Ever wonder why you felt so used after a man you loved, cared for and bonded with did a 180 on you? Why you felt so betrayed and violated when he cheated, lied, misrepresented himself, or ghosted? It's because he didn't have your consent:

Consent should be informed

The person you have sex with should be able to give informed consent. This means that they are not too drunk, too high, too drugged, unconscious or asleep when sex begins. They should also furthermore, consent to have sex with you and not be deceived into consenting to sex with one person and end up having sex with someone else.

Although it doesn’t say it explicitly, manipulating someone into sex deprives them of their ability to give informed consent, as I mention here.

Informed consent. You can't consent to something when you don't have all the information. This applies not just in sex, but in relationships, in business, in all areas of life. So when you're starting to engage in sexual activity with them and you have information that you're specifically with-holding because you think they would change their mind if they knew, you're not giving them the opportunity to give informed consent. If you have an STI and you don't tell your partner, they're not giving informed consent. If you cheated and you don't tell your partner, they're not giving informed consent. Informed consent is important because if they're not consenting with all the information, they're not consenting at all.

If you manipulate someone into having sex with you (ie. if they would not have consented to sex if they knew something you are explicitly hiding, such as your true identity or that you have an STI or that you cheated) then they cannot have given informed consent. Sex without consent is rape.

-Lauren Campbell