Anyone else see a parallel with the white feather campaign?

BuncyTheFrog · 2012-11-19T20:42:52+00:00

I sent them an e-mail. As little as I think it will actually do, I would encourage you to do the same:

Hello White Ribbon Campaign,

I'm writing to ask why it is that you feel the need to focus your efforts on domestic violence specifically against women. Your Campaign page link does briefly touch on violence against men, but in a dismissive manner. I will argue that direct violence against men is not as lethal, but it can certainly be as extensive or more than violence against women.

For reference, this aggregate of studies (with a sample size of over 370,000) displays that violence is at best symmetrical, with women instigating violence much more than men. link Violence is violence, and while physical damage is not as prevalent when weapons are not used, emotional damage, institutional violence (I've heard countless stories of charges of abuse, rape, attempted murder, sexual assault against the children of the pair used as weapons against the husband by the wife), proxy violence (getting others to hurt their husbands, hiring hitmen [as an extreme example]), and societal shaming tactics by spreading the above accusations CAN and DOES lead not only to hidden physical injury, but damage to character, career, and heavily increased suicide rates.

Furthermore, violence against women is already universally despised; if the man himself is not aware of it, the community around him certainly is.

Violence against men, however, is not nearly as stigmatized. A woman is excused for being emotional, hormonal, or not being able to do as much damage. Men are told to "man up" and never reciprocate, only defend themselves or just take the beatings "like a man" - there's a small message that this violence is bad, but it is far more excused than any violence against women. Furthermore, it's almost always assumed in the discourse that the man did something to deserve the violence. What does this teach the man? That he can't be venurable? That his wife always has a reason to beat him and it's up to him to change to avoid the next hit? That he's failing as a man no matter what action he takes? (He can't defend himself with any sort of force or dominant aggressor policies will mean he's arrested, he can't take the beating because then he's not a man, he can't leave because then he's a deadbeat husband, he can't stay because he's a wuss or weakling for accepting the beatings)

Boys need help against violence too. A child, no matter what their sex, can and will be subjected to violence in this world. Focusing only on the girls tells boys that they are either irredeemable or do not matter. Suicide of boys starts to rise above that of girls at around 13, and I contend that campaigns like this partially contribute to the attitudes that lead to this increased rate.

These are real concerns that are swept aside in a paragraph for campaigns like this. Violence cannot be marginalized no matter how little outward harm it does. I strongly urge you to re-consider your campaign to fight against ALL violence. I know that playing up violence against women means you're more likely to get donations and funding, but if you're interested in standing up for social justice, please, stand up for EVERYONE'S social justice.

Thank you,

[BuncyTheFrog]

JohnAdamZiolkowski · 2012-11-20T03:58:21+00:00

I was told by a feminist protesting against Warren Farrell that the White Ribbon campaign, unlike the mens rights movement, "was mens rights done right". I was told that it addressed the male victims of domestic abuse, and that it indeed stated that domestic abuse was not a gendered issue. I agreed to check it out, and...

This is what I find. When "DV is a men's issue too" means "men have to stop beating women" (an alright message in of itself) but with no mention of women as violent abusers or men as victims, bleh.

AryoBarzan · 2012-11-19T20:40:28+00:00

Sure do.

Oh, and what color "ribbon" is the discussion regarding gender-violence being preached to girls and women. Anybody know?

loganizer · 2012-11-19T21:30:45+00:00

How so? I'm not sure I see it.

DerickBurton · 2012-11-19T22:12:20+00:00

Yes, I remember thinking exactly the same thing when I read about this at A Voice For Men and it pissed me off as I'd just finished a series of TTC lectures on the Great War. Apparently the new, industrialised nature of the war made the soldiers feel like they were losing their humanity. Imagine being publicly humiliated by the (supposed) nurturing sex as you were trying to recover from shell shock.

ZimbaZumba · 2012-11-20T05:05:25+00:00

History will look at the White Ribbon campaign almost in the same light as the White feather campaign. They are masters of misinformation.

Title	Anyone else see a parallel with the white feather campaign?
Author	Arby01
Upvotes	12
Comments	8
Date	November 19, 2012 8:06 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/13gsvm/anyone_else_see_a_parallel_with_the_white_feather/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/anyone-else-see-a-parallel-with-the-white-feather.1008837 https://theredarchive.com/post/1008837

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Thank you,