There is a guy at work who will make an assumption about me, assess my reaction, and then quickly change what he is trying to say, according to my reaction.

It’s hard to explain, but here’s an example.

Him: (flirtatious tone) I bet you’re the mom of your friend group.

Me: (offended) No, that’s more like my friend, ____. I’m not like that.

Him: Haha, yeah, I was going to say, “You seem more like the wild one to me.” 😏

Me: (offended again) Noooo… that’s not me either. I like to be in bed by 9.

Him: (carefully reading my expression) Soooo you’re more like… the grandma of the group??

Me: (smiles uncomfortably). Haha, I mean I guess you could say-

Him: (sees my smile and gets excited) I’M THE SAME! My friends always call me “old man”. That’s so funny! I can totally picture you frantically catching a cab home at 9, jumping into bed, and immediately crashing. Grandma 😏

The way he changes his tune so quickly and effortlessly really creeps me out. I hate that he acts like he knows me. I hate that he has a skewed perception of me. I’m always left trying to make sense of his assumptions “why would he think I’m the ‘mom’ of my friends? The wild one? The grandma??” And go home feeling horrible about myself.

Is this a form of negging/emotional manipulation? Or am I reading too far into this?