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Refinery29 Wants Y'all To Be Cam Girls But Pretends It Supports High Dating Standards (Patreon)

SnarkSticks

June 17, 2022
559 upvotes
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy

This covert editorial ad for the sex industry can be found here: https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/cam-girl-higher-dating-standards

Link to episode: https://www.patreon.com/posts/refinery29-wants-67905127?utm_medium=clipboard_copy&utm_source=copy_to_clipboard&utm_campaign=postshare

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Title Refinery29 Wants Y'all To Be Cam Girls But Pretends It Supports High Dating Standards (Patreon)
Author

SnarkSticks

Upvotes 559
Comments 63
Date June 17, 2022 5:19 PM UTC
(4 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/vel48c/refinery29_wants_yall_to_be_cam_girls_but/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/refinery29-wants-yall-to-be-cam-girls-but-pretends.1121081
https://theredarchive.com/post/1121081
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Comments

[–]Eudorah 303 points304 points305 points 4 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link

I can't help but roll my eyes whenever I read shit like "Oh sexwork is so empowering and makes you confident!!!" Always the same privileged people trying to push this fucked up agenda that sex work is work and not "tHaT bAd." Of course you'll say that when you're sitting safely at home in front of a computer not EVER having to meet these scrotes. I'd like to see them say that to the less fortunate perople forced into prostitution because of poverty, etc. So tiring.

[–]Caspian-seaFDS Newbie 70 points71 points72 points 4 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link

This was the exact identical topic debated a few days ago, when I was in a social setting (currently living in an ultra “libfem“ Canadian financial capital). The way each person (all Western-Europeans or North Americans, privileged ppl) profusely defended “safe prostitution” as if it was such a personal important issue to them, made me want to laugh.

[–]Express_Pea_1317-13 points 4 years ago [recovered] (10 children) | Copy Link

So it’s a woman’s body, woman’s choice when she wants to kill a fetus, but not when she wants to get paid for sex?

[–]Caspian-seaFDS Newbie 41 points42 points43 points 4 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link

...People who are against glorifying the sex industry & that constant media propaganda brainwashing young girls, means we're against women's bodily autonomy???

[–]Express_Pea_1317-12 points 4 years ago [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link

Prostitution should be completely legal, period. Making it illegal is what makes it dangerous for women and young girls

[–][deleted] 20 points21 points22 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Okay that wasn't what they said tho, please use your brain cell.

[–][deleted] 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh I'm sorry I hurt your feelings 🤣 my apologies. So... are you for women's empowerment and safety or against? Judging by your oppositional comments, I'd say there's a bit of a split in you that needs to be looked at in therapy. Some cog-dis.

[–]Eudorah 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Ah, yes, ignore what was said about poverty and forced prostitution. And what makes you think pimps, etc, wouldn't have an easier time if it was legal? Use your brain. :)

[–]Metalboy5150 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Don't you think that "pimps, etc." would be a lot less necessary if it were legal, though? That's an honest question. Seems to me that if prostitution were legal, a lot of women wouldn't need the protection/organization of a pimp (or whatever you'd want to call it). Not only that, they could (to some degree) expect police protection rather than arrest if they needed assistance. I really do think things would be safer for sex workers if it were legal. That's separate to anything else that was said above, though.

[–]shoebotm 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Exactly they removed my comment saying the same lol

[–]ThrowAwayAnywayAny10 points 4 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

There’s nothing that will ever be empowering about sex work.

[–]Dog_backwards_360 -1 points0 points1 point 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah but why should it be illegal? Between adults

[–]Ill_Concentrate_149 6 points7 points8 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It's never empowering but sadly most people who say it is are the ones who practice it or benefited by it

[–]sherunsoncoffee 156 points157 points158 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

I gave up on refinery29 years ago when I noticed they were posting love spells and everyday witchcraft tips to keep a man. That was harmless fluff but sex work is very dangerous for young girls. The industry is full of human trafficking and exploitation all for male benefit. They should be ashamed of themselves pushing this narrative.

