Inspired by this tweet I ran across

https://twitter.com/t0nit0ne/status/980401431281917952

"Most men don't marry the woman they love(d) the most. They marry the woman that is around when they are ready to marry"

I know women do this too but women are much more deliberate about finding a husband because of their biological clock. They can freeze their eggs or marry younger to avoid any more pressure than they need. They invest more mental bandwidth into the problem at an earlier stage in life.

For guys, I notice our attitudes are more blasé about when it happens. I don't think I've met a guy who's admitted that his marriage had an aspect of convenience but if I listen to the advice they give, the attitude is pervasive. A coworker told us younger guys to have our fun and fuck our fill until the age of about 27, then start looking for a serious life partner. All of the married men nodded in agreement. You also see a lot of guys saying they can relax their foot off the pedal in dating a bit because women in their late 20s start putting in more effort for your commitment.