I fucked up. How do you guys deal with emotions.

nastynickdr · 2016-05-19T19:07:05+00:00

The more girls you fuck the less one specific girl will be "special". Never forget, shes not yours, its just your turn.

trancedj · 2016-05-19T22:00:07+00:00

Here's a method I use to process emotions quickly.

Say you see one of your girls (because you should always have more than one) being flirty and shit with another dude who's obviously a Chad and you feel jealous. What I do is welcome that emotion immediately. I say to myself "hello jealousy, long time no see. I thought you left for good." Then I usually smile and move on. I'm no Jedi (yet) but that's my approach and it works for me. It takes away any power the emotion has over me while at the same time allows me to feel. In the end it doesn't control me because I gave it the time it needs to process right away. Hope that makes sense.

Good luck man.

oprahsghost · 2016-05-19T20:04:56+00:00

Humans have emotions. Guys and girls. Everyone processes them differently.

Personally, I've gone the route you're going in that I dated a girl who was most likely fucking other guys and I got the oneitis. It happens. Ask yourself why you feel this way. Do you feel threatened by other guys? Do you like her or do you just not want her fucking other guys? That's an important one.

Suppressing your emotions isn't a long term solution. That's a good way to be in a therapist's chair in 10 years. Constantly ask yourself "why do I feel like this?" and think about your situation logically instead of emotionally.

[deleted] · 2016-05-19T18:45:45+00:00

Meet more girls.

Abundance mentality is the number 1 approach to beating oneitis.

Would you tolerate a shitty apple if you had ripe apples at your disposal?

GIFtoGasm · 2016-05-19T20:53:28+00:00

Hobbies. Keep yourself distracted. Try online dating to build confidence and try to turn that into physical confidence. Any girl with a cold sore is not worth it to me. Unless you have herpes already. Working it is probably where you need to start as well as reading no more Mr nice guy.

Good luck bro. Make a decision to be better than yesterday.

Edit: Working out. Not working it

KumonRoguing · 2016-05-19T22:37:36+00:00

You're getting a lot of good advice here. However, don't forget at the end of the day no one here can fix your problems. That's up to you, it's an important skill for a man to have.

TomFoo · 2016-05-19T21:19:13+00:00

How do you avoid getting fucked up? Easy. Get fucked up some more.

I always laugh at my friends when they say, "I gotta stop drinking." They usually don't quick the bottle until a DUI. I would have been there myself if it weren't for moving to a public-transit-friendly city and selling my car.

Point is you gotta experience intense, unbearable pain before you really understand the foundations of TRP. Romance/oneitis is fucking powerful, but when you have had enough of that bitch called Hypergamy you will hedge yourself miles before a woman fucks you over.

Also, know that the veterans and mods here don't like spell shit out. Every man has to figure the little things out for himself, but at least the big picture of trp is drawn out. You just have to color it in on your own.

netflixandch111 · 2016-05-19T21:17:19+00:00

Abundance mentality and dgaf mindset help me a lot. Also fuck other girls and try to keep emotions out of it if you can. Also staying in the gym often is a huge help.

_lock_down_ · 2016-05-19T21:13:40+00:00

So breaking down the facts of your situation. You spent some time with a girl, she met another guy, and she's now not interested in you.

First thing you're going to want to do is blame her. How could she be so unfaithful? How could she throw away such a good thing? The thing you're failing to understand is that this is just one example of why you will read a lot of people saying AWALT. Women will always want to look for the next best thing. It's biological. To quote Dante Nero: "You don't get mad at fish for swimming."

Chances are, this guy is better looking, has a better social status, or is a better lay than you. Basically he has a higher SMV than you. Now is that his fault, her fault, or your fault? Be honest with yourself. I'm sure there's something lacking in your life which makes that dude a better option to be with than you.

You said you were new to RP so I'll give you the same advice you’d hear from other people on this forum. Read the side bar. Don't just skim it. Read it and understand it. Put your ego down and identify the beta traits in your current lifestyle. Your number one goal should be to remove those traits.