[–]Caspian-seaFDS Newbie 54 points55 points56 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

…”love spells for men” in this day & age... ?Desperation on a new level 🤦‍♀️

[–]sherunsoncoffee 34 points35 points36 points 4 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

I kid you not. I just had to look it up. Imagine using a love spell and ending up stuck with a bum.

https://www.refinery29.com/amp/en-us/modern-witchcraft-love-spell-tips

[–]Caspian-seaFDS Newbie 29 points30 points31 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Insanely tragic as it sounds, that really IS the dream of some women, considering lots around me hang onto said bums for dear life (including my neighbour). Those same bums often do the breaking up too (you can tell I’m just a lil sick of this).

[–]roxemary 3 points4 points5 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Voldemort's origin story, brought to you by refinery29

[–]NannuhBannanFDS Apprentice 444 points445 points446 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

I can’t even get past the first paragraph.

During the date, the guy (who was handsome) was honest with me that he just wanted sex. We hadn’t spoken much prior to the date but I knew I wanted more, thanks to the newfound sense of worth that webcam work had given me.

I’m sorry, what? That’s how you needed to find out that you deserve more than to be treated like a fleshlight for the night?

I’m so sad for all the women beaten into submission by this world and so furious at all the men who prey on their vulnerability.

[–]ZurfluFDS Newbie 79 points80 points81 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Also, shouldn't he have been honest about just wanting sex BEFORE the date happened..? It's dishonest to show up to a date with false intentions and then clarify them after a few drinks. If she truly has this new boundary she shouldn't have been on the date with him at all and if he was truly honest he would have told her before the date not once she's drunk.

[–]Keepers12345FDS Newbie 41 points42 points43 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

100% dishonest with her.

If he was clear upfront, then they would have never met up.

[–]Caspian-seaFDS Newbie 19 points20 points21 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes I can’t believe she actually missed this obvious as hell fact [or maybe she was pretending to play dumb, instead of facing the truth how he’s a total liar]

[–]Caspian-seaFDS Newbie 27 points28 points29 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I’m sorry for the ones beaten into submission as well, but there are plenty of us who grew up around all kinds of people including toxic male figures, yet we don’t say we have to do sex cam work to “gain confidence” - when I hear this, it honestly gives an impression something is wrong with that female commentator’s head to begin with.

[–]Positive_Cucumber_59 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

She definitely needs help, there's no doubting that. I hope she leaves the industry behind. However, just because "plenty" of people grow up with toxic adults, doesn't mean that the toxicity they dealt with as kids is precisely the same and to the exact same degree. It's awesome that you came out alright in the end, but does that really mean that you're better or that you have yourself to congratulate for rising above? I'm not so sure. Perhaps you went through less than her, or had one adult in your life to guide you through the hard stuff, maybe she went through much worse and didn't have anyone. Or maybe she had fewer resources than you, or lived somewhere more patriarchal, or has a different skin colour. I'm fairly positive that she went through something awful - I say that about all sex workers and I'm fine with making that assumption. The stats on sex workers who were sexually abused as children - it's mind blowing - speak for themselves. Of course, not everyone who was abused ends up going down that path, but there's a very clear link. What you wrote makes her sound damaged outside of being abused ("something wrong with her head to begin with"), which is blaming her, but meanwhile you really have no clue what she went through. None, zero. And it also sounds pretty devoid of empathy. From your tone and what you've said, I'd wager that you haven't seen or experienced the darkest side of humanity, or else you wouldn't play the "who was most traumatised and came out strongest in the end" game.

[–]Caspian-seaFDS Newbie 22 points23 points24 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Actually here’s where my (insensitive, I admit) comment originated from:

I come from a harsher & impoverished country in the world / cultural background than privileged ppl who always parrot that “sex work is empowering“ - they come from extremely comfortable lives in safe wealthy countries, the ones I heard parroting these infuriating comments.

what I wrote wasn’t supposed to be “devoid of empathy“, it actually came from a place of being sick of privileged (racially, financially, etc etc) people spewing garbage (“sex camming gives women confidence“) they know nothing about. The sarcastic/cynical comment that “there’s something wrong with her head to begin with“ was from this sentiment, but I see from your response why you felt I came from a totally different perspective. I didn’t mean it that way at all.

