On Unwanted Pregnancies: Why don't men's rights activists advocate "No condom, no sex"?

JJTheJetPlane5657 · 2013-09-23T00:29:06+00:00

"Why don't men's rights activists advocate "No condom, no sex"?"

I thought we did.

2013-09-22T23:48:43+00:00

I knew a girl who wouldn't have sex using a condom. Didn't fuck her because of that, actually.

4man · 2013-09-22T23:32:40+00:00

In the threads I have read condoms and the male pill are usually mentioned. Responsibility of the man to take appropriate precautions for himself are also raised; not only is conception a risk but there is risk of STI.

its_all_one_word · 2013-09-23T01:03:49+00:00

Because it only accounts for one-night stands and not for men who are in a monogamous relationship with a woman he thinks he can trust.

intensely_human · 2013-09-23T00:22:35+00:00

I think one of the primary reasons this isn't pushed is pretty simple: (a) men are already aware of these options, and (b) this movement isn't about trying to influence each others' behavior.

I'm not sure if I can think of any memes within the men's rights movement that are of the form "okay now we all need to do X and encourage each other to do so".

The only thing that comes close to being X in this case is "talk to a lawyer".

caesarkid1 · 2013-09-23T00:22:39+00:00

A woman doesn't get pregnant by herself, afterall.

No, but she does stay pregnant by herself. But that's picking nits...

I'm possibly going to get a lot of hate for this, but I'm going ahead and saying it anyway: condoms suck. There's a reason why women don't like the female condom--it's ungainly, takes away attention from sex in order to put it in, and reduces the woman's sensation. Men feel the exact same way about condoms, but we're just supposed to suck it up and deal. I'm getting older, and (TMI alert) it's getting more difficult to achieve and maintain an erection. Eventually, I won't even be able to maintain an erection while putting on a condom. And I know (because I've heard it in the bedroom before) that you're going to say, "oh, well that sounds like a medical issue, not something everyone goes through!" Well... no. How many times have WOMEN complained that even the littlest stray thought or the wrong type of stimulation completely throws them off the path to having an orgasm? How many women have simply given up on trying to have an orgasm through intercourse? Is it entirely inconceivable that men would have that same sort of issue, while not having any problem achieving erection otherwise?

I'm not saying what you're saying is at all wrong; I'm simply saying that you're advocating that I privilege YOUR pleasure at the expense of my own. That I voluntarily put a bullet in the brain of my sexual response cycle just to make up for you being irresponsible. (I'm saying "you" meaning women; I'm assuming you're a woman for this discussion). I mean, if having sex responsibly with a long-term partner means I have to give up having a fully satisfactory sex life, why would I do that? Or I should say, why should I have to do that if YOU don't?

Maybe you should wear the damn condom.

dungone · 2013-09-23T00:54:13+00:00

We talk a lot about "Men shouldn't have to pay for women who get pregnant", but there isn't a lot of talk about "Preventing women from getting pregnant".

On the contrary, we hear no end of that from traditionalists, feminists, the courts, and all of mainstream culture. Yet it has absolutely nothing to do with the remainder of men's reproductive rights, or the lack thereof. Condoms are irrelevant when it's not even your child, or you've been raped, or she lied about birth control or sabotaged yours. It's the principle of the thing - men deserve the same rights and protections that women receive. If you don't question reproductive rights and privileges for women then don't question them for men.

gopher88 · 2013-09-23T00:44:43+00:00

proper "pull out" technique

AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

because_misogyny · 2013-09-23T01:26:34+00:00

Many of us do advocate no condom, no sex. Taking control of our ability to reproduce is paramount. Without being able to control our fertility we will continue to be vulnerable to many of the negatives that fuel the MRM. The fact is that once our sperm leaves the tip of our penis we are no longer in control of our reproductive rights, this has to change.

FarmSimulator · 2013-09-23T03:58:13+00:00

Condoms (like all birth control) can fail, if women have 100 options when it does why can't we? They only sure-fire way to avoid pregnancy for either gender is not having sex. Feminism doesn't demand this on women, in fact they get furious if you suggest anything but complete & unconditional support for abortion.

Our society says failure of birth control doesn't mean you have to be forced into parenthood...when you're a woman. We just want to extend that to men. Our society says "if you don't want a pregnancy, don't have (unprotected or otherwise) sex" is not a valid argument...when you're a woman. We think that should go both ways.

I, and I assume most others here, encourage condom use to both genders to greatly reduce the chance of pregnancy/STDs. Feminists by and large to too. But that doesn't mean we can tell one side (and only one side) to go fuck themselves when they don't or when their reasonable precautions fail.

andeathSWE · 2013-09-23T02:15:10+00:00

Condoms are not 100% safe. That doesn't mean people should stop using them, but I believe it is clear that it is not enough.

Soon, we´ll have a pill for men and perhaps even more possibilities besides neutering. But is this enough? I don't think it is.

If an accident happes, women has the right to chose whether they abort or keep the child. Men don't have the same right and biologically we shouldn't.

But, we should have something similar. Like financial abort and the right to not be in the childs life if wanted.

2013-09-23T08:00:19+00:00

Part of the issue here is that people can be dumb. Really fucking dumb. It's not realistic to prevent people from getting each other pregnant unintentional.

So, since most of us don't see an embryo as a human being(I certainly don't, no more than an epithelial cell), halting an undesired pregnancy is the most practical solution. Personally, I'm more concerned about this from a cycle of poverty and an overpopulation point of a view than a men's rights point of view.

rightsbot · 2013-09-22T23:22:24+00:00

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4man · 2013-09-23T11:21:57+00:00

There were some threads a while back addressing the various forms that are available, including some experimental temporary blockages of the vas deferens, radiation possibilities, non-hormonal contraceptives for men and vasectomies. I think the focus on women being pregnant is the disparity in options post-conception.

Ideally though, if your sexual partners never get pregnant then the post-conception inequality is moot.

errentpen · 2013-09-23T12:10:42+00:00

I do have to say, that getting permission to use a condom can be important. I have a cousin who is severely, I think nearly fatally, allergic to latex. As most condoms are late based, she can't have them used on her.

rexxthunder2020 · 2013-09-24T00:06:20+00:00

I agree with the condoms sucks guy. I haven't had a lot of 1 night stands, but most women, I mean literally 75% of them never even brought up the condom.

I seriously think you could take all the money that goes into Aids research and tell Trojan to make a condom that doesn't feel like a condom and you can have all these billions of dollars, Aids would be gone in a year.

Most people hate condoms, period. So a solution that doesn't address this issue is a complete waste of time.

Sandlicker · 2013-09-24T18:44:39+00:00

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/04/03/male-birth-control-reversible_n_1400708.html

I feel like people should really be promoting this.

2013-09-23T07:09:07+00:00

Only do anal

Title	On Unwanted Pregnancies: Why don't men's rights activists advocate "No condom, no sex"?
Author	JJTheJetPlane5657
Upvotes	4
Comments	65
Date	September 22, 2013 11:21 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1mx92v/on_unwanted_pregnancies_why_dont_mens_rights/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/on-unwanted-pregnancies-why-dont-mens-rights.1163185 https://theredarchive.com/post/1163185

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