What is alexithymia?

ioyarzunf · 2024-01-24T12:59:38+00:00

I cant wait to talk about how i feel so everyone will ignore me or make fun of me.

Ho6org · 2024-01-24T11:39:06+00:00

Feminists will tell You it's a yet another harm caused by patriarchy to men, but tell me - if it hurts men as much as it hurts women why do You keep calling it patriarchy?

TheTinMenBlog · 2024-01-24T11:34:55+00:00

We all struggle to describe how we’re feeling sometimes.

Words are a comparatively modern invention in comparison to the ancient realm emotions; and we should never expect the two to fit together so neatly.

Finding the perfect fitting word to that feeling in your stomach, the pain in your heart, or swirling sensation in your head, is a journey we are all on, and will likely never complete.

Ironically, there is actually a word to describe the inability to find the right words for feelings, and that is ‘alexithemia’ – literally translating as ‘without words for emotions’.

So too the concept of alexithymia has given birth to an interesting, yet under explored area of psychology, lead most notably by the world renowned Professor Robert Levant; who spent a career digging into the phenomenon.

Levant’s work tried to find out where alexithymia comes from, was it biological or socialised, or both?

Who is most impacted by alexithymia, and how can we help and better understand those affected find the words they need.

So have you struggled to describe how you feel?

Do you know someone who does?

And is it something we can change?

What do you think?

~

Images by Adrian Infernus, Kiwi Hug, Keagan Herman, Brytny Com, Falaq Lazuardi, Dylann Hendricks, Thought Catalog, Sincerely Media, Unsplash.

Study

thrownaway24e89172 · 2024-01-24T14:08:32+00:00

Some evidence suggests boys start life with greater emotional reactivity and expressiveness than girls, however, they become less verbally expressive than girls at about the age of two years, and less facially expressive by six years.

I vaguely recall in the past seeing studies showing gendered differences in response to babies cries, where IIRC, the same audio was interpreted as the baby being upset or temperamental when the listener was told they were hearing a male baby and interpreted as being afraid or in need of comfort when the listener was told they were hearing a female baby. I wonder how much of this lack of expressiveness in boys comes about from such relative lack of concern for their feelings? If crying leads to their caretakers growing exasperated with them rather than growing concerned for them, is it all that unexpected that boys would stop trying to vocalize their emotions?

Sinfultitan_001 · 2024-01-24T16:48:32+00:00

Found this guy a few months ago, has a good video on this. I found it fairly informative

https://youtu.be/8pQBdZ3RdfA?si=Z6-qD_hE4DD1rL1i

griii2 · 2024-01-25T12:56:51+00:00

u/TheTinMenBlog never dissapoints.

walterwallcarpet · 2024-01-25T11:27:05+00:00

Alexithymia.... another crude attempt by feminism to assign clinical pathologies to normal male traits, pretending that these are disrupting society, and are a result of male brain patterning. As such, it can join the ranks of 'toxic masculinity' and ADHD.

Perhaps their most egregious action was to take an actual pathology, autism, and ascribe it to 'EXTREME male brain patterning.

Yet, concurrently, feminist neuro 'researchers' like Gina Ripon and Cordelia Fine insist that there are absolutely no differences between male and female brains (an easily discredited nonsense). Feminists claim that we've all simply been 'socialised' to be male or female. They have to do this, of course, so that they can access male jobs. Only the best ones, naturally.

If a male opens up emotionally, what's gonna happen? What's left of his male pedestal (a very short one, compared to the towering female pedestal) disappears. He becomes an object of contempt and derision, for M/F alike.

Don't fall into the feminist trap. It's all about power, and eroding anything left to men which enable them to pair bond.

CommunicationDue9265 · 2024-03-18T19:00:24+00:00

I can really relate to this post. This is over represented amongst the male gender because we don’t have a safe place to address our emotions.

walterwallcarpet · 2024-01-24T14:13:36+00:00

..men have higher levels of alexithymia... 'suggesting that they struggle more to describe their emotions through words.'

Alternative explanations are available. Men have hyperagency. We simply get things done, and don't have to talk about it.

Women, on the other hand, have hypoagency. Often deliberately infantilising themselves, so that someone else will do the grunt. They sure have to expend a whole lot of words, emotional energy, and general hot air, to explain exactly what they want. And, you can be sure that we didn't do it just right.

As far as words and language are concerned, women also have the advantage that verbal communication networks are chiefly in the left brain hemisphere - dopamine neurotransmission, modulated and amplified by oestrogen.

The testosterone-sensitive, non-fatiguing adrenergic circuitry of the right brain lets its actions do the talking.

Edit: Let's try to take it further -

The purpose of emotion is to invoke action. If what we are led to believe is true, then gender roles... either evolved, or socially constructed, promote male hyper-agency and female hypo-agency. The male, as a hyper-agent, has no need to express any emotion of which he is well aware. He merely translates the emotion directly into action.

Females, by contrast, MUST display, express and communicate the emotion towards whatever AGENT happens to be in the vicinity. The PURPOSE of female emotion is to evoke action in another.

It is inappropriate to criticise a hyper-agent for his lack of emotional display. In any case, a man displaying emotions of distress is far less likely to be rewarded by assistance.

In the words of Warren Farrell : 'By displaying his need for help, a man forfeits his right to it.'

Display emotion, and you can kiss goodbye to the woman you're with. She won't feel secure enough to dump her own insecurities on you, or outsource responsibility for her life. She'll despise you. As will her friends. As will your own friends. That's just how it is.

Hey, don't shoot the messenger of Stoicism. He's probably crying inside.

DJ-K-Money · 2024-01-24T12:00:00+00:00

Very interesting research and much needed. I’ve spent 3 years collectively between couples therapy and individual, and while the findings of this research, seem to apply to me, neither of my therapist have been able to put a word or diagnose to it. It’s always chalked up to “men have a hard time talking about their feelings”.

Apparently there’s alot more to it than that, and by not diving deeper into that diagnosis, we’re robbing ourselves of an opportunity.

trowaway123453199 · 2024-01-24T16:28:06+00:00

And it is kind of weird how this issue is then coopted to talk about feminism and "smashing the patriarchy" as a solution when feminists are some of the groups that are the most interested in policing and controlling any forms of male emotional expression (kind of like conservatives ironically enough).

Lord-Herek · 2024-01-24T23:06:18+00:00

Don't know why you guys want men to be emotional. There's nothing good in being emotional, why do you think feminists advocate for men being emotional and vulnerable so much?

Women solve their emotional problems by talking, men by doing. If you have problem dealing with your emotions, try stoicism.

John_Bones23 · 2024-01-24T20:01:09+00:00

This is a great post

tiny-dic · 2024-01-24T13:05:08+00:00

The post said "Without words"

And then said a bunch of words.

This post is a lie.

ElisaSKy · 2024-01-25T00:18:20+00:00

It's easy to describe how I feel. But I keep being told I don't have the right to feel that way, so I shut up.

Easiest way to get a man to open up to you is to NOT tell him he has no right to experience fear when someone threatens him, that he has no right to experience a sense of violation when you cross his boundaries, or that where his boundaries are makes him broken (You are NOT Yukari Yakumo BTW!), that he has no right to experience anger should one cross his boundaries and the call him the bad guy for even having boundaries...

Do not tell a guy these things, and he'll open up pretty fast.

Title	What is alexithymia?
Author	TheTinMenBlog
Upvotes	157
Comments	24
Date	January 24, 2024 11:34 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/19ef2ox/what_is_alexithymia/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/what-is-alexithymia.1243667 https://theredarchive.com/post/1243667

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