[–]indecisive-alice 322 points323 points324 points 4 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link

I’m so tired of the exploitation of women being pushed as empowering. Sends a terrible message to young and impressionable girls.

[–]sortofdense 68 points69 points70 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

exploration of women

Lord I hope you mean "exploitation". And yes indeed.

[–]Caspian-seaFDS Newbie 21 points22 points23 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

But it’s not exploitation if they “safely made a choice to sell themselves“ 🙄

[–]drinkingcoffeenow23 114 points115 points116 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

I was unfortunately pushed into that industry at 19 and did it for about a year. I once heard someone say on a podcast “once you remove one boundary who says what will happen when you remove another and another and where does it stop?” I had a shit ton of followers and after the initial excitement of the money hitting my account wore off the mental health issues hit. They hit hard. I remember once I met this older guy at a motel and gave him a foot job. Yeh cool I made 350 bucks for 45 minutes but the disgust I felt after was something I never want to feel again. I used that money for something which I finally got rid of this year. Anyway. My point is the damage it does to your mental health is not worth all the money in the world.

Edit-another thing I failed to mention is the severe scamming that goes on in the camming industry. Guys pay you or say they will pay you and then they never do. There’s all sorts of tricks they pull and the humiliation when you realize you shoved something up your ass for a hundred bucks that you will never even see…it literally fucks with your head. People really don’t get it

[–][deleted] 32 points33 points34 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Yes, when I was doing OF I had a guy do a chargeback for a private show I did for him in the chat, $500 stolen from me right before Christmas, all of that content was personally made just for him. I consider that rape. I felt so disgusting and violated. A couple weeks after that, I made the decision to quit.

[–]drinkingcoffeenow23 16 points17 points18 points 4 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

I had something similar. It was the worst most violating thing ever. I’m so sorry you went through that.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I'm sorry you did too! I hope things are going better for you now.

[–]drinkingcoffeenow23 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It’s been a few years thankfully and I’m doing well. Hope you are too :)

[–][deleted] 237 points238 points239 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Thats typical of refinery29 Praising sex work is constant.

[–]GoldandGlowingFDS Newbie 308 points309 points310 points 4 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link

As a retired sugar baby I’m really tired of seeing this shit. Most girls and women aren’t making the kind of money to support themselves and every last one of them isn’t receiving enough money to go through the indignity and bullshit that comes from scrotes who think they can buy your body, time, and affection. I supposedly got out “lucky” compared to others and I still have trauma years after the fact.

[–]FewPossession2408 103 points104 points105 points 4 years ago* (6 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, not to mention the ones that actually make money will almost surely be robbed. I made a lot of money stripping, and very obviously am a middle-class white woman. A pack of thugs tried to car-jack me after a shift. I got away unscathed because men that shake down strippers aren’t very bright, of course. I came in a few more times when I had regulars and could come in early and leave early, when thugs wouldn’t be expecting me; once the regulars got too annoying with their harassing me to date them, I had to quit. I knew I would be attempted to be robbed again because I made too much. I can’t even imagine the salivating these thugs must have when they see a 100 lb woman waltz out of a strip club with $1500 in a $2000 purse. Frankly, I’m shocked it doesn’t happen more.

[–]Infinite_Summer_4378 37 points38 points39 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I can't believe strip clubs are legal, they are so disgusting and toxic and oppressive. Every single one of those men involved are evil pigs and should be arrested (and worse) and put away for a long time. The women they trick need to have therapy and treatment to stay away from that environment.

Unconscionable that it's allowed to fester

[–]Acceptable_Goat69 19 points20 points21 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I can't believe strip clubs are legal, they are so disgusting and toxic and oppressive.

It's because men are disgusting pigs

[–]Caspian-seaFDS Newbie 16 points17 points18 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

That sounds terrifying, good on you for protecting yourself/getting out of that unscathed….

[–]FewPossession2408 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Thank you.💜

[–]frostedgemstoneFDS Newbie 32 points33 points34 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I am so sorry I can’t even imagine how horrible they must be. Even previously working in retail and food service I find that men already think they are entitled to my time and attention.

