Advice About Paternity Tests

TheTerrorSquad · 2014-12-21T21:33:28+00:00

Seriously? Dont do this. You are behaving crazy.

You are in a LDR and you are questioning his family life insinuating he is an idiot. Dont act on this because of "horror stories"

You are completely undermining his autonomy and second guessing stuff on his behalf. I think you are creating drama where theres possibly none.

Stop being crazy

TempestTcup · 2014-12-21T21:41:22+00:00

If I were you I would stick to things that are your business, and stay out of his past relationships. If you stick your nose in, nothing good will come of it. Paternity testing the kids would be incredibly self-serving on your part.

My question is why this is important to you? Does him being in contact with his exes bother you? Do you want all of his resources to go to the children you two plan for the future?

All that you will be doing is creating a lot of grief and if they aren't his kids, you are going to hurt him terribly. YOU will be doing that, not the cheating of his exes.

rpMwafrika · 2014-12-21T22:08:36+00:00

This is none of your business at all, but just so you know...

In almost every state and situation, if tomorrow those kids were be discoverd to have been fathered by Martians, it wouldn't matter at all, since he is already the "assumed father" he is in the hook for life, reguardless.

Drop it, and if you don't want those kids around, walk away from their dad.

Iva3442 · 2014-12-21T21:48:51+00:00

I don't think you're actually stressed on whether he's had a paternity test done on his kids, I think you're stressed about the prospect of marrying a guy with two children from previous relationships, and the prospect of having to split financial and emotional resources between your future children and his current children.

Yes you are being self serving. Human beings are, by nature, self serving, so don't get mired in self loathing about it, it's just going to warp your view of your motivations and actions.

Sit down and have a good, long, unemotional, brutally honest conversation with yourself on whether you are ready to marry and have children with a man who has children from previous relationships. Because it sounds like that's the actual cause of your distress, not the possibility that his exes concieved the children by other men.

HappyWifeLife · 2014-12-21T21:27:24+00:00

I would just drop it. They aren't your kids. There's nothing stopping you from having children together, regardless of the paternity of the two he supports already.

Bakerofpie · 2014-12-21T21:42:45+00:00

DO NOT mention this to him. Put it out of your mind entirely. You are implying that you think he's a fool who's allowing himself to be played like one. Also, depending on the state even if he were proved to NOT be the biological father he could still be on the hook for child support anyway. And it sounds like he loves his kids. Do you really think he would be cool with cutting them out of his life and never seeing them again if he found out they were not biologically his? That would be incredibly devastating. There is NO good outcome that could possibly come from what you are suggesting.

Simpsondimsum · 2014-12-21T21:49:18+00:00

If you can't date a man with two kids (whether they're his or not) then don't.

If you want a successful man who shares his resources with only you then leave this man and look for one. This will give him the chance to continue doing what he loves (being a father) and you a chance to have a man you don't think is a lovable fool.

Make a decision for yourself.

Ps. Why would you date a man you think is stupid enough to be tricked into raising someone else's kids or soulless enough to abandon children he's raised for years because they aren't his?

homo_homini_lupus · 2014-12-21T21:52:48+00:00

It's none of your business, are you crazy?

geosh · 2014-12-21T23:27:29+00:00

Even if the kids weren't biologically his, legal paternity has already been determined, meaning he is already legally their father (which is all that matters to the courts). All you're going to do by pushing the issue is confuse the kids and drum up drama with the mothers.

elokr · 2014-12-22T02:32:20+00:00

Depending on location, the fact that he accepted and acknowledged the kids as his own is all that matters. Even if DNA says they aren't his, he will most likely still be financially responsible.

Aerobus · 2014-12-21T21:41:52+00:00

If the man loves these kids, and if he does not think about getting a paternity test done, I'd say drop it.

At most, you should voice your concern that those children may not be his in a calm, reasonable, and respectable manner, with a well-rehearsed and thought out argument making your case. Don't be overly emotional if you do choose to bring it up.

Title	Advice About Paternity Tests
Author	rpMwafrika
Upvotes	7
Comments	32
Date	December 21, 2014 9:02 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/2q03m1/advice_about_paternity_tests/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/advice-about-paternity-tests.85102 https://theredarchive.com/post/85102

Comments