I don't understand why men in America even want to start a family . There's just so many unfair risk for men .

Njaulv · 2021-11-28T21:32:19+00:00

Well because it is constantly shoved down our throats by society that part of "Growing up" and "being a man" is being a father and getting married. Plus there is this rosy unrealistic picture of family life being so great being pushed constantly in advertising and media/entertainment. Also most people do have a biological drive to reproduce and find companionship. Most men do not realize the risks and unfairness until it happens to them or someone close to them that they actually sympathize with. Even then you have plenty of guys that think "well he got a raw deal, but that was just a crazy situation, it could never happen to me."

goinsouth85 · 2021-11-28T20:13:50+00:00

Cause some of us love children?

DubsPackage · 2021-11-29T02:26:23+00:00

The desire is mostly biological.

The risk is wholly artificial.

Kaylarmagic · 2021-11-29T00:28:22+00:00

Companionship and not being alone? I mean, yes there are a lot of shitty people out there but they're not all shitty.

MiKEY_SANZ · 2021-11-29T01:20:50+00:00

More and more men don’t. I believe eventually the laws will change but not super soon

Groovy66 · 2021-11-29T17:14:35+00:00

It’s a biological imperative for us too. My desire for kids kicked into overdrive at 30. I just really really wanted one.

But I was married, had my own home, had my own business so it made perfect sense to have kids

Best thing I ever did…Well, that and my new French Bulldog pup…

Rarefatbeast · 2021-11-29T02:56:19+00:00

Well, when women in most cases automatically have more rights, this will always be the case.

As well as men who never wanted these children to begin with.

They didn't really have a choice past the "condom" choice always given...

UnconventionalXY · 2021-11-29T12:31:26+00:00

Why are you so sure they do? Men largely want sex: it's women who largely want children and many men just agree to keep her happy and the sex coming; little do they know what often happens once she gets what she wants.

I think for women, sex is a means to an end whilst for men sex is the end, so they are not going to coincide for long.

The whole family arrangement is so lopsided anyway, with men being legally contracted for 20 years labour and women only 9 months; not to mention that now men's sexual expression is held hostage to what their partner wants.

Men still think that a relationship offers ongoing sex that they won't have to pay for, but the truth is that men pay for sex one way or another, in personal freedom if not in money or resources. The alternative means that sex will be occasional and every event is still going to cost: it's a no-win scenario for many.

StudentOfTheTruth0 · 2021-11-29T05:13:55+00:00

Beats me, too, why American men consider, even remotely, to have children. I am so glad I didn't. I decided against having children because I didn't trust myself that I could provide the (in my value system, very high) quality of care I would have liked to have myself when I was a child.

In the end, by now, I am happy because this self-doubt actually ended up being self-protection against this system that I didn't realize was what it was and is today. I can only feel very, very sorry for all the men who end up being abused by exes and the insanely unfair and unjust court system behind them.

Professional_Elk_703 · 2021-11-29T05:41:27+00:00

Most women make you believe they are sweet and loving and that they will never hurt you.

StinkingDischarge · 2021-11-29T16:09:21+00:00

Because they're thinking with their testicles. It's hard wired. If you make it past that point and actually start thinking with your brain you will probably nope out.

Gold-Newspaper8054 · 2021-11-29T06:20:21+00:00

I'm all for getting married some day, but kids no. Too expensive

WisconsinRiver · 2021-11-29T19:56:16+00:00

Biology. It built in for most. The older you get the more apparent this is. Especially once you have kids. Kids turn on a whole new set of survival instincts. They are natural and organic don't fight it. Just find the right partner who is also not fighting nature or you will have a bad time.

SolarEngine89 · 2021-12-01T08:54:41+00:00

Because biology. Because some of us want family and kids. Because we are not spending too much time online reading about divorces. And Because some of us do not look for a lifetime mate in apps,instead preferring to meet people offline.

Title	I don't understand why men in America even want to start a family . There's just so many unfair risk for men .
Author	enigma2shts
Upvotes	82
Comments	25
Date	November 28, 2021 8:09 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/r4d44y/i_dont_understand_why_men_in_america_even_want_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/i-dont-understand-why-men-in-america-even-want-to.1086069 https://theredarchive.com/post/1086069

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