upvotes	10
Comments	13
Date	April 30, 2013 8:05 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1dfl7k/what_should_you_be_focused_on_while_you_are/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/what-should-you-be-focused-on-while-you-are.1351536 https://theredarchive.com/post/1351536

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