Why do y’all neg?

recyclablebanthas · 2021-03-05T07:46:26+00:00

1

Why do y'all neg?

Some things we could unpack here:

Negging isn't mainstream "advice" here anymore and hasn't been for years.
It can be problematic to generalize. Some people neg. Some don't.

2

Seriously, I don’t understand it. It is such a turn off. I lose interest immediately and stop talking/interacting/responding.

Also, there's often a misunderstanding about negging by the people who are engaging in it.

Some might think it's some sort of technique to get people to like them.
Some might be engaging in it because of their own insecurity which may drive them to try and pull down those around them to make themselves feel better.
Some people attempting to tease over text me not realize how problematic it is to do something like that without the feedback they would get in real time, if they were in person.

3

Also, it bears mentioning that teasing can be perfectly fine and playful.

Problems arise when:

People are insecure and their teasing turns into backhanded compliments, etc.
When people attempt to tease other people they've never met over text.

revente · 2021-03-04T12:22:50+00:00

Who's even negging? I haven't seen a serious post advocating it in over a decade. Where did you even get this info? Some cheesy news report on 'manipulative pua'?

Shadow__Account · 2021-03-04T11:54:20+00:00

I think a good neg, estimates the level of confidence someone has and hits them just softly enough not to really sting. It's a calibration thing. Just like playing with your friends, If I know my fat friend is very insecure about being fat, I would never make a joke about it. But if I know it bothers him a bit but he is confident about it and he knows he will fix his weight issue. I can tease him with it and it will be a fun sparring thing, that is well intentioned! We are building each others defenses and making our insecurities weaker by joking about it, its a positive uplifting thing. Maybe you are very low self esteem ( don't mean that in a judging way) and therefore these negs don't make sense to you. I have had many instances where people are trying to be funny but they hit on someone's insecurity and its just so far from funny to me, so I definitely get the feeling. An important factor in all of this, is the intent you think someone has and that in combination with hitting an insecurity seems to be the issue with you. When the vibe is good and playful and you know someone is a good person and doesn't mean anything bad and is just teasing you, a neg can be great and fun. Lets say you have to pick between 2 dresses and you cant choose and you ask me does this yellow one make me look old? and I tell you no you look great in it, take that one. And later on in the evening I tell you you look amazing tonight, just too bad you chose your grandma's dress to wear. You would know I was purely joking about an insecurity you had earlier and you'd also know I was being honest about it looking good on you and just confronting you a bit with an unnecessary insecurity you had in a playful uplifting way.

freethinking123 · 2021-03-05T00:04:06+00:00

Wow this is the toxic female chick to avoid, "across all platforms".. So full of shit.. And uses "neg," to get attention like a pro dater. Then defines it as the original term in English anyway... Still not sure why the guys try to distance themselves? but fail..She's a twister. Anything you say will be re-engineered all the while she pretends to pose an innocent question. As you get accused and back peddle meanwhile she shamelessly plug how if she dumps those guys they can't handle it and all pursue her on ALL PLATFORMS, lol Ya... Only guy that persues her ON ALL PLATFORMS, is the guy she sufficiently F's with so he thinks he needs to apologise as his heads spinning after she gives him a leading comment, but says too bad, if ya just hadn't said BLANK-____

Talk about reverses..

And it was Tom Lycus who was on the radio everyday 10 + yrs ago talking about the Back Handed Compliments.

pdxtrader · 2021-03-04T23:30:54+00:00

A neg only works on attractive girls. If you read the book “The Game” by Neil Strauss he goes in depth. Average looking girls you don’t really need to neg.

thegoldengoat19 · 2021-03-05T01:09:20+00:00

Negs are meant for girls who are pretty attractive. They get their ego and esteem inflated daily by men around them. The woman is then expecting most men to be attracted to her and try and woo her. The neg is meant to throw her off and make her think “every other guy likes me, why doesn’t this one?” And she’ll usually assume that this man is of high value because he isn’t bowing down for him trying to get some pussy because he probably has a lot of other prettier girls. Negging is supposed to show her that the man sees her as lower status than himself. Works similar to disqualification. It definitely works if delivered properly at the right time. It needs calibration.

Captain_w00t · 2021-03-04T15:39:10+00:00

I neg because the mystery method is what made me lose my virginity.

I don’t preach negging the way Mystery and Style did. But if I’m talking to a girl who’s losing interest a creative neg or two makes it seem like I’m disqualifying her and not begging her for attention. Then we can step back and play with a little push pull.

It may be manipulative but I wouldn’t say it’s unethical.

Captain_w00t · 2021-03-04T09:24:54+00:00

Why do y’all neg?

well, not all. only a part of people which thinks it works. usually unexperienced, insecure and needy people.

IMHO, it's the contrary of having confidence: rather than showing (and working on) confidence, neg tries to undermine others' confidence to balance it.

The term was coined and prescribed by pickup artists

partially wrong. the term was coined by an old so-called Pick Up Artist many years ago. His techniques are mostly flawed and are inspired by neediness, insecurity and, therefore, manipulation. it used to work only with a very small demographic made of very good looking (and insecure) girls.

I have look through so many potential negs...and none justify the action IMO.

I really don't know which one you've seen, but I can suppose you've read it in some article on the web.

A more realistic approach is teasing, which IMHO gives more reciprocal fun and isn't offensive or manipulative. The difference with negging is very thin and should be delivered the right way, otherwise it will be offensive anyway.

MOD NOTE: nowadays, there aren't many posts here still talking about "negs" in this sub. the topic comes out sporadically, and opinions may vary. In general, they aren't used anymore, neither considered effective.

Cramer4President · 2021-03-04T15:00:27+00:00

It works on me. Gets in my head and I just want more.

AmmoTuff182 · 2021-03-04T19:48:23+00:00

There’s a difference between teasing and negging. Unfortunately a lot of people think they’re teasing when they’re just being rude and disrespectful. It’s absolutely a turnoff and shouldn’t be tolerated.

An example of teasing would be flirting with a woman who’s into astrology and you’re not but being like “wait is my Jupiter rising?! Lol I’m acting like a Pisces” Vs negging which would look like “lol you actually believe that shit? It’s okay you’re a woman so I’ll give you a pass ;)”

One is lighthearted and not at all serious and the other is arrogant and disrespectful for no reason

Title	Why do y’all neg?
Author	TAblue22
Upvotes	9
Comments	32
Date	March 4, 2021 8:31 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/lxg20f/why_do_yall_neg/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/why-do-yall-neg.1510663 https://theredarchive.com/post/1510663

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