His Kinks Are A Reflection of His Values. Kink Shame Away.

juicyjuicery · 2022-12-01T19:05:13+00:00

I feel like so many “kinks” these days are scripts ripped from porn. They aren’t even born from genuine curiosity, so I feel like language should delineate sexual desires based on how they were created. (Hopefully) no one wakes up one day with the random curious desire to hit their partner

Dorothyya · 2022-12-01T20:57:48+00:00

Tiktok for some reason sent me to the kinktok side and apparently a woman who likes to hear nice things and be complimented had a praise Kink??!! Like, this isn't normal?

SA20256 · 2022-12-01T22:59:58+00:00

God I saw a post earlier that this woman’s husband of 18 years started smothering her and choking her during sex without consent she couldn’t say no but motioned him to stop and he wouldn’t

And the comments were acting like these ‘kinks’ are normal - maybe have safe word! Maybe he got caught up! He should’ve asked beforehand!

It’s crazy the effects porn has had, he physically assaulted her and they’re over there talking ab what about safe words!

Why do you want to smother the woman you’re having sex with? If you took the sex part out it’s domestic abuse, but since it’s sex it’s him having a kink?

sommer_starrynights · 2022-12-01T20:30:08+00:00

There was a time when, if someone tried to strangle you on a date, you'd warn all your friends about him, now you're just being vanilla. How can you warn women about predators when the predatory behavior is his "kink" and you shouldn't shame him for it? I feel sad for the girls growing up in this normalized "porn violence is normal" age.

Nifan-Stuff · 2022-12-01T06:38:37+00:00

You are telling me that a guy who gets hard to slapping, choking and hitting women may be a misogynist?!!!

I'm shock!

theseviraltimes · 2022-12-01T19:36:57+00:00

Kinkshaming is my kink

lowkeyerotic · 2022-12-02T04:33:46+00:00

normally the person getting called things, chooses what they are being called. because THEY enjoy that. it's nothing FOR the caller. because some people need verbal stimulation.

but THAT is not a kink... that's invasive.

Icy-Lunch-1204 · 2022-12-01T05:41:53+00:00

YESSS!!! Finally someone agrees!! I’m so tired of seeing little girls defend those disgusting violent males!!!!

ohheyaine · 2022-12-13T23:47:21+00:00

I am so glad I left the BDSM community.

Definitely kinkshaming forever. If I hear "dom" I assume you want to control and beat me. That's just not a good thing.

lizlemonista · 2022-12-01T12:05:34+00:00

I swear I feel like kinks used to be like, he wants to have a rubber ducky on the headboard to finish on, or he likes when his pet iguana can watch. Latex skivvies and him dressed up like Nancy Reagan. etc.

Terrible-Detective93 · 2022-12-07T02:25:14+00:00

I'm glad I'm an old gen-xer. I've wandered on dirty sites before, and was horrified at some pretty horrific stuff that makes old-timey things like 9.5 weeks look very tame. Plus I hate that those sites suggest things like 'if you like X you probably like Y' and then Y makes you never want to look at a dirty site ever again. Today's stuff is not like the feather-dusters and silk scarves of yesteryear. Sure they are getting paid to do these things but it still makes me sad the level of absolute depravity. I can't even say what I'm talking about, it's too gross.

athanais · 2022-12-15T10:58:08+00:00

I briefly had a cringey situationship with a guy who was porksick af, but also into the daddy/little girl kink. Kept telling me to call him either daddy or bear... eventually I finally said you know what, I'm calling you pig.

He was abdominally obese with like four chins that his neckbeard would hide, and not even a cute face, but the most shallow man I ever knew what it came to a womans appearance.

He wanted only women who were very short and petite. At a towering 5'5 I was too tall for him. Too many things for him even though I was still very young and toned due to weight lifting but he would absolutely shred my appearance while he looked the way he did.

And it wasn't hard to psychoanalyze why he was into the little girl kink. For one thing he found small much younger women attractive, but he was also massively insecure and wanted to feel powerful compared to his little girl.

Video game addict of course.

He had these very specific things he found attractive like, belly chains and tall socks.

If there was one person in my life I could un-fk...

And never once actually gave me an orgasm, naturally. Blamed me, naturally, even though he could rarely get it up and when he did it was awkward. Tried to display DoMiNaNcE once by slapping my ass hard during and I gave him a look that made him look down like a punished puppy and he said, got it, never again.

DontBelieveMyH8R · 2022-12-08T14:43:00+00:00

I think I have chosen exes who secretly liked to cheat on me. I do not enjoy being cheated on, and I was the type to stay so loyal I stopped seeing even platonic friends just because the actual-cheating boyfriends (now exboyfriends) were jealous of my platonic friends who are mostly male. I feel there is a widespread normalised "cheating kink" and it should stop being labeled a kink, it's disease. Cheating disease. I got so traumatised by cheaters I don't go for humans nowadays, just motorcycles and animals and food in a nonsexual aromantic way.

Sesameandme · 2022-12-01T17:17:49+00:00

My ex used to like me being the dominant one, in vast contrast to how it was outside the bedroom lol

athanais · 2022-12-15T11:11:29+00:00

Friend of a ex of mine used to put his gf in diapers and roleplay that she was a big BABY so that he could get hard enough to perform. He admitted she was not physically his type whatsoever and that only the kink got him hard.

Ffs.

helloiamaudrey · 2022-12-01T15:53:01+00:00

But I'm kinky like that and I'm a woman, and on the giving end (top basically)

bizzarbra · 2022-12-01T19:41:17+00:00

Thank you! I don't see a point in shaming something like furries, or pony play. But a lot of kink culture is just dehumanizing. Make it stop!

ableswag75 · 2022-12-02T03:10:58+00:00

What about her kinks?

ZachSoup19 · 2022-12-01T17:39:06+00:00

Lol of course the mods removed the comment about the girl saying she liked choking guys

2022-12-01T14:16:45+00:00

[permanently deleted]

forestorbitals · 2023-01-11T18:58:54+00:00

Okay perfect because he has a caretaking kink

Title	His Kinks Are A Reflection of His Values. Kink Shame Away.
Author	SnarkSticks
Upvotes	767
Comments	68
Date	December 1, 2022 5:14 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/z9f9bq/his_kinks_are_a_reflection_of_his_values_kink/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/his-kinks-are-a-reflection-of-his-values-kink.1141172 https://theredarchive.com/post/1141172