You should definitely read more books. I would start with "The Way of Men" by Jack Donovan. Move onto the Book of Pook, Models by Mark Manson, and the Sex God Method by Daniel Rose. From there keep reading. There are tons of suggestions around this subreddit and its sister subreddits.

While you're reading make sure you're taking care of yourself physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Find a fitness program and stick to it. Stop eating like shit. Don't over indulge in alcohol, cigarettes, or drugs (or more frankly just cut that shit out of your.)

You mentioned controlling your emotions. Start meditating every day for at least 5 minutes. Doesn't matter what time of day just pick a time and do it. You'll learn serenity and learn how to keep your emotions in check.

Surround yourself with new hobbies. Play video games a lot? Break away from that and go learn archery, a new instrument, rock climbing, or kayaking. Get out of the house. Find a hobby that keeps you social with other people so that you're not a weird pariah.

Change what you listen to. On your jogs and morning commutes listen to podcasts like the Art of Manliness, Beige Phillip, The Art of Charm, 5AM miracle, and Total Human Optimization. Listen and learn through the examples and lessons presented by each topic. Do your best to recreate those examples yourself.

It seems like a lot, and it is, but no one ever said it was easy. You can decide if you're going to live your life letting your girl being taken by someone, or being that guy who girls want to leave their boyfriends for. Really up to what you do or don't do.

And lastly. Don't fucking talk to this girl. Remember you're the prize. If she wants to skip out then fine. Let it happen. Don't lower yourself for her because she wont respect you and she'll go fuck that guy anyway.

Start knocking this shit out and get back to us in 6 months with a field report. I bet you'll see a huge difference. Cheers.

sd4c · 2016-05-20T02:02:30+00:00

I never understood why guys get oneitis for girls that are fucking other guys. In my case i would be so turned off that it would literally be impossible to catch oneitis for her.

RedbullF1 · 2016-05-20T06:28:17+00:00

Its not easy but you need to accept that she isn't yours, you just had your turn with her, and thank whatever kind of god you believe in that you didn't waste any more time with her.

Spend the frustration, the sadness, and any negative emotion working on yourself. I'm not saying it will be easy, but it will be a whole lot less wasted time than spending a minute on trying to save something that is over for good, if not today than in a week, or a month, etc.

whatdoidoreddithelp · 2016-05-19T20:43:41+00:00

I don't get this, TRP always tells us to not go after their commitment, but what if we really want it? What if you do want to spend time with this girl.... anyone?

DubbleFUPAwitCheez · 2016-05-19T23:56:42+00:00

One aspect of dating multiple girls that I think isn't talked about enough is the fact that not all girls are going to want you for a relationship. There are ones that will just fuck you for awhile and leave. Having multiple outlets allows you to let them go easily. The onus isn't always on you, sometimes you didn't fuck up they just wanted something else. Sometimes they will want a relationship and you'll want to keep spinning plates but sometimes you'll find one you would like a relationship with that wants one with you. Then you have a decision to make. The important part is you are making the decision, it isn't something you're given, it's something you take.

ecosci · 2016-05-22T02:20:32+00:00

Why put up with a girl who is interested in another guy she wont respect you and only see you as beta bux the other guy will screw her over and she will want to branch back but dont go for it.

Sibilant_Engorgement · 2016-05-20T00:13:07+00:00

Emotions? Don't know, never had one.

[deleted] · 2016-05-19T19:02:00+00:00

What emotions?

Title	I fucked up. How do you guys deal with emotions.
Author	IHavNoClu
Upvotes	27
Comments	55
Date	May 19, 2016 5:20 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/4k3kgu/i_fucked_up_how_do_you_guys_deal_with_emotions/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/i-fucked-up-how-do-you-guys-deal-with-emotions.105676 https://theredarchive.com/post/105676

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