What do you think of sh*ttesting?

luridlurker · 2022-03-06T16:55:49+00:00

Shit testing would be a deal breaker in any relationship for me. I don't see the point of normalizing crappy behavior.

IcyOwl2333 · 2022-03-06T17:41:33+00:00

24 yr old male here Most of the time its just to see if your safe the rest is bro science from garbage ass humans being.

xvszero · 2022-03-06T19:18:25+00:00

Playing games is stupid. Not a good way to start a serious relationship, and definitely not a good way to continue it.

dunndundun0601 · 2022-03-08T11:31:50+00:00

They're bullshit games that BOTH genders play and its fucked up. Complete dealbreaker that you cant open your mouth and have a conversation. I also find it ironic that RPmen have an issue with women shit testing when their ENTIRE persona is a shit test. PEOPLE suck on both sides!

PrincessTiaraLove · 2022-03-06T15:58:41+00:00

I’m not too familiar with this, but i believe RP believes it’s something every woman intentionally does. I think the truth is maybe some women do it intentionally, and some may not. I cringe at the toxic things I used to do unconsciously, and the ones I did consciously are even more cringe worthy. Thank goodness for growth! Learn to communicate and have boundaries and you’ll be fine.

jejuned · 2022-03-06T16:48:52+00:00

i think that every website i went to just now to try to get a definition for it forced at minimum two pop-ups on me where they were begging me to subscribe to their emails and buy their shit with my real life earth dollars, so i'm pretty sure that they all have an agenda

shittesting is just as stupid as the rest of the rp bs because it relies on the same dumbass foundational elements -- "she's making sure you're an alpha bro" like what kind of fucked up life are you living that you assume everybody approaches relationships like it's a game you have to win? normal, well-adjusted people don't do this shit, it's extremely unhealthy

shittesting and negging seem like they have the exact same origin point, this misguided idea that relationships and sex are something everybody is attempting to outsmart each other at via 4D chess. that's not the case

5MinuteMentalFitness · 2022-03-06T18:29:24+00:00

Your perception creates your reality.

If you perceive shit tests to be real and a great deal then when actions that are considered by others as shit tests come up you are going to see it as that and it’s going to be a big deal.

For me, I simply see it as women having fun trying to open up and share with you a little of the different aspects of her personality. If a women is doing this it does mean she some interest in you. The question is it to exploit or to grow. Exploit means it’s to manipulate grow means it’s to bond.

Women are not bad evil or secretly out to get revenge on all men.

Some are but those ones are very slim and simply women who in most cases have been hurt doo much by men they see them the way psychopaths see the rest of the world, as a dark manipulative cruel place.

You see more talks of these women in to because hurt men tend to only get those types of women and abuse victims or women with little negative experiences and kind hearts. But most just the worst case scenarios this fuelling the rp echo chamber.

JonF1 · 2022-03-07T00:12:24+00:00

I walk away.

DanMarinosDolphins · 2022-03-06T17:04:50+00:00

I think a lot of what the manosphere says makes sense. It's just squeezed through a patriarchal male supremacist lens. Shit tests are real. But it's more like playful teasing banter and it's the same thing as "negging". And people do it to each other when they're courting. It's a good sign. For example, a girl told me "wow you're old" when my age came up at a mutal friend gathering. That told me two things. She had put me in a category in her head where she was evaluating me as a potential romantic partner, otherwise, I'd be too old for what? For her. And two, she was confronted with a preconceived notion about the age of men she dates.

And I've done it myself "wow you're short". I don't like calling them negs. I like calling them "ambiguous evaluation statements". It's someone figuring out loud if they like you. The intention isn't to be mean. It's part of the vetting process. It makes people more interested in you back because we are more likely to mull over ambiguous situations.

I think there are a lot more things that make sense as well. For example "last minute resistance" is not resistance to make sure you don't think she's a slut. It's last minute resistance to make sure she's still in control and you're not a rapist. Where the manosphere gets it right is noticing the behavior. Where they get it wrong is interpreting it, and how the recommend responding to it. They recommend freezing out, or rejecting her. Punishing her. What you should do is reasure her that it's okay. That you don't mind. That you still care about her as a person. That you respect her decision to have sex or not.

I think where the allure of the manophere comes from is because they're giving us twisted half truths. And the manipulative tactics they teach us often work.

laguaguadecarne · 2022-03-08T16:11:58+00:00

Since this is getting buried, here are my takes:

I think a lot of what the manosphere says makes sense.

NO.

It's just squeezed through a patriarchal male supremacist lens. Shit tests are real. But it's more like playful teasing banter and it's the same thing as "negging".

A shit test and a neg are two different things. A neg is similar to a backhanded compliment. A shit test is to do something considered rude as a way to test one's boundaries.

You're ALMOST pretty. Is a neg.

A bait and switch type of date or the usual I forgot my wallet are shit tests.

And people do it to each other when they're courting. It's a good sign.

Who told you such a lie?! The last time someone did a shit test to me? I ghosted, blocked, and deleted.

And I've done it myself "wow you're short". I don't like calling them negs. I like calling them "ambiguous evaluation statements". It's someone figuring out loud if they like you. The intention isn't to be mean.

It's not what you like to call them or not. Some people have this tendency of intentionally making negs to prospective partners AND expecting some smartass comeback... and if they like said smartass comeback then they're all oh, I'm so in love. If that's their thing, fine. Then again, this can also be a double-edged sword: what if said smartass reply is not what the other person expected and they become a Schrodinger's douchebag ? So freaking glad I have been out of the game since 2010 (and even then, it was still just as bad).

I think there are a lot more things that make sense as well. For example "last-minute resistance" is not resistance to make sure you don't think she's a slut. It's last-minute resistance to make sure she's still in control and you're not a rapist.

NO. FULL FUCKING STOP RIGHT FUCKING HERE!!!! No such thing as last-minute resistance. It means: CONSENT CAN BE REMOVED AT ANY TIME BEFORE OR DURING ENGAGING IN SEX. This isn't some shit test.

Where the manosphere gets it right is noticing the behavior.

You could've just picked a neutral self-help book without resorting to chauvinism and/or misogyny.

Where they get it wrong is interpreting it, and how they recommend responding to it. They recommend freezing out or rejecting her. Punishing her. What you should do is reassure her that it's okay. That you don't mind. That you still care about her as a person. That you respect her decision to have sex or not.

So everything.

I think where the allure of the manosphere comes from is because they're giving us twisted half-truths. And the manipulative tactics they teach us often work.

Then why so many people in here keep coming with I tried this or that piece of advice I heard from Kevin Samuels or Rich Cooper... but it ended up ruining things for me ?

Title	What do you think of sh*ttesting?
Author	Ok-Associate-180
Upvotes	0
Comments	21
Date	March 6, 2022 3:21 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/t80xd3/what_do_you_think_of_shttesting/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/what-do-you-think-of-shttesting.1105394 https://theredarchive.com/post/1105394

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