[–][deleted] 27 points28 points29 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Retired SB, stripper & OF creator, you are spot on. For MOST of the women I worked with as a stripper (8 years), they did it out of complete financial desperation. Sh-t faced every night, single moms, aware that it wasn't empowering. The trauma I've had to heal from from that time in my life was immense, I thought then that I was empowered too. It was a cope. I just didn't know any better, I had no idea how low my self esteem was until I exited the industry and realized there are men out there who actually love women. And they don't go to strip clubs, watch porn, sub to OF, or have sugar babies.

[–]FriendAffectionate40 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Wel, how come there’s celebrities making all of this money from onlyfans?

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

reread my comment

[–]FriendAffectionate40 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I gotcha so basically you had to leave to come to the realization that their is men who actually live woman.

My only thing is, what I’m getting at is that my ideal and probably some other mens idea is that the strip clubs and stuff is that the woman only care about the money and so they choose those because it’s an easy way to get a bunch of money from men who are so indulged into lust that they choose those paths.

And like a celebrity which already has the money then proceeds to get more money I mean maybe she does feel empowered that she gets payed by a lot of hornier old men and makes band maybe that’s why that she hasn’t seen herself yet.

But it just sounds like a ploy to get money not because they have low self esteem

[–]Infinite_Summer_4378 26 points27 points28 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Disgusting to even use the term "Sugar baby". You were a prostitute and the men who took advantage of you should be in jail for rape.

[–][deleted] 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]GoldandGlowingFDS Newbie 27 points28 points29 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

That was my point…

[–]Infinite_Summer_4378 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

What was your point

[–]Positive_Cucumber_59 24 points25 points26 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

Utterly disgusting. Sometimes the whole libfem (or tradwife, barely any difference) agenda seems so ubiquitous that I can't help but wonder if there's someone behind the curtain. Like in Emerald City. I might sound like a conspiracy theorist but the more I see and hear this stuff, the harder it is to think it's random.

[–]thisiskendall 17 points18 points19 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Nah, you are right. Most of the shit that's happening in our society rn is going down because it was engineered and not because it was a natural development of events. I literally still can't believe that the world I perceived to be true was fake all along. You can look into WEF. It's an "economic" forum where all the elites meet to "shape our future" (Google, NYT, Apple CEOs, world leaders, royalty, billionaires). They openly post the shit they want to implement. Think about Rockefeller foundation essay from 2009, UN Agenda 21/30, The Great Reset which they conveniently announced 2 months after the pandemic started (how could they possibly know that our economy will be destroyed in such a short span of time? the forum founder literally had already published a 200 page book wtf) and of course this forum is only the tip of the iceberg...

[–]cinnamonghostgirl 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I've been curious to look into that but I'm afraid I won't like what i read.

I mean most of it makes sense though, most people are stupid so it's very easy to control them. I just hate that the world is this way, I hate that a small group of men already planned what the future will look like, men should not be given that control, they've already done too much damage.

[–]Past_Ostrich_7853 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

👏🏼

[–]TharwaumFDS Newbie 65 points66 points67 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It’s a terrible site I can’t believe they could be so self righteous and cringe at the same time

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Sooo tired of grooming for young girls into hookup (free) or cam (paid) sex industry

[–][deleted] 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]IWantYourDad 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Did any cam girl actually say that? I have done that for a living when i was sick and couldn’t leave home most days but didn’t want to be on gov’t cheese (because it’s nasty) but it doesn’t matter why, the point is I would never think to tell someone that in a million years. It’s really the opposite unless it is a very inclusive, body positive, joyous woman doing it for the joy she gets from it and using her influence in (certain) mens lives to educate them about women’s sexual response, how women should be and need to be treated (i will not use the word “want” when it comes to being treated with respect) and a whole lot of other things that happened in the whole wide world of camming… uh never.

[–]pigeon_cannon 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Women ☕

[–]VermicelliHot1723 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I’m going to cast a love spell on you

[–]FlatAd5285 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Women ☕️

[–]owenbtwdude 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm a male so let's see what you